ill Page 599 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

D.J. Williams Just Kept Giving The NFL Non-Human Urine Samples
Broncos linebacker D.J. Williams was suspended for the first six games of the upcoming season after failing a drug test last year. Williams has been fighting the suspension all the way up to a federal appeals court, but documents filed don't seem like they're going to help his case....

ESPN Trots Out Matt Millen To Fumble His Way Through The Freeh Report
On a day like today, you can find any number of fine journalistic outlets that are covering the Freeh report in painstaking, intelligent detail. You can follow Sara Ganim, who has already won a Pulitzer Prize for her diligence on the Sandusky scandal. Or you can follow Yahoo's Dan Wetzel, who is p...

Phillies Announcer Melts Down: "Somebody Figure Out How To Fucking Get Scott Hairston Out!"
Scott Hairston owns the Phillies. Just plain steals their lunch and eats it in front of them, then poops in the bag and gives it back. He's a journeyman against everyone else, an All-Star against Philly....

Our Race Horses Are Broken, America
Our horses are sick. Our thoroughbreds are thoroughly inbred. They are locomotives sitting atop toothpicks. They are fragile and friable, designed to run but not to recover from running. And each time they break down or wear out, we chalk it up to an individual horse's shortcomings, rather than the ...
![The World's Craziest Home Run Derby Was A Rousing Success [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17sfwc5jdgdesjpg.jpg)
The World's Craziest Home Run Derby Was A Rousing Success [UPDATE]
We gave you fair warning about the world's weirdest Home Run Derby a few days ago, the one with the on-field party, live entertainment, and trampoline in left field, among other attractions. Well, lest you think that was all just bluster and hype, here's a photo of Ryan Petzar of 97.3 ESPN Radio try...

Ryan Howard: "I'm Going To Go Out There And Give 100 Percent Of 85 Percent."
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Howard isn't healthy, but he's healthy enough....

How To Grill The Perfect Steak, According To John Madden And Three Actual Chefs
Picking a method for grilling steak is like picking the perfect fly to catch trout. It depends on who you ask. In thirty five years of writing about fishing many people have asked me what's the best fly? As expert fishermen have taught me, by successful example, the best fly is the one you catch fis...

This Jaguar's Workout Schedule Is Just The Best
Jacksonville DE Austen Lane tweeted out his Monday "workout schedule," and it's fucking gold. (Zones to be blasted today: abs, upper body, more abs, and arms.) But there's plenty of time for Instagram photos of abs, inspirational quotes, and tweeting about eating—which means Lane is already at an Al...

A Dispatch From "Williamsburg Night" At The Brooklyn Cyclones Game
Last week, we treated you to a lovely photo essay from the Brooklyn Cyclones' "Williamsburg Night."...

Rawlings Sues Wilson Over Brandon Phillips's "Gold" Glove
The Gold Gloves are mostly pointless, and largely a corporate gimmick. (They're officially the Rawlings Gold Glove Awards, and have been since 1957, when they were thought up by a Rawlings sales manager for some free advertising.) They have cachet, because they're voted on by managers and coaches, a...

You Won't Regret Reading About The Seven Best Bill Murray Stories
Bill Murray is an awesome dude, and he'll always have a special place in the hearts of sports fans for doing stuff like this, this, and this....

Sportswriters: Just Because You're Simpletons, That Doesn't Make You Forrest Gump
On Sunday, the usually great Times reporter Karen Crouse came out with this unfortunate bit of imagery:...

Instagram Photos From The Brooklyn Cyclones' "Williamsburg Night"
It was Williamsburg Night at MCU Park, home of the Brooklyn Cyclones, a hipster-friendly mashup of the usual minor league quirkiness and a particular local flair. (And probably super-familiar for attendees, since they all moved to Brooklyn from the Midwest three years ago, amirite?) Among the promot...

At Last, A Women's Final Worth Watching: The Serena Williams-Aggie Radwanska Match Will Be Awesome
When the Serena Williams-Victoria Azarenka Wimbledon semifinal started today, Mike Tirico and Mary Joe Fernandez made it pretty clear that they considered the match the de facto final. This was a popular theory, but it's wrong. Serena's straight-set victory put her into the final against Agnieszka ...

Players Sue NFL Over Bounty Punishments
Grab your popcorn. Two days after upholding his own disciplinary rulings against four Saints players for their roles in the bounty scandal, the NFLPA has filed a lawsuit challenging both the decision, and Goodell's authority to make it. The union is suing on behalf of Anthony Hargrove, Will Smith, a...

Deron Williams Will Re-Sign With The Brooklyn Nets For $100 Million
Happy Fourth of July, Nets fans! Looks like that Joe Johnson trade earlier today actually was the start of something good. Word just came down via Deron Williams' Twitter account that he's decided to re-up with the team. Yahoo's Adrian Wojnarowski reports it's for five years and $100 million. Even i...

The Grierson & Leitch July 4 Extravaganza: Movies That Made Us Love America
Today and yesterday, Grierson & Leitch honors America by spotlighting films that exemplify the best our country has to offer—and the worst. Yesterday: Movies that made us feel worse about America. Today: Movies that made us love this goddamned country. ...

The Joe Johnson Trade Doesn't Yet Mean Anything For The Nets
The Nets have spent the last 48 hours either assembling a superteam that will contend immediately for a championship, or ruining their first half-decade in Brooklyn. Since last night, the team finalized a deal with the Atlanta Hawks to send just under a third of their roster south in order to acquir...

Records Suggest PSU Officials Knew In 2001 That Sandusky Shower Incident Involved More Than Just "Horsing Around"
The meeting supposedly took place in 2001 in response to the now infamous shower incident reported by Mike McQueary. As we learned from CNN, Penn State's trio (VP Gary Schultz, president Graham Spanier, and athletic director Tim Curley) had initially devised a three-pronged approach to dealing with ...

Dontrelle Willis Retires. Mark Prior Tries To Make A Comeback. Baseball Remains A Sadistic Bastard.
Dontrelle Willis retired on Monday at the age of 30, bringing to an end one of the most baffling baseball careers of the past decade. The day before, Mark Prior, nursing an oblique strain, threw a bullpen session for the Pawtucket Red Sox. He hadn't pitched in a game since June 21, when he scuffled ...