ill Page 664 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Night On Ubaldo Mountain
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
William Houston Doesn't Handle Criticism Well
Billy Houston, after taking potshots at bloggers in two consecutive posts and catching hell for it, resorts to a totally legitimate journalistic strategy: deleting all the comments on one, and deleting the second post altogether. [Truth & Rumours]...
Willie Colon Had Enough Of Big Ben's "Sausage Party"
Colon said he felt women talking to him to get to Roethlisberger was "gay," and the male-to-female ratio at one club's VIP section was "a sausage party." Well, at least one of them managed to get some that night. [TSG]...
Stories That Don't Suck, With Special Guest Host
Today, our pal Alex Belth, proprietor of Bronx Banter, is taking the reins. He's selected four stories for your enjoyment....
ESPN.com Editors Can't Appreciate A Good Manly Kiss
It's not so much that the image on the front page of Soccernet is Gary Neville warmly congratulating Paul Scholes on his game-winner. It's more that the original filename was "nevillegay" (since been changed to "nevillekiss"). [ESPN.com]...
A Blow-By-Blow Account Of The Vomiting Phillies Fan
In our #tips section, we received a purported firsthand account from someone sitting in the same section as Matthew Clemens, the New Jersey man accused of throwing up on an 11-year-old girl. We reprint it here for your reading pleasure....
Book Excerpts That <em>Do</em> Suck: Rick Reilly® On Chess Boxing
Rick Reilly has farted out a new book, Sports from Hell, and ESPN has a sampling: "Q: What wears one glove, chases queens, and isn't Michael Jackson? A: A chess boxer." [ESPN]...
Bill Houston Has A Wildly Original Insult For Bloggers
Surprise! Some people took issue with Houston's pissy little rant earlier this week. To them (and us), Houston says: "F.U. And say hello to your friends in the basement." [UPDATE: He's deleted the entire column.]...
Jerry Jones Clarifies His "Social Moment," Explains That Bill Parcells Is, In Fact, Worth A Shit
Jerry Jones took the opportunity at a diabetes fundraiser yesterday to explain away his sodden musings on Bill Parcells, and somehow he came away sounding a lot sillier than he did last week during cocktail hour at Ocean Prime....
Last Night's Winner: Not This Guy
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Unlike this Phillies fan, who on Wednesday at Citizens Bank Park allegedly jammed his fingers down his throat and vomited on an 11-year-old girl and her father....
Scott Stapp Ruins Baseball
Here's Stapp, known to you as lead singer for the band that made you hate both music and God, howling a song called "Marlins Will Soar." Sample lyric: "Let's play ball, it's gameday. We want strikeouts, base hits, double plays." [Stapp's Blog]...
Phillies' Season Officially Kicked Off By Lap Dance For The Handicapped
It's a couple days old, but we needed time to come to terms with this video of a man in a Jazzy Scooter getting ridden by one of Philly's, um, Phinest. [via Busted Coverage]...
Reporter-Turned-Blogger Blasts Blogger-Turned-Reporter
This is William Houston, former Toronto Globe and Mail columnist. He was relevant, oh, around the last time the Maple Leafs were. He has some absurd things to say about the new Leafs beat writer....
Ehhhh...Fuck Off, Dale Hansen
"That story we had earlier tonight about Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, if that's what it is (and our news director thinks it is), is yet another example of the decline of journalism as we once knew it." [WFAA]...
Slurring Jerry Jones Bad-Mouths Bill Parcells, Tim Tebow
A source sends along this video of a seemingly inebriated Jerry Jones waxing off about Tim Tebow ("he'd never get on the field"), Bill Parcells ("not worth a shit"), and how he got his stadium. Read the rough transcript after the jump....
To Sit Or Not To Sit: Do Players Owe Fans Anything?
It's that time of year again: The time when NBA teams, secure in their playoff destiny, start phoning in their remaining regular season games. But are these millionaires really just robbing you, John Q. Slob, of your hard-earned minimum wages?...
Phil Mickelson: Your New, Women-Friendly, Morally Pristine Sportswriter Unicorn
Once, not so long ago, a famous golfer was unfaithful to the public image that sportswriters had helped construct for him, and the sportswriters were sad. But then along came Phil Mickelson, and the sportswriters turned him into a Lifetime movie....
Add Providence To The Institutional Control Watchlist
Two Friars players were arrested early today for assaulting a fellow student. Why? Oh, the usual reasons. They were looking for someone to beat up, and he was the first person they came across....
Has Anyone Seen Bill Murray?
The Cubs had to pull a random family out of the stands to toss out the first pitch, after Bill Murray was a no-show. I'll tell you where he wasn't: filming Ghostbusters 3. Get on it, Bill! [Daily Herald]...
Some Steelers Fans Have Soured On Big Ben: "He's A Jagoff"
Ben Roethlisberger won't be charged in the Milledgeville bathroom incident, but some Steeler faithful have declared Big Ben unfit to wear the Black & Gold. Our Pittsburgh correspondent, Domenick Cosentino, visited local watering holes last night to get some unfiltered Yinzer reaction....