im Page 549 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Rock Climbing Bear Is The Most Xtreme Bear
We've seen some good bears, but we've never seen a bear who is this extreme. Oh, you like playing with a tether ball, Tether Ball Bear? That's neat, but Rock Climbing Bear is over here riding the razor's edge, man. Excuse him while he kisses the sky....
The Most Brilliant Thing You'll Hear All Day
I'm not going to explain this one, because I have faith in you. But I will say that you have to listen to the whole thing, and follow along with the subtitles....
Tired of dumb sportswriting? Our pal Yago Colás and friends are raising funds for a site that will bring together sports and the academy, in service of addressing serious questions about class, race, gender, and all the rest. Check out their plans, and think about kicking them some money. [The Allro...
Jose Fernandez's Fake-Out Play Was Ballsy And Awesome
One of the coolest things about Jose Fernandez is that even though he is one of the most dominant young pitchers in the league, his two most impressive highlights have nothing to do with pitching....
The Top 10 Items Worth Stealing From Publix
When news broke this morning that Heisman winner Jameis Winston may have been busted for lifting some crab legs from a Tallahassee-area Publix supermarket, we felt a bit sad. There are way better things to shoplift from the store Where Shopping Is A Pleasure™, after all. Here are ten of those things...
18 Things <em>Rolling Stone</em> Couldn't Fit Into Its Bill Simmons Profile
I went to a Clippers game with Bill Simmons, heard him explain why other players don't like Blake Griffin, and joined him in making fun of a pre-shitstorm Donald Sterling, who sat, inert, across the court from us. ("Maybe it's like a Weekend at Bernie's kind of thing.") I ate sushi with Bill in L.A....
Someone Robbed Paul George's House While He Was At The Game
I bet last night, after another demoralizing thrashing at the hands of the Hawks, Paul George couldn't wait to get home and away from it all. But before he returned, his parents informed him that his house had been burgled, the thief making off with over $15,000 worth of stuff. Talk about kicking a ...
Yankees Fans Boo Picture Of Robinson Cano, Until The Real Cano Shows Up
This is another great gag from Jimmy Fallon, along the same lines as the Matt Harvey prank Fallon pulled on Mets fans. The setup here is pretty simple. A producer gets Yankees fans on the street to boo a large picture of Robinson Cano and after they boo and turn back to the camera, the producer tel...
Runaway Novelty Beer Blimp Just Floating Around, Forever And Ever
If you live in the Canadian province of New Brunswick, keep an eye out for a 21-meter beer blimp that is currently floating, aimlessly, through the Canadian sky. ...
Still Diggin': Museum Of Natural History's Digital Archives
Sam Roberts on the digitized images now available from the Museum of Natural History. ...
Jim Cantore Would Kick Ed Hochuli's Ass
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....
Nene Suspended One Game For Head-Butting Jimmy Butler
Wizards big man Nene has been suspended for Game 4 against the Bulls after this altercation with Jimmy Butler. Early in the fourth quarter of the Bulls win over Washington, Nene head-butted Butler, then grabbed him around the head and neck, and the two had to be pulled apart by referees and teamma...
Joakim Noah Got Into A Shouting Match With Wizards' Security
NBA teams enjoy many advantages when playing on their home court, but the Washington Wizards appear to have one thing going for them that others don't: a head of security who isn't afraid to get into it with visiting players....
Story About Teacher Who Gives Child Lap Dance In Class Is Very Weird
Houston CBS affiliate KHOU dropped a story on its website this morning about a middle school teacher who admits she gave a student a lap dance during class. Somehow, the lap dance part is the least weird thing about it....
What If All Baseball Players Were Fat?
Upon several viewings of Bartolo Colon's hilarious plate appearances, the Deadspin staff discussed what baseball would be like if every player looked like the husky Mets hurler. Or, really, just fat. So here's some recent MLB highlights where we made all the baseball players fat. Video's above, GIFs...
How Difficult Is It To Qualify For The Boston Marathon?
We've spent the better part of this week focusing on elites, but now we turn back to the heart of the Boston Marathon: the qualifiers....
Holy Shit, The Marlins And Braves Cannot Stop Striking Each Other Out
Remember last night, when the Atlanta Braves and Miami Marlins combined to strike out 28 times, a thing that had never before occurred in the modern era? Well, those crazy free-swingers went and did the exact same thing today, and they didn't even need a full nine innings to do it this time. ...
Real Madrid Take Lead On Bayern With Sexy Goal
...Whoa....
Even The Chicago Bulls' Security Staff Is Sick Of Joey Crawford's Shit
The Chicago Bulls have set up a kind of text-message hotline that fans can use to hail the assistance of the arena's security team. Reader Dave was at the game between the Bulls and the Wizards last night, and he tried his luck at getting referee Joey Crawford—who made a number of bad calls and whom...