im Page 721 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
These German Soccer Fans Were Thrown Out Of A Stadium For Having Sex In The Stands (Twice)
Scoreless soccer games can be terribly boring. Like any long car ride, though, there are distractions for the monotony: songs, chants, popcorn, beer, "the wave"—and also, sex in public....
The Best Of Grantland, Now Available In $20 Leather-Bound Edition
If you've been thinking, "Grantland is cool and all, but it would be so much more enjoyable in a $20 leather-bound quarterly published by McSweeney's," then holy shit, you should go work in publishing immediately. Comes complete with a running diary of Hoosiers from you-know-who. [McSweeney's, via O...
Mark Sanchez, Joe Flacco, And The Franchise Quarterback Con
There was a moment during last night's Jets-Ravens game—a wacky, interminable affair that had so many turnovers, penalties, and replay reviews that one would have been better off watching baseball for crisp play—when it became clear that Joe Flacco and Mark Sanchez are running the NFL's most success...
Cris Collinsworth And Al Michaels Both Said The Word "Dong" On National Television Last Night
Why, yes, of course this is news....
A Homemade Infographic Explaining How Badly Mark Sanchez Played Last Night
Here's a breakdown of the 235 yards Mark Sanchez produced in Baltimore, as he powered the Ravens past his own New York Jets....
It's Your Weekly Mark Sanchez Lowlight Reel! Featuring Appearances By Joe Flacco
The ineptness at the quarterback position last night was, in a word, staggering. Mark Sanchez—this year's king of the lowlight reel—fumbled four times and threw an interception, while Flacco fumbled once and threw an interception as well. Together, the two completed just 21 of 66 passes. If you sp...
Phil Simms Invites Himself To The Telestrator Dong Party
Wrote tipster Tom B., "Phil Simms drew a cock and balls shooting a small load during the Packers game!" However, like-minded tipster Andrew H. presented it without comment. Potato. Potato....
The Jaguars Grounds Crew Does Not Abide By Traditional NFL Field-Painting Rules
On a traditional NFL field, the arrows next to the big numbers painted every 10 yards point toward the nearest end zone. The Jacksonville Jaguars ground crew does not adhere to those stupid traditions at EverBank Field....
Another Ditka Kid Got Charged With DUI
Don't worry, Mark, daddy's too worried about spitting on Pearlman, or reading a book he commented on probably without reading, to pay much attention to this little legal entanglement....
Joakim Noah Is Not Afraid To Show Off His Lockout Business Plan
Writes tipster Zach, "It's good to see that Joakim Noah is spending his time during the lockout figuring out some low post moves and not hanging out with Florida coeds...oh, wait..." See what Zach did there? Noah is hanging out with coeds. That's why you're looking at that picture right now, notici...
Australian Swimmer Tries To Cover Up Skateboarding Injury With False Hit-And-Run Claim, Fails
"Olympic swimmer Kenrick Monk has tearfully admitted to inventing a story about being the victim of a deliberate hit-and-run car incident. In a blow to his chances of representing his country again, Monk, 23, revealed he had broken two bones in his elbow while skateboarding on Wednesday. At the ti...
The "Play Tebow!!" Billboard Is Live In Denver
The "Play Tebow" billboard is now up on I-25 and 58th Avenue in Denver, and it is comically simple. It is a digital thing, which is fancy, but otherwise it appears to have been devised by a middle school yearbook committee....
Hey, Craig Kimbrel! Don't Worry, The Internet Has Found Your Wallet
According to one reader, Kimbrel's Wednesday night did not get any better after his disastrous meltdown against the Philadelphia Phillies. Let's recap the rookie closer's part in eliminating the Braves from playoff contention:...
This 6-Foot-4, 320-Pound NFL Player Drives A Hello Kitty Convertible Smart Car
Chargers DT Antonio Garay was just fined $15,000 by the NFL for a hit below the knee on Tom Brady in Week 2, but he will be laughing all the way to the bank, because he drives a tiny car with a Hello Kitty on it and tweets pictures of it all the time. So, ha!...
Last Night's Rays/Red Sox Madness, In Chart Form
Jack Moore acknowledges right from the start that it's impossible to quantify what took place in Baltimore and St. Pete. But he did calculate how the odds for both Boston and Tampa Bay fluctuated throughout the evening, and that snazzy image he created certainly puts it all in perspective. [FanGrap...
The Best Four Minutes Of Baseball Last Night, Presented In Split Screen
We've put together a split-screen video syncing up the conclusions of both Yankees-Rays and Red Sox-Orioles that we hope the IP crew at MLB is too hungover today to notice. Enjoy....
Matt Bryant Had His $3,000 Golf Clubs Stolen By His Chinese Food Deliveryman
"'He went into the open garage, took the clubs, delivered the food and went on his way,' said Braselton Police Assistant Chief Lou Solis." [AJC, via Larry Brown Sports]...
The Fan Who Threw A Banana At A Black Hockey Player Did Not Know It Would Be Seen As Racist
From the AP: "The lawyer for a man accused of throwing a banana at a black NHL player says his client deeply regrets what he did and had no idea his actions could be seen as racist."...
A Sampling From One Artist's Effort To Draw All 295 Members Of The Baseball Hall Of Fame
Summer Anne Burton is drawing every member of the National Baseball Hall of Fame in chronological order. She began the project in January, 2011, and she would be thrilled to draw your favorite baseball player for you. Here are some of her drawings. Click the images to expand....
Let's Watch A Dutch Guy Scare The Living Hell Out Of A Chinese Guy On The Subway
This video's called "Chinese vs Brawl Dutch (FIGHT)." Though it's difficult to understand what, exactly, is being said and disappointing how, exactly, they back away from the brink without resorting to violence, it's oddly mesmerizing to see Chinese get in the wrong Brawl Dutch's face....