im Page 807 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

OSU Students Wallow In Their Own Urine
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Watch This, Then Go Check Your Water Supply For Drugs
No words...They should have sent a poet....

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Body-Painted Mary Magdalene Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....

Study: College Basketball Refs Suck, Too
A couple of professors watched a bunch of college basketball games and came to the very reasonable conclusion, in a peer-reviewed academic journal, that they were all being reffed by Dick Bavetta....

2012: Why See The Movie If You Already Know What's Coming
Yes, everyone's favorite lizard conversationalist, Darren Daulton, has a website to promote his metaphysics "starter kit" so everyone can be prepared for falling buildings, tidal waves, and John Cusack's erratic piloting. [Dutch2012.com]...

Ex-Patriots Rough Up Some Children For Charity
Cameramen aren't the only people who need to be wary around the Patriots. A lesson learned too late for some students who thought they were going to meet their heroes in the name of a good cause. Instead: carnage....

Jenn Sterger's Post-Op Recovery Documented Via Twitter
Will Carroll, America's most prominent Injury Expert, became her Nightingale last weekend after her surgery. Not a euphemism. [InjuryExpert]...

Manny Pacquiao Will Soon Add "Oscar Winner" To Long List Of Titles
Producers recently released the full trailer for Pacquiao's latest movie—his 10th according to IMDb—and it is a doozy. The film is called Wapakman, and appears to be a semi-autobiographical tale of Manny's life as the world's greatest (only?) Pinoy superhero. It's got monsters, bikini babes, adorabl...

ESPN Horndoggery Classic: Bill Creasy
The NY Post revealed some more of Bristol's unseemly history last Friday with a brief item about a 2004 harassment suit filed against ESPN's first president of programming, 74-year-old Bill Creasy. Here is the complaint, brimming with old man creepiness....

Tila Tequila Not Finished With Shawne Merriman Yet
The D.A. wouldn't prosecute Merriman for assaulting the TV "personality," but she can still sue him for assault, battery, false imprisonment and emotional distress. Oh, you better believe you haven't heard the last of this. [TMZ]...

Browns Fans Know Understatement
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Searching For...Melissa Lima On Behalf Of Alcides Escobar's Estranged Wife
A movement is afoot. Hotshot Brewers prospect Alcides Escobar's ex-wife emailed us for Melissa Lima's contact info to involve her in an online petition about deadbeat major league ballplayers. Welcome to Jezespin....

Two Of Three Tennessee Robbers Kicked Off Team
Nu'Keese Richardson and Mike Edwards have been "permanently dismissed" from Tennessee's football team after being arrested for armed robbery last week. (No decision on teammate Janzen Jackson.) So that's the quickest way to squander a football scholarship. [GoVolsXtra]...

Peyton Manning Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Peyton Manning, who won the weekend when it was gift-wrapped with a pretty bow and handed to him by Bill Belichick....

Incompetent Soccer Child Is Also Adorable
Good thing this little girl lives in America. If this were Colombia, she'd be murdered for her own goal. (And if it were China, she would have been aborted five years ago for being a girl.)...

Timberwolves GM Wants Fans To Know He Is Aware Of How Much Team Sucks
Mired in a nine-game slide, the Timberwolves are struggling to get acclimated to Kurt Rambis' triangle offense. Further, the team stinks. So, GM David Kahn did the only sensible thing - he wrote a letter to the team's 10 fans....

This Guy Is Trying To Steal John Daly's Bit
And no, I'm not referring to Udorn Duangdecha getting his stomach stapled and surviving solely on Diet Coke and cigarettes - check out those slacks. Crap, they're so loud that Marlee Matlin heard him trying them on. [Devil Ball Golf]...

Your Late Afternoon College Football Viewing Open Thread
It's time for the second round of games on this wonderful Saturday afternoon. There's plenty of options on the telly, with Florida at South Carolina as perhaps the most intriguing. Can you imagine how excited these girls are right now?...

I Bet The Graphics Guy Who Cropped Indiana's Logo This Way Feels Like A Boob
Heh. Tit. And for those of you worried about this warping our young people, it has already been changed to a less-offensive image. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to make "BOOBLESS" appear on my calculator. (Thanks, reader Josh)...

It's Too Bad The Title 'Psycho' Was Already Taken
So, Ron Artest is making a movie about his life. That's...um, interesting....