im Page 891 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Elijah Dukes Continues To Bat 1.000
If you're a social worker who is considering a foster care applicaton, how could you not approve the couple who is related to Elijah Dukes? A 17-year-old girl who is in foster care with a relative of Dukes told the Tampa police that Dukes got her pregnant. The article goes on to say that Dukes will ...
Jeff Reed Is The Most Fun Kicker Of All Time
You might remember our little Christmas Eve present for you last year: Pittsburgh Steelers kicker Jeff Reed taking a picture of him nearly nude in the mirror....
Your College Hoops Video Game Just Got More Annoying
You might have thought it strange or #### to see J.J. Redick fitted in those motion capture sensors for the NCAA video game last year, but that's nothing compared to the three Florida fellas on the cover of this year's game....
We Congratulate The Spurs On Their Fourth Title
Well, it's certainly starting to look like we're all witnesses to Tim Duncan methodically steamrolling to his fourth NBA title. (That would tie him with Shaq, by the way.) What was most distressing about the Spurs' 103-92 Game 2 win over the Cavaliers last night was that it was over so early; the ou...
RBI Baseball, Bracket Style
If you happen to be in the general vicinity of the Comfort Suites Airport hotel in Columbus, Ohio this weekend, do we ever have the leisure activity for you: It's 2007 Ohio National RBI Baseball Tournament. Thar's right, kids: For $100, you can play the world's greatest video baseball game in which ...
Arizona Is Prettier Than Tennessee, And Knows It
Last night — in ESPN programming we were not watching — the Arizona Wildcats softball team beat Tennessee 5-0 to win the NCAA Championship. One of the fun aspects of NCAA softball is that, if you have one good pitcher, she can just pitch every game. Tarnye Mowatt pitched all 60 innings for the Wildc...
Ducks Fans, Your Decade-Plus Of Suffering Is Over
We congratulate the Anaheim Ducks on their first Stanley Cup title last night. We can't imagine the relief of Ducks fans across the nation, who were able to sleep easy last night, knowing they must no longer fear that they, like their grandfathers and other ancestors, will die without seeing their b...
With Special "Look For Real Killers" Action!
This is going to sound morbid, but we've always wanted the opportunity to play as O.J. Simpson in a football video game. His combination of speed, power and downfield slashing action, we've always thought, would make us unstoppable. And, of course, deadly....
Hey, Everybody, Pasty Fellas!
As surely anyone with a commenting account — and we remind anyone who wants one to email the Deadtern and state your case — knows by now, the ladies over at Ladies ... have posted their Hot Blogger Bracket. The whole experiment is a perfect case study in blog physics: Hold a contest that only blogge...
Carl Monday: The Early Years
Ever wonder what drives crusading field journalist Carl Monday? He didn't just pursue the Mike Cooper library case out of thin air; there had to be an underlying force, some childhood trauma, perhaps, which would cause him in later life to obsess over a perfectly ordinary human function. We wonder w...
We've Always Thought We Kind Of Look Like Youppi
In a clever conceit, the guys at Rivalfish have come up with a comprehensive list of which celebrities look like which major sports team's logos. It sounds gimmick, and it kind of is, but they've certainly put in their research, as evidenced by the (not at ALL offensive!) Chief Nok-a-Homa / Tim Curr...
Not Much Hockey Left To Go
After last night's Stanley Cup Finals Game 4, an Anaheim victory over Ottawa to take a 3-1 series lead, it appears that the NHL will remain true to tradition: The Stanley Cup will be presented in Orange County. It seems as if there could have never been any other way....
There Has To Be A Way To Combine A Hockey Game And A Telethon
Hockey continues to feel the sting of disrespect from their network television home. This time, the slap in the face isn't national, but limited to just the Tampa market. For now, anyway. We'll have to wait and see what happens if tonight's game goes into overtime....
Carlos Zambrano Needs A Time Out
When you're 8 games below .500, the least you could do is try to be lovable. But the Cubs, 7.5 games out in the pathetic NL Central, can't even manage that....
NHL Fans Are That Much More Special Today
If you didn't watch the Stanley Cup Finals Game 2 last night — and of course you did — you might have missed this odd shot of Snoop Dogg, who, for reasons unbeknown to anyone but him (and probably not him either), was wearing a fake mustache....
The Otters Are No Longer Satisfied With Their Jug Band Christmas
Beware, everyone: The otters have finally had enough of centuries of human dominance and have banded together to destroy us. It was only a matter of time. We welcome our new otter overlords....
It Tastes Like The Back Of A LA School Bus
Ever wonder what it would be like to see Manny Ramirez savor the aroma of fine wine? (Manny, that's not grape juice ... Manny ... Manny ....) Get yourself to Yawkey Way tomorrow to see three Red Sox show off their new wines. It will be nice to see Schilling use a spit cup for something other than ch...
We Hope You Nailed The Exacta
At the Hollywood Park horse racing track over the weekend, they tried the above gimmick. Ignoring the rather disturbing "bikini women as racing animals" undertone — the runners don't even seem to have names, including "Blazin' Blondie" and "Kieska" — we can't quite get past the announcer's "most of ...
Stanley Cup Finals Pants Party: Ducks Vs. Senators
We're taking Memorial Day off, as you've surely noticed — though we're excited LeBron and the Jazz have given us something to pay attention to — but we are doing one post: A preview of the Stanley Cup Finals. They drop the puck tonight at 8 p.m. ET, with the Anaheim (Not Mighty) Ducks against the Ot...
Surprisingly, Norm Stewart Doesn't Speak Jive
Not that the black people in the video have anything to be particularly proud of, but ... Dear Lord, the white people. Coach Norm Stewart raps, and he's not the worst one. Greg Church, you're going to burn in hell for this....