in Page 3434 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Giants Rookie Conor Gillaspie Had A Very Rookie Inside-The-Park Homer Last Night (Video)
There are two things that make this—Conor Gillaspie's first major league home run—a very rookie home run: 1. The stumble and trip as he is waved home ( "Honestly, I was pretty embarrassed," he said after the game. "I didn't want to get up"); and 2. The fact that once he had made it home and set al...

Here's The "Wasted Man's Nightmare Stuck In A Funhouse" Video You Won't Regret Watching
The good folks over at Sharapova's Thigh sent along this mesmerizing footage of the most accurate depiction of a carnival-setting bad trip mine eyes have ever seen. It's the laughter. That judging laughter. Stop the kaleidoscopic mayhem....

After An 18-Second, 80-Yard Game-Winning Drive, Football Team Has To Answer To Guy In Banana Suit
In Minnesota small-college football circles, Augsburg College's stunning upset of St. John's University is being called "The Miracle in Collegeville." That's an apt name considering the game was played in Collegeville and anytime you engineer an 80-yard game-winning drive that starts with 18 secon...

Carlos Tevez Refused To Play In Manchester City's Champions League Match Today
Said Manchester City Coach Roberto Mancini after former team captain Carlos Tevez opted against heading into today's UEFA Champions League match against Bayern Munich, "For me, he's finished. I cannot go on with him. If I decide these things then he's finished. I have helped him and now he's refus...

So, Michelle Beadle Apparently Sucked On Linda Cohn's Leg Today
Two girls, one Nike product-placement victory. Per @SarahSpain, "Thank god @ESPN_Michelle had that rattlesnake training. Her Texas upbringing saved @lindacohn 's life." Aw. (H/T Obsessed With Sports)...

Deadspin Classic: A Prayer For Steve Bartman
Alex Gibney's film Catching Hell—about Cubdom's favorite scapegoat, Steve Bartman—aired tonight on ESPN. Last year, we adapted the following excerpt about Bartman from Will Leitch's book Are We Winning? Fathers and Sons and the New Golden Age of Baseball. Originally published May 4, 2010....

Today In Exploding Toilets News
"Authorities say a woman was taken to a local hospital after a toilet she was using exploded at the General Services Administration Building in Washington, D.C. Fire and EMS spokesman Pete Piringer says the woman has serious, but non-life-threatening injuries. Piringer says when D.C. Fire and EMS ...

This Evening: Let's Watch 10 Stadium Demolitions In A Row
Your p.m. roundup for Sept. 27, the day we learned red wine wasn't the blood-pressure cure we thought it was. H/T to Robert for the video. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Rory McIlroy And Caroline Wozniacki Give Themselves An Insufferable Couple Nickname: Wozzilroy
If you didn't know, now you now: tennis star Caroline Wozniacki and golf star Rory McIlroy have been dating for a few months. McIlroy recently made his love official by engraving a golf club with the name "Wozzilroy," which is what they have decided we will call them. We, obviously, have decided to ...

Watching The Bengals Can Be A Fate Worse Than Death, Says Dying Bengals Fan
"Accepting that the end was near, the funny grandfather and great-grandfather said earlier in the day there was an upside to death: at least he wouldn't have to watch another Bengals loss." [Sports Grid, via Cincinnati Enquirer]...

Screw You, And Screw Your Man Card
I don't know who invented the phrase "Turn in your man card," but whoever it is should be taken out in the street and have his balls stomped on by a fucking marching band. Every Sunday, I'm now subjected to some goddamn Miller Lite ad where the guys in it are like, "ZOMG! You're drinking a generic l...

The NFL's Evolution, As Measured By Dan Dierdorfisms
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

We Remind You Once Again That Dan Shaughnessy Is Putrid
Your letters:...

Rihanna's Bikini Top Offends Northern Ireland Farmer In Quaintest Dispute Ever
Well, this is adorable, and certainly newsworthy: Rihanna, who has probably worn a bikini top for ninety percent of her adult life, recently had "a conversation" with a Northern Ireland farmer named Alan Graham to discuss her wardrobe. As a result of the conversation, Rihanna will probably not wea...

Growing Up On NFL Violence In A Violent Neighborhood
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

A Cockroach! And It Was Crawling Across The Field At Cowboys Stadium!
Your morning roundup for Sept. 27, the day we feared the Uniboob. H/T for the video to Brian. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

The Cowboys Didn't Lose Last Night, But It Wasn't For Lack Of Trying
If you were watching the ESPN postgame last night you probably heard a lot about how Tony Romo and the Cowboys "dug deep." This is a nice way of crediting the winners of an ugly, sloppily played game, which I've reduced here to a few of its ugliest, most sloppily played moments. ...

The Irish Rugby Team Wins One For The Displaced
Chris Benz and Dave Shireley will be filing dispatches from the Rugby World Cup in New Zealand, in the odd moments that they are sober. For a rugby glossary and position guide, click here....

This Evening: Big Papi, Little Pee-Pee
Your p.m. roundup for Sept. 26, the day we learned about spontaneous human combustion. Photo via Mocksession; H/T to Brad. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Marvin Lewis Guarantees A Victory Over The Bills This Week, Because Why The Hell Not?
From the Bengals' head coach's press conference earlier today:...