in Page 3657 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Cockblocked by Snow! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
All The News That's Fit To Analogize Ridiculously To Food
Your food metaphor of the day, courtesy The New York Times: "We all know the cliché that a prosecuting attorney can persuade a grand jury to indict a ham sandwich, but Clemens — and Barry Bonds, with his trial scheduled for next March — are not mere ham sandwiches but rather the prime beef of baseba...
"When Their Panties're Moist, We'll Give 'Em The Finale": One Stud's Adventures In Deca And Male Stripping
Paul Solotaroff, the guy with the pecs in the above photo, lived through the age of muscle, which on one notable occasion found our hero shimmying for horny Long Island women, his dick in a Star of David rayon sling....
Violent Bike Collision Has Quick, Polite Resolution
A guy riding his bike with a shoulder-mounted camera hits an old man. Words are exchanged. Disputation seems inevitable. Then both graciously agree on their mutual culpability and move on. Moral: Old people need to watch where the fuck they're going....
Last Night's Winner: Jamie McCourt
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Jamie McCourt, recent divorcee and current possessor of Frank McCourt's balls in the batshit divorce case that gets batshittier by the day....
Teenage Poop Vandals Arrested At Ritzy Florida Hotel Pool
Surveillance cameras show one of the teens reaching into his pants, pulling out a turd, then having a poo party with his buddy. It will cost thousands of dollars to undoodie the damage. [ABCNews]...
'Hi, I'm Sidney And I'm Going To Get Tim Tebow Laid'
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...
Say Hello To Grandma Babs, Deadspin
Facebook contest winner Babs Claire has returned from her very special afternoon with Daulerio at Yankee Stadium. Her account, after the jump....
Greeks And Serbs Fight It Out On The Basketball Court, With Their Fists
The Acropolis Tournament in Athens ended today when the Greek and Serbian teams got into a bench-clearing brawl. Come for the punching, stay for the Nenad Krstic chair-throwing. [AP]...
Like Fencing, But With Sex Toys
Because when's the last time you saw someone get knocked out with a 7-pound dildo? [Video via here, music via Star Trek]...
Today In Incongruous Rap Anthems: Jordan Shipley
Everyone thank MC Howley for this loving tribute to Bengals rookie Jordan Shipley. H/T MKM...
Community College Baseball Player Has The Heart Of A Champion
Alec Cortez, of San Bernardino Valley College, sent this video to more than 100 schools, just looking for a chance to show of his skills. And what skills they are....
Dwyane Wade Thinks LeBron James Has Handled Himself Very Well This Summer
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Dwyane Wade. ...
Percy Harvin Collapses, Has Name Changed
Vikings all-everything Percy Harvin, suffering from a migraine during practice, vomited on the sidelines and collapsed. He was taken to a nearby hospital by ambulance and caused ESPN copy-editors to miss a typo which referred to Harvin as "Migraine." H/T six tipsters....
A Lesson In Dealing With Women Who Have Baby Fever
Your letters:...
The Oxford English Dictionary Now Being Interrupted With Buzzing Sound
Vuvuzelas have reached the big time, having been added to the newest edition of the OED along with such other words that we'll be using forever and ever as "staycation," "bromance," "chillax," and "interweb"—singular. [NYT]...
Chad Ochocinco Is A Hypocrite When It Comes To Dick Towels
Today Ochocinco Tweeted a picture of himself wearing a dick towel. So why did he refuse to be associated with one at the Super Bowl?...
Vin Scully Doesn't Understand Your Newfangled Haircut, Troy Tulowitzki
In the 6th inning of last night's Rockies-Dodgers game, Vin Scully decided to carefully examine Troy Tulowitzki's hairstyle after learning it is called a mullet, which to Scully had always been—and always will be—a type of fish. Listen. [Wezen-Ball]...
What Gets Wetter As It Dries, And Is Also A Giant Penis? Chad Ochocinco's Dick Towel
"Ladies only—after my surgery," he Tweets. I give it 0.7 Shiancoes. [TwitPic]...