in Page 3737 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

USA Eliminated By Croatia In Davis Cup Quarters
This is utterly shocking news to those who had no idea the Davis Cup was even going on right now. [UPI]...

If They Were Athletes: The Robots From <i>Mega Man II</i>
You've thought to yourself, "Y'know, those extremely agile and powerful Nintendo characters would be great at sports." But who would they be, if manifested in reality?...

This Was Not The Week For Ex-Athletes To Be At Odds With Lovers
On the day of Steve McNair's funeral, another sordid story comes to light as Arturo Gatti's wife has been detained as a result of the boxer's death....

Actually, All Tennis Looks Like This On A Sunday Morning
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

We Were Wrong. He Can Go Lower
Jose Canseco didn't fare so well against a real fighter. Now he'll try his luck boxing Bill "El Wingador" Simmons. That's not a nickname for the Sports Fella, it's a guy who eats for a living.[Celebrity Boxing Federation]...

Arturo Gatti Reported Killed In Brazil (Update)
Arturo "Thunder" Gatti, one of the most entertaining boxer of the decade, is being reported murdered in Brazil at the age of 37. Tracking, obviously. Sadly true. [Google Translator/CBC]...

Police A Little Pissed At Newest Mariner
Seattle learns after trading for Dan Cortes that the top pitching prospect was busted earlier this month for public urination. He'll fit right in. [Seattle PI]...

And You Thought Tony Parker Was Excited About The Richard Jefferson Trade
The Spurs guard was in Paris this week, celebrating his brother's birthday with a bottle of champagne worth more than my life. [Faded Youth Blog]...

Yeah, But You Still Have To Live In Pennsylvania
Quaker staters, use your hand to shield your eyes from your three championship trophies, together for the first time. And take your other hand out of your pants. [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette]...

Fred McGriff's and Bill James's Love Child Will Change The Game
Today, possibly even as you read this, a shadowy cabal of MLB executives, scientists and SABR nerds is meeting to decide the future of baseball. Who will survive the coming new world order? Here's a hint: Not Adam Dunn....

Nice, But He Still Gets An Asterisk For Doing It Against The Padres
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Teammate Is Totally Undermining Lance Armstrong
Alberto Contador unexpectedly moved into second, and the Tour de France suddenly went all Brandy vs. Monica. Lance: "Things didn't really go according to the plan we mapped out before. I was a little surprised, but it doesn't matter." [AFP]...

The Erin Andrews Chin Incident: A Reconstruction
What really happened on that fateful night when America's Sideline Princess was viciously attacked by flying baseballs? Just how bad were her injuries? Where was the ball boy/girl for protection? Why is there no video evidence? What are they hiding?!...

The One Where Jay Mariotti Shows Off His Formidable Lady-Killing Technique
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....

Sandwich Salesman Breaks World Record, Consummates Stalkerish Relationship
Michael Phelps claims one of the few records he doesn't already own, breaking Ian Crocker's mark in the 100-meter butterfly. "Phelps taped Crocker's picture on his bedroom wall for motivation six years ago, after Crocker set the record." [WaPo]...

Wait, Maybe Running With Bulls Isn't Such A Great Idea?
A 27-year-old Spaniard (not pictured) was gored to death, when a 1,130-pound bull (that's him there) broke loose from the Pamplona pack and went understandably crazy. It's the first goring death at the famous bull run in 14 years....

Coach's Foot Attacked by Deranged Panamanian Groin
Things got ugly during yesterday's match between Panama and Mexico. I'm not one for pointing fingers, but I'm guessing that the Mexican coach making for this guy's groin (while the ball was in play) didn't exactly defuse the situation....

NBA Playoffs + Unrelated Movie = Genius
At best it's a blunt instrument to pound LAND OF THE LOST into every NBA fan's head. At worst it's a weird attempt at subliminal persuasion. But we can all agree that those NBA Playoffs/summer movie crosspromotions are unbelievably annoying....

This Week In Terrible Music: The Cowboys’ Nu Metal Band, Plus Chickenfoot
You may have heard that Cowboys' o-lineman Marc Colombo, Leonard Davis, and Cory Procter started their own metal band called Free Reign. Is their music as awful as you think it is? SURE IS!...

Nationals And Pirates Combine To Make Pretty Decent Baseball Team
Houston and Washington had some unfinished business yesterday, wrapping up a suspended game that took two months, two cities and three teams to complete. And the winning pitcher got the decision while taking a nap in Philadelphia....