in Page 3738 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

RSS Readers Will Not Get To See Where This Telestrator Vagina Came From
Yes, yes — I know. Those of you reading this on RSS will probably only get a portion of this message and it will leave you wondering, "Hey, what the crap happened to the full Deadspin feed, those greedy basta..."...

Stephen Strasburg Performs Miracle Of Turning 27 Pitches Into Six Outs
Baseball Jesus Stephen Strasburg debuted today against the Tigers and pitched two scoreless innings. He gave up back-to-back two-out singles in the second, finished with a strikeout, and transubstantiated into Miguel Batista. [ESPN]...

Peter King Leads The League In Obliviousness, Strange Notions Of Justice (UPDATE)
Whenever a football story drifts beyond football and contracts and whatever Brett Favre just text-messaged from his ride mower, we can always count on Peter King to give voice to the most oblivious and casually insensitive thought in his head....

Amber Alert In Canada After Hockey Trading Cards Vanish
If an insured shipment of hockey trading cards is shipped from Newfoundland, when will it arrive in Ontario? Trick question; the post office will steal lose it. If you have any information, you know what to do. [UPI]...

Last Night's Winner: The Boston Yankees
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like ad sales software that scored another big success for targeted online marketing campaigns. Because who needs Yankee tickets more than the people of Boston?...

Get Your Head In The Game
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Cranky Old Sportscaster Unloads On Congress, Curling
Beano Cook is an American treasure, and nearly 66% of you agreed with that assessment about two years ago. From his rapier wit to his extensive knowledge of the game, Cook deserves our respect. But, let's have some fun instead....

Canadians Also Win Gold For Synchronized Peeing
The City of Edmonton charted water consumption during the hockey gold medal game and found that the whole damn town apparently saved its "business" for the intermissions. [Pat's Papers]...

Visiting Reporters Deemed Unworthy Of Watching The Yankees Play
The Steinbrenners require the best of everything, including a luxurious Spring Training field named for Papa George. You wouldn't know it if you're the visiting team's beat reporter, whose press pass ought to be marked "obstructed view."...

Erin Andrews Will Not Be Part Of ESPN's NFL Draft
As we know, ESPN's Erin Andrews will be part of this year's Dancing With The Stars and, according to ESPN, her appearance on the show shouldn't interfere with her other WWL duties. However: no green room this year....

Acting! Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the poor unappreciated working stiffs who get paid unconscionable sums to play make believe for a living. It's about time they got some attention....

Newcastle Signs Peter Parker, Goblin Attacks Up 32%
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Heartstring Plucking Jamaican Dogsled Movie Inevitably Coming To Theaters Near You
Move over, The Blind Side, the story of Newton Marshall is here to make your mother cry. Newton, an adversity overcoming Jamaican dogsled racer, begins the Iditarod today. But how good will the movie adaptation be?...

Where Business Is Always Good
Former major leaguer and current AAA coach Richie Hebner still digs graves and drives a hearse in the offseason. Good thing he's in the Orioles organization; he can dispose of Garrett Atkins's career. [Detroit News]...

When The Knicks Play The Nets, <em>Someone</em>'s Gonna Set An NBA Record
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Mike Minter Has Moonage Daydream
Former Panther's safety Mike Minter submits himself to a battery of tests to further fitness science- or visit dimensions far beyond the reaches of our telescopes....

The Ravens Have a Wide Receiver? Yes. The Ravens Have a Wide Receiver.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

<em>ESPN The Magazine</em> Flosses Rick Reilly®'s Column From Its Pages
We're told that Rick Reilly's next ESPN The Magazine column will be his last for the magazine, which means he will now annoy the world on only two ESPN media platforms instead of three. Progress!...

Tomorrow's Fight About More Than W-L To One Boxer
Of 30 kids in a boxing program in St. Louis's inner city, 9 are dead, 9 are in prison, and many of the rest joined gangs. Then there's Devon Alexander, world champion. [Sports Illustrated]...

Things So Bad For Ducks, They're Cheering For Huskies Now
Oregon fans gave Brandon Roy a standing ovation before last night's game. UW's Brandon Roy. Who was decked out in purple UW gear. What's wrong with this picture?...