in Page 3794 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Sammy Sosa Doesn't See Why People Are So Terrified By His Appearance
The formerly dark-skinned Sosa spoke out about his ghostly new look and he would like to let everyone know that he's not dying or anything: "It's a bleaching cream," he said. You don't say....
The Night They Drove The Dickheads Down
Ole Miss' band will stop playing one of the school's fight songs because some history-minded folk insisted on chanting "The South will rise again!" at the end. (Rise from what, exactly? Explosive population growth?) [Commercial Appeal]...
You Can't Drag Baseball Into The 21st Century
Like many others, I assumed that Major League Baseball would have no choice but to cave in and expand the use instant replay this offseason, but I underestimated the league's commitment to completely ignoring public opinion at all times....
An Apt Metaphor For The Raiders Season?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
SEC Refs Are Afraid Of Technology. Like, 1990s Technology.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Bobby Bowden Acts His Age, Forgets Score
Bowden may not remember what happened two quarters ago, but he remembers when FSU was good. That used to be enough for boosters, but after a mental lapse quite in character with an octogenarian, who knows....
He Got You, My Pretty
Former Wisconsin Badger Darin Schubring lost a bar fight was sucker-punched by a man wearing a Flying Monkey costume. That's slightly more embarrassing than being referred to, 25 years later, as "Baraboo local legend." But only slightly. [Baraboo News Republic]...
Upon Further Review, Baseball Is Stupid
Baseball won't be expanding instant replay anytime soon, because baseball doesn't want its outcomes to be an accurate reflection of what transpires on the field so much as an expression of the yearnings in Tim McClelland's heart....
You Better Learn To Recognize Michigan's AD, Honey
Since picking on Rich Rodriguez has become a little too easy lately, here's a new plotline for Michigan mockers to pursue....athletic director Bill Martin reduced to pulling the "Do you know who I am?" routine in his own stadium....
The Clemson Women's Rowing Team About To Become Famous For All The Wrong Reasons
And that's...start again. And there's...no. Sigh. These poor girls. Nice win at the Hooch, though! [ClemsonTigers.cstv]...
Michael Phelps Wears "Old-Style" Swimsuit And Facial Hair, Suddenly Sucks
"Sporting a beard and an old-style swimsuit, Michael Phelps missed out on two finals and barely qualified for a third Tuesday at a World Cup short-course meet." [AP]...
A Few Million Pesos Later, Angel Villalona Is A Free Man, For Now
Angel Villalona, the Giants prospect accused of fatally shooting a man in his native Dominican Republic, is out on bail and out 2 million pesos, too, having reportedly paid the victim's family to drop charges against him. That's $55,000....
I Loved It. It Was Much Better Than "The Bengals"
Broadway is producing a play about the life of Vince Lombardi. Because the only thing liberal East Coast elitst theatergoers love more than football is people from Wisconsin. [WSOCTV]...
Marat Safin Says Agassi Is "Stupid", Should "Shut Up"
Tennis-playing dude Marat Safin isn't exactly broken up over revelations that fellow competitor Andre Agassi was addicted to crank. If he feels so bad about it now, Safin says, then why not give back all that money he didn't win?...
He'll Never Be Banned From The Gambling Hall of Fame
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Desperate Redskins Fans Export Angry Sign Holding Jobs
Since Generalissimo Snyder has banned all forms of public expression with his eyesight, Washington fans who wished to mock him were forced to drive to Atlanta just to put bags over their head and look sad....
Hey, Look At That! It's College Basketball Season!
Funny how it sneaks up on you, huh? The regular season begins in fitting fashion tonight as the defending champs take on Isiah Thomas in a game he didn't want to coach and no one else wants to watch. Beautiful....
The Handwringing Over Jeremy Tyler's Foreign Adventure Has Begun
Jeremy Tyler left high school to play professionally in the Holy Land, where the plan was to do a credible Kevin Garnett impression and expose the folly of the minimum-age rule. The plan was not to play like Oliver Miller....
Stephen A. Smith's Return To Print Is Imminent?
After messy arbitration hearings with the Philadelphia Inquirer, it appears the beleaguered paper will announce the unwelcome return of ALL CAPS column-writing. Yes, Stephen A. will be "back on staff" again very, very soon, sources say. Sock? Still retired....
“My Coach Broke My Collarbone.” Your First Edition Of A-HOLE COACH DIGEST
I've been thinking about terrible coaches lately. Coaches that are not merely incompetent, but also paranoid, megalomaniacal, and prickish. Coaches that are praised for having such qualities, particularly at the college and high school levels....