in Page 3975 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Media Approval Ratings: Jeanne Zelasko
If you were in attendance at Citizens Bank Ballpark last night, the first voice you may have heard over the loudspeaker after your team won the championship was that of Jeanne Zelasko. And while I have nothing against Jeanne Zelasko personally, I’m not exactly sure she was the right person to have ...
Perhaps More Philadelphians Should Consider Mass Transit
From Upstate Underdog at Walk Off Walk comes this video of Philly fans joyfully destroying an automobile in the wake of last night's victory. And really, if you were dumb enough to park your damn car in the city proper last night, don't you pretty much deserve to have it flipped and stomped on? I...
Thursday Night Preview: #23 South Florida at Cincinnati
In keeping with the theme of the day, once the ESPN Thursday night programmer took a shit and put it into his ESPN issued lunchbox (the graphic on the lunchbox was Stuart Scott's lazy eye and the eye followed you when it moved.)Anyway, then the ESPN programmer collected Lou Holtz's spit and mixed i...
Great Moments In Sports Poop History: Awful Announcing
And now for the second entry in greatest sports blogging series of all time. This sports poop story comes to us from Brian Powell at Awful Announcing, who drops this steaming deuce of a tale on us. “Back in the wild and crazy late 90s, I was a D-1 NCAA athlete at a small institution just north of B...
The Deadspin Polygraph Test! Will Leitch!
Welcome to the Deadspin Polygraph Test, where I choose a random person in the sports world and subject them to a series of embarrassing and deeply personal questions, almost all of which involve sex or poop. They can only answer yes or no. Now, I don’t posses an actual polygraph machine here. So I’...
Boston Fans And Players Keeping It Classy As Fackin’ EVAH!
Hey, here’s a charming picture from the Celtics ring ceremony on Tuesday night. On the left is current Celtic, drug-doer, and student of the Norv Turner Institute Of Skin Care, Scot Pollard. Scot is flashing his championship ring, because the Celts certainly couldn’t have won a title without the th...
Great Moments In Sports Poop History: Mike Florio
We all have our unfortunate poop stories. As you may or may not know, I once pooped my pants while out on the golf course. There was also the one time I woke up in my NYC apartment after a long night of drinking only to discover a Big Daddy Drew shitpattie stuck to the inside of my shorts. Surely, ...
Your Guest Editor Has Arrived. Get All Your Balls In Order.
All right, you listen up, you little freaks. The fun stops here: you're going to shut your stinking traps and behave, dammit! This is one substitute you're not going to SCREW WITH! That's right, I'm your guest editor today. Send your tips to me here, or to [email protected]. And while I'm here, in ...
Cops Still Baffled By Isiah Thomas' Tomfoolery
We'll probably never know what really happened last Friday night at Isiah Thomas' spacious pad in Purchase, New York, but the one thing that is being made perfectly clear: he's the one who overdosed on sleeping pills, not his daughter, and police chief, David Hall, is doing everything possible to ma...
Greg Oden's Body Hates Him
Well, it's a good thing Greg Oden has that creaky knee back in proper working order. That way, the Portland Trail Blazers' medical staff can focus their full attention on his latest injury: A "sprained" foot. I'll give Oden this much: He’s already been more durable than he was last season. After all...
30 Previews In 30 Days: The Utah Jazz
The NBA season has started! But, like, we still have two previews to go! Up next is a team that loves the pick-and-roll...and quiet evenings at home. They are: The Utah Jazz. When last we saw them: Finished 54-28, first in the Northwest Division and fourth overall in the West. Lost to the Lakers in ...
Loaded Feature Stories That Make It Abundantly Clear Why Newspapers Suck
Yes, that's Brett Myers, Phillies number two pitcher, who many of you only know as the man who punched his wife in the face outside a Boston bar back in June of 2006. Given his penchant for violence and dickheaded outbursts, it would seem completely ridiculous for a newspaper to do a feature story o...
Morning Blogdome: An Acta Faith
You should write to [email protected]. It misses you. • Good grief, Chuck: Everyone deals with the end of baseball season in their own way. Carving graven images of Manny Acta isn't high on the list, but you do what you gotta do. [We've Got Heart] • It's going to be a long winter: Does a Konerk...
Houston, We Have A Compound Fracture
As someone old enough to remember seeing "The Theisman Incident" on live TV, I like to consider myself an aficionado of horrifying bone-melting leg injuries. If you were watching the gridiron donnybrook between Houston and Marshall last night—and really, why would you be?—you witnessed one that will...
Cutler's Beirut Arm Is Stronger Than Elway's
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap "These pictures were taken @ the Tin Roof in Nashville where Jay Cutler spent homecoming. I guess Jay took the 10-7 loss to Duke pretty hard and wanted to show off his Beirut skill...
ESPN Deems Bill Simmons' Fantasy Basketball Entrant NSFW
The Big Lead hopped on this story (via Hank Brockett) earlier today about ESPN forbidding Bill Simmons from having adult entertainer/blogger/ESPN fan boy Christian, of Christian Sings the Blues (NOT ANYWHERE CLOSE TO BEING SAFE FOR WORK), in his fantasy basketball league (along with roto dungeon mas...
New Guitar Hero Ad Gives You A Whole New Reason To Hate Tom Cruise
We mentioned this only in passing last week, because a) it was Friday afternoon, b) we didn't have an embeddable version of the video yet, and c) it's pretty embarrassing for everyone involved, including the viewer. You've probably seen Alex Rodriguez, Tony Hawk, Michael Phelps and Kobe Bryant bring...
Danyelle Sargent Is Trying to Put All of This Behind Her
Fox sportscaster and potty-mouthed vixen Danyelle Sargent went on Dan Patrick's SI radio show this morning, sounding beleaguered and contrite for her embarrassing Bill Walsh slip-up that unfortunately made the airwaves on Sunday and unleashed the wrath of Mike Francesa. This is her quote from Patric...
Charles Barkley Realizes Isiah Thomas Suicide Jokes Don't Play Well at Press Conferences
Charles Barkley, loudmouth TNT NBA analyst and potential 2014 gubernatorial nominee, may have finally crossed his own arbitrary tastelessness line. Barkley, commenting on the current state of the Knicks at a press conference, made this unfortunate quip about his old buddy Isiah Thomas, who recently ...
Hockey Player Pulls Off Rare Hat Trick, Has His Stick Taken Away
Brace yourselves: This is not a hockey post. It's a college hockey post. And it's not even a Michigan State college hockey post—although I'm sure I'll find a way to work a few dozen of those in before the CCHA season is over—but when any athlete pulls off something that has happened maybe twice in t...