in Page 4052 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Corey Lynch Offers Divine Intervention To The Bengals
Marvin Lewis has the seemingly insurmountable task of changing the Bengals' from one of the most clink-happy and character-deprived football teams in league history to something ... better. Chris Henry is gone, but the scars still remain. The attitude and atmosphere has to change in 2008, so the Ben...
Isaiah Rider Continues Excelling On Fast Track To Life Imprisonment
Former UNLV great and NBA troublemaker Isaiah (nee J.R.) Rider is back in trouble with the man THE MAN again, after he skipped out on his arraignment hearing , according to TMZ. Rider was supposed to report to court to deal with this whole mess, but missed it for reasons unknown at this time. (My gu...
Support Competitive Eating As An Olympic Sport!
We know, we know: None of you care about competitive eating as much as we do. That still doesn't make this plea to make competitive eating an Olympic sport any less inspired....
Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around
Many Deadspin readers were probably introduced to Pat Jordan's work thanks to his Jose Canseco piece that was published here. If you looked a little closer at some of the other stories he'd penned in the past, you may have realized you'd read one of his stories before. Some of Jordan's best work is ...
Media Approval Ratings: Michael Wilbon
Watching the NBA Playoffs the last week or so, it's clear Michael Wilbon has appropriately recovered from his mild heart attack last January. And did you know that his wife gave birth just two months later? Nice work, Wilbon!...
Reviewing The NFL Draft, As If Anybody Knows Anything
Some "experts" — you know, the people who decide who did a great job in a draft mere hours after it was completed and before, uh, anyone so much as puts on more than a hat — were up on the New England Patriots' selections at the NFL Draft this weekend. We couldn't tell you, but we did love any and a...
A Kiper-McShay Draft Day Hair Trade
The shocking Mel Kiper-Todd McShay follicle swap [The Sports Hernia]...
Bron-Shawn Basketball Beef Gets Hip-Hop Glaze
With Game 4 of the Wizards-Cavs series about to tip off in the Verizon Center comes the news via The Washington Post's (Boooooooo!) Wizards Insider blog that the overcooked rivalry between LeBron James and DeShawn Stevenson has extended into the hip-hop arena. It all started with Queen James waving ...
About Last Night...
What you missed while buying Pierre the penguin a new sports car......
Message To This Kid's Future Defense Attorney: Blame Name or Haircut
This unfortunate youngster, other than being forced by parental duress to sport the bowl cut, was born unto a couple of deranged Spurs fans. How unhinged, exactly? Instead of buying a team photo or something to encapsulate their love for the team, they decided to put the whole roster into their kid'...
1st Round, Nineteenth Overall: Panthers Select Jeff Otah
Let's measure the Otah draft buzz throughout his career in decibels (dB): 1) Leaves JUCO as a lanky ex-basketball player; wins starting job at Pitt (10 dB; rustling leaves) 2) Stones Chris Long repeatedly in Virginia-Pitt game (70 dB; Space Shuttle launch in your kitchen) 3) Suffers minor injury in...
1st Round, Eighteenth Overall: Ravens Select Joe Flacco
Joe Flacco came from a bad neighborhood. Audubon, New Jersey, is rougher than the Little Rock with East St. Louis piled on top of it. Flacco graduated from Audubon High School, which is so rough that there are medal detectors in the faculty lounge, where even the math teachers are pumped up muscle m...
1st Round, Sixteenth Overall: Buzzsaw Selects Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie
You better adjust the tracking on your VCR if you want to watch game tape of Rodgers-Cromartie. Tennessee State games are taped using the surveillance cameras at the Stop & Rob across the street. "The tape is not real clear. You have to find him. This reminds me of an older time in scouting," accor...
1st Round, Fifteenth Overall: Chiefs Select Branden Albert
Oh God. The Lions made a trade. Carl Peterson dangled a shiny object in front of Matt Millen, and now we all have to adjust. This Brandon Albert blog entry will be written in four styles: dense football scouting jargon, lyrically idiotic Jamie Dukes banter, Thomas the Tank Engine narration, and fin...
1st Round, Thirteenth Overall: Panthers Select Jonathan Stewart
Okay, where's Tanier going here? Is going to go the "Jon Stewart" route and make lots of Daily Show (or "The Faculty") references? Is he going to make fun of Oregon's Rejected Nickelodeon Teen Superhero uniforms? Maybe go old school for some Jimmy Stewart references? ...
1st Round, Eleventh Overall: Bills Select Leodis McKelvin
Oh where do parents find names like "Leodis"? Well, smart guy, it turns out that Leodis was the Olde English name for the woods that eventually became the English township of Leeds. The word "Leodis" is mentioned several times by the Venerable Bede, and there are few sources as venerable as the Ven...
1st Round, Ninth Overall: Bengals Select Keith Rivers
Keep standing pat, ye mighty Bengals! The Jags and Pats leapt over you to take defenders you so badly needed, guys you targeted so heavily that you sent your line coach to molest them at their pro days. Your star wide receiver plans to toilet paper team headquarters. Your other receiver, whose name...
1st Round, Seventh Overall: Patriots Saints Select Sedrick Ellis
The Patriots, wheeling and dealing? Next thing you know they'll be doing something shifty. Without waiting for the details, I am going to assume that they just took the Saints first round picks thru 2017 to allow them to move up five slots....
1st Round, Fifth Overall: Chiefs Select Glenn Dorsey
The big question in March was whether Dorsey had super-secret-surgery on his balky knees. How secret surgery even possible? I can't get a hemorrhoid removed without six referrals and a signed affidavit from the president of my insurance company. But somehow one of the top NFL prospects can sneak in...
1st Round, Second Overall: Rams Take Chris Long
Did you know that Chris Long is Howie Long's son? No kidding! The media really has been doing a swell job keeping that tidbit under wraps. Yes, Long is the scion of the Hall of Fame lineman and impeccably-coiffed FOX analysis android. Howie Long was so spectacular in his playing days that a pass ru...