in Page 4088 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Rick Ankiel, Six Years Later
As we await tonight's hopefully-not-rained-out NCLS Game 1, we think back to 2000, when the Cardinals and Mets last met under these circumstances. This is known, of course, as the Rick Ankiel series, when the blistering lefthander, whose curveball was one of the most gravity-defying things we had ...

What Could Possibly Go Wrong With This Idea?
Yahoo's Time Capsule Project begins today, in which people from around the world are encouraged "to submit text, images and video that reflect human nature" to be included in a message that will be beamed into space. So that the world of sports isn't left out, we are submitting the video above, whic...

Steinbrenner's Agonizing "Decision"
We have trouble with the concept of "soul-searching" when it comes to George Steinbrenner — he seems to have a key ingredient missing — but evidently the Yankee owner did some heavy thinking over the past two days. According to the New York Post, Steinbrenner has apparently decided not to fire ma...

Steve Young Can't Take It Anymore
We're sure, in the wake of a ridiculous $1.7 billion dollar deal, the folks at YouTube won't let this stand very long, but if you watched "SportsCenter" this morning, you say Michael Irvin — shockingly! — ramble on like, well, a retard for about five minutes about why the Ravens belonged in the top ...

Recruiting Makes College Sports Double Plus Unfun
As a fan of college athletics, we will confess to being depressed by the process of recruiting. Some fans are obsessed with it, subscribing to scouting services and reading tea leaves, analyzing every vocal inflection of a 17-year-old kid as if it's going to be an insight to their deeper mindset. (T...

Parents Sentence Son To Lifetime Of Ass-Kickings
As The Mighty MJD mentioned on Sunday, Leann and Rusty Real of D'Iberville, Miss., have named their kid ESPN Montana Real. That's pronounced "Espen," as in, "Mrs. Johnson! The other boys have run Espen's pants up the flagpole again!"...

Albert Pujols, In A Proud And Photogenic Moment
We're as pleased as anyone by the Cardinals' series-clinching victory over the Mets Padres last night, but, honestly, they really shouldn't allow still cameras to take pictures of the postgame celebrations. They inevitably lead to photographs that are, well, uncomfortable to look at. (Though we appr...

The Happy Italian Vegetarian Lawyer Genius Elf
As we celebrate our Cardinals' advancement to the National League Championship Series, we are reminded once again, from this photo, that no one knows how to party like Tony LaRussa....

NFL Week Five, Update #1
• The Tennessee Titans, eighteen-and-a-half point underdogs, could be in the process of pulling off the upset of the freakin' decade. They lead the Colts 10-0 at the half, behind a beautiful Vince Young touchdown run and a secondary that's held Peyton Manning to 56 yards, and Marvin Harrison without...

NFL Awards Chris Henry More Free Time
From Buck O'Neil... to Chris Henry....

Week In Deadspin: Gotta Support The Team!
• GOOOO WILDCATS!!! • Do not playl Madden with these people, ever. • Official Drink Like A Champion garb. • Aren't you glad we brought this video back into your lives? • We just missed Pac Man Jones' shindig. • Anything fun going on in Philadelphia this weekend? • Your gambling days are just about o...

Live Playoff Blog: Twins Vs. A's, Game Three
Say what you will about this little postseason tournament, but we've learned one thing: When you're in the ALDS that doesn't feature the Yankees, you play a heckuva lot of day games. This is Game 3 of the A's-Twins series, and we've now live-blogged all three of them. We know these teams a little ...

Thank God For The Rain To Wash The Trash Off The Sidewalk
Now we see this clearly. Our whole life is pointed in one direction. There has never been a choice for us....

Your Friday Cross Dressing/She-Male Roundup
If you know us, you're familiar with our usual gripe: It's getting so that you can't stage a simple dragon-boat racing competition these days without someone breaking the rules by cross dressing. From Reuters:...

The Brave Soldiers Of The Smoking Gun
This here is Joe Morgan. No, obviously, not that Joe Morgan; this is Joe Morgan, an 18-year-old kid who was arrested with aggravated sexual abuse in Peoria, Illinois. He's part of The Smoking Gun's all-star lineup of mugshots of people with famous baseball players' names. Our favorite is Bobby Bon...

The Pacers Have Had A Busier Morning Than You
So, you know how the Indiana Pacers have been trying to change their image and become more fan-friendly and less, uh, crime-y?...

Well, Look Who's Back!
That's right, folks: You thought the beat slowed down, but with Clinton Portis, the beat just don't slow down....

Live Playoff Blog: Padres Vs. Cardinals, Game 2
All right, so after doing this live blog of a Cardinals game thing on Tuesday, it's pretty clear now that our hearts can't take it. It's difficult enough for us to survive watching these games; we can't actually be expected to type about them. Therefore, we're handing over the live-blogging chores t...

No One Doesn't "Just Say No" More Than The Bengals
For the Rob Gordons of the world out there, few experiences are more satisfying than sifting through old record bins. We once found that famous William Shatner car crash LSD record ... and that was just in our parents' basement....

Stop The World, We Want To Get Off
If there were any real cosmic justice out there, stories such as this would not be allowed to happen; a wise, all-knowing God, concerned only with the greater good, would hurl a giant meteor right directly into our equator first. But ours is a stark, lonely universe, devoid of reason, and we are p...