inf Page 36 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

There's Nothing More Annoying Than A Rays Fan With A Cowbell
OK, first of all, Cowbell Kid may seem pretty impressive when he's among his own in Tropicana Field, but I'd like to see him tearing down banners and clanging his bell at Fenway ... or Yankee Stadium, for that matter. Can Cowbell Kid win on the road? That's the question. As for the Rays, they've ans...

Dance The Night Away With The Ft. Myers Miracle
Time to put down your drink, turn up the music (it''s Shining Star by Earth Wind and Fire, I believe) and step to the rhythm of Minor Enterprise. Come on, who's dancing?...

Fun At the Preakness
Near as anyone could tell, today's game of beer-can volleyball broke out when someone flung a brew from on top of an outhouse. That, the surrounding masses realized, looked like jolly good fun. And soon the sky filled with silver-and-foam, the silver signifying surprisingly heavy vessels of lite bee...

Guys And Dolls: Floyd, White Sox Back On Top
The inflatable sex doll community was shocked on Tuesday night when Chicago's Gavin Floyd once again lost a no-hitter in the late going; giving up a double to the Twins' Joe Mauer with one out in the ninth. (Inset: "Nooooo!"). Bobby Jenks came on to get the final two outs in the White Sox's 7-1 vic...

Inside the Infield at Churchill Downs
Just because you don't really give a crap about horse racing doesn't mean you shouldn't be enjoying yourself like the happy-go-lucky types at the OTB. The Kentucky Derby is really just one huge ass party divided in two parts. The rich guys and southern belles cougars wear their most ridiculously ex...

Hipsters In Big Wheels — A Regressive Delight
Bring Your Own Big Wheel, an annual event for wacky funsters to relive the childhood they never left is typically held on San Francisco's winding Lombard Street. This year's event went down Easter Sunday on Potrero Hill, which The Backyard said is probably more treacherous. Not being from the Bay A...

Presenting The Deadspin Food Pyramid
Reading this site is hungry work. So, inspired by the Deadspin Pyramid of Success which you saw on Wednesday, we now give you the Deadspin Food Pyramid: Everything you will need to make smart nutritional choices at home, at work and at play! Approved by the Food and Drug Administration*, and smart ...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Snack Time Down At The Lagoon
S adly, this was the final photo entry in Bob's vacation album....

Woe Is The Illini
The Tennessee State Tigers are 4-8, with losses to Belmont, Akron, Colorado State and Southeast Missouri State. It was once known as the Tennessee State Agricultural and Industrial State Normal School for Negroes. Oprah Winfrey went there. And yesterday, they beat our Illini at the Assembly Hall in ...

Brigham Da Noise, Brigham Da Funk
We've been fortunate so far that most of the bowl games have given us actual watchable football. Sure, while many of the games are devoid of tradition ("New Mexico! It's ... culture!") but so what? The way the bowl system is set up, fans normally bludgeoned with story after story of Tim Tebow and Le...

Who's Sorry Now? Goofed Up National Anthem Edition
If you've never had your penis regaled in song, well, you don't know just how inspiring that can be. British singer Tony Henry was belting out the Croatian National Anthem before the recent European Championship 2008 soccer match with England, but botched the lyrics, with hilarious results....

Uncovering The 19th Century Version Of 'You Dead, Dawg'
Well, this just makes me miss Deadwood all the more: It seems that raunchy language was such a problem in professional baseball in the late 1800s, that the league actually handed out a document telling players to knock it off. It lists several examples of banned expressions, which are absolutely fil...

Peterson Breaks Rushing Record, Transubstantiates
Forget about rookie records, Adrian Peterson is going after bigger game. It's taken Minnesota's first-year wunderkind a mere eight attempts to break the NFL's record for rushing in a game. The 296 yard eruption led the Vikings to a 35-17 flattening of the San Diego Chargers and put Peterson over the...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while locking yourself in your bathroom, reading the minutes from last week's Porn Club meeting... • 7 p.m. — Drag Racing: NHRA Auto Club of Southern California finals, Pomona, California. Ahh! which way do I turn? Which way do I turn? [ESPN2] • 8 p.m. — NCAA Football: SMU at Houston. ...

Yes, That's Right, It's An NHL Closer
• Caliendo Can't Impersonate Him. Learn well, kids. When you have a choice between shooting at the goal and not shooting at the goal ... shoot at the goal. This was where I failed miserably in youth sports. But John Madden knew better, and decided against clearing the puck on a power play. His lack-...

Non-Football Sports On TV (And NFL Coverage Maps)
• 12 noon — Golf: Presidents Cup, Final Round [NBC] • 1:00 p.m. — Bowling: Women's U.S. Open [ESPN] • 1:00 p.m. — Movie: Top Gun [Spike] • 2:00 p.m. — NASCAR: LifeLock 400, at Kansas Speedway [ABC] • 2:00 p.m. — MLB: Braves at Astros [TBS] • 2:00 p.m. — MLB: Tigers at White Sox [WGN]...


Deadspin Film School Continues
Our other two films so far, both made on behalf of Ned, are here (by Proffessor Jerkwheat) and here (by Chad Sexington). We had no idea there was such filmmaking talent amongst the comments, and it's clear that at some time in the near future we're going to have to have a Deadspin Film Festival....

Yao Ming's Fantasy Wedding
Rockets center Yao Ming got himself hitched yesterday — or today, or whatever the hell the time change makes the actual date — in front of 70 onlookers and about 100 media people hanging out in the lobby waiting for interviews. It must be so odd to have people wanting to interview you after your wed...