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Jason Chimera's Nose Got Toasted Last Night
Washington Capitals forward Jason Chimera went to hit Detroit's Brendan Smith in the first period of last night's game, but he ended up hitting his face on Smith's helmet. The result was a very busted nose for Chimera....

Why Did Madison Bumgarner Get The Save And Not The Win?
Caveat: this couldn't possibly matter less. It's a footnote to a footnote. The win is the most arbitrary and least informative stat in baseball, rivaled only by the save. But the decision to grant Madison Bumgarner a win, and then to reverse course nearly an hour after the final out, is worth examin...

The SEC Really Does Benefit From Media Bias In Polls
This past week, four of the top five teams in the Associated Press College Football Poll hailed from the SEC West Division. Nebraska coach Bo Pelini, among others, wondered aloud whether ESPN's ownership of the brand-new SEC network, which launched this year, might be responsible for such a coinci...

Yes, Sliding Into First Can Be Faster; No, You Still Shouldn't Do It
Last night's Game 7 saw the first replay reversal in the World Series, at the tail end of Joe Panik's ridiculous double play. It was a huge play by Panik—the difference between first and third with no outs and bases empty two outs in a one-run game—made possible by replay. It was also made possibl...

I Love It When You Call Me Big Papa
Found this over at Longform: The New Yorker's legendary 1950 Lillian Ross profile of Hemingway:...

You Have To See These Indonesian Soccer Dudes Throw This Match
Words like "unbelievable" are thrown around too often in sports, but the highlight video above and especially the extended clips below of two Indonesian soccer teams throwing a match is exactly what the word unbelievable was meant to express. But then you realize that they're doing so to maybe save ...

Here's T-Pain Singing His Ass Off Without Auto-Tune
T-Pain was and is entertaining—and T-Pain was and is important—not just because he built a career a decade ago by making fun, light songs about drinking and/or having sex with women, but because of how he did it. He utilized and popularized Auto-Tune, and in doing so transformed both rap and R&B, pa...

Florida State Just Taking A Stroll In Front Of Joe's Crab Shack
We've given Florida State its share of grief today, but it's important to remember that not all scandals are created equal. There are felonies, and there are misdemeanors (though college football coverage often swirls those two together like mixers in a glass). There are the ones that make you say, ...

This Is The Problem With Saying "Redskins" On TV
OK, so it's an ad, and as a rule we don't participate in advertising campaigns. We're making an exception here, though, because the commercial above quietly makes a good point that we made bluntly not too long ago, about the normalization of a racial slur....

High School Quarterback Blows Play-In Game In Worst Way Imaginable
Spanish Fork High School had the lead and the ball in the final seconds of a play-in game against Maple Mountain, and was well on its way to the Utah state tournament. With Maple Mountain out of timeouts, Spanish Fork decided to run a play on fourth down and run off the six seconds remaining on the ...

Clippers Release Video To Remind Us Donald Sterling Isn't The Owner
Yesterday, the Los Angeles Clippers released a new hype video to start the new season. The message: Buy tickets and come to our games, because Donald Sterling doesn't own the team anymore!...

DeSean Jackson Will Catch Deep Balls No Matter Who Throws To Him
Washington has started three quarterbacks this season in an effort to find one that works. It's been terrible. Despite the shuffling, one offensive player hasn't been affected much at all: DeSean Jackson, the big-play receiver with the busted quarterbacks, has kept busting up defenses. ...

Missing Broncos Fan "Had His Fill Of Football," Tried To Hitchhike Home
Police have located Paul Kitterman, a 53-year-old man from Kremmling, Col. who disappeared while attending last Thursday's Broncos game. He was found in Pueblo, Col., which is about 100 miles away from Denver....

Kobe And Dwight Howard Talk Shit To Each Other, Get Double Technicals
Dwight Howard left the Lakers a season ago, but because of Kobe Bryant's achilles injury, the two haven't played against each other since their ill-fated partnership blew up in everybody's face. If you thought things between the two were all good, well, you don't know Kobe Bryant very well....

Report: Gordie Howe Suffered "Serious" Stroke
Red Wings legend Gordie Howe suffered a stroke early Sunday morning in Texas, according to The Detroit News. Howe, 86, is now out of the hospital and recuperating in Lubbock at his daughter's house. His son told the paper that, while Howe is having significant physical issues, his mind is doing bett...

Foods That Taste Good But Aren’t Shitty For You: A Matrix
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we're covering voodoo, Papa John, handcuffing, and more....

Report: Kings Owner Pitched A 4-On-5 Defense With One Cherrypicker
If you're a basketball fan, you've probably already read Zach Lowe's tiered NBA rankings. If you're not, toward the bottom there's an aside about a wonderfully wackadoo bit of proposed strategy that might turn you into a fan....

Liverpool Still Rely On A Player They No Longer Have
On Saturday, Liverpool dominated midtable side Hull City, but couldn't find the back of the net. Though they came close to stealing all three points with a late flurry, the match finished a scoreless draw. It was Liverpool's best performance of a nightmare week....

Tampa Bay's Overtime Fumble Was The Most Costly Fuckup In Week 8
After receiving the ball to start overtime, Tampa Bay could have ended the game with a touchdown drive. But Tampa tight end Austin Seferian-Jenkins fumbled on the first scrimmage play of overtime, and Minnesota linebacker Anthony Barr returned the fumble for a touchdown, which ended the game and...

LSU's Defense Dominated In Critical Situations This Week
Although Ole Miss quarterback Bo Wallace was shut down through much of Saturday's game against LSU, he had two chances late in the game to lead his team to victory. However, LSU's defense stopped both of Ole Miss' late drives and accounted for two of the most impactful plays of the week, according...