ing Page 1338 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Sportscaster Wants A Do-Over: "Son Of A Bitch. One More Time. Start It Over. Ready?"
But Craig Smylie of JET 24 in Erie, Pa., was on live done in by an editor who queued up the wrong footage from the night before at that moment when this aired early Thursday morning....

Tim Tebow Had A "Dinner Date" With Taylor Swift
Big news from Page Six today: white America's two favorite savants might be having a thing....

Why You Should All Be Watching HBO's Brilliant <em>On Freddie Roach</em> Docuseries
Sports documentaries tend to adhere to a certain formula: tremendous amounts of archival footage plus talking heads. If you're Ken Burns, you mix in some banjo music. Sometimes you get the subject to reminisce about a time in his life that is still of abiding interest to sports fans, and maybe, if...

Sadly, Albert Belle Could Not Drop Father Time With A Forearm On The Basepaths
Quick, guess how old Albert Belle is, without looking it up. He's 45. This is what happens when you chug coffee like water and are angry all the time....

Comments Of The Fortnight-Ish: Your Racist Jokes Are The Pee-Pee In Our Coke
In recent articles on commenting we've discussed freshness and originality, and now, having tackled those, we're prepared to move on to the slightly weightier topic of race relations in Western culture. Well, not quite. But we are going to talk about racist jokes....

Ryan Braun's Urine Collector Gives His Side Of The Story
Everyone has a lawyer, and everyone has a statement. Today's comes from Dino Laurenzi, Jr., the employee of Comprehensive Drug Testing responsible for collecting Ryan Braun's sample, and he'd like to clear up just what happened on that fateful October evening....

Lawsuit Over Bursting Testicle Alleges Professional Wrestling Is Fake
J-Millz's Coliseum Championship Wrestling match against Guido Andretti ended last June when Andretti kicked him in the nuts. Now J-Millz, whose real name is John Miller, is suing Andretti, whose real name is Clinton Woosley. Miller says his testicle burst as a result of the blow and that he doesn't...

NASCAR Drivers Spent Yesterday's Daytona 500 Rain Delay Mentioning Their Sponsors As Much As Possible
This will surprise absolutely nobody familiar with the constant shilling for products and sponsors that takes place before, during, and after NASCAR races, but when slapped together back-to-back it's worth realizing that yesterday's eventual postponement of the Daytona 500 wasn't a lost cause for...

Some Dude Won The Fort Worth Marathon By Six Minutes, But Was DQed Because He Didn't Register
Oklahoman Scott Downard easily won the Cowtown Marathon, in Fort Worth, with a time of 2:31:40. He outran the rest of the field by more than six minutes, so there was plenty of time to disqualify him before the actual winner even finished....

Shaq Speaks: I'm At A Low-C Performance Level As An Analyst, And I Don't See How The Fuck Steve Nash Won Two MVPs
Shaq's been pretty bad on Inside the NBA. He's playing the Barkley role at a sub-Barkley level, and Barkley's right over there, anyway. Thankfully, Shaq knows it, he tells Vibe....

Taunting In Professional Bowling Is The Best Taunting
There was a lot riding on Pete Weber's final roll at last night's Professional Bowlers Association's U.S. Open. The 49-year-old Weber needed no less than a strike to defeat Mike Fagan to become the first man to win the tournament five times, and to become the oldest man to win the event. But this w...

How The Doping Case Against Ryan Braun Fell Apart: One Theory
The conventional wisdom on Ryan Braun's overturned doping suspension is that it was a triumph of cautious proceduralism over substantive justice—a victory for protocol and a rare (and for my money not entirely unwelcome) defeat for the drug cops. Baseball's testing program caught a juicer, the think...

Special Edition Jose Canseco Tweet As Motivational Poster
This is a new feature where we celebrate Jose Canseco by creating motivational posters out of his actual tweets. We believe it is in this context that the world can best appreciate our favorite Bash Brother....

This Is A Three-Quarter-Court Buzzer-Beating Dagger In Double Overtime
The final seconds of this game between Cal Poly Pomona and Cal State Dominguez Hills were enough to give a coach (or fans) a heart attack. Cal Poly hit a three with less than 9 seconds left to go up by two. Cal State then hit a three of it's own following a timeout leaving only .6 seconds on the c...

BBC Tries its Damnedest Not To Show Streaker At Six Nations Match, Shows Streaker Anyway
The Beeb's a paragon of good taste and proper culture, which rather makes you wonder how the Six Nations rugby competition ends up on its esteemed airways. (Or this.) Yet there it is, and in today's match featuring France against Scotland in Edinburgh the BBC found itself face-to-face with a nake...

Today In Jose Canseco Tweets As Motivational Posters
This is a new feature where we celebrate Jose Canseco by creating motivational posters out of his actual tweets. We believe it is in this context that the world can best appreciate our favorite Bash Brother....

Anthony "Showtime" Pettis Knocked Out Joe Lauzon With A Kick To The Skull
UFC 144's opening event of the Pay-Per-View didn't last long, as Anthony Pettis knocked out Joe Lauzon in the first round of their lightweight bout in Tokyo....

Mishaps In Online Advertising: The Danica Patrick Edition
Welcome back to Mishaps in Online Advertising. Today, thanks many of you readers, we have Danica Patrick spinning out of control. Fortunately for her, she's got that $500 vanishing deductible. Someone is on her side....

Minnesota Man Videotapes Girls High School Basketball Games, Masturbates And Perpetuates Creepy Stereotypes
Richard Querna "likes to film the ones with talent." But what does he mean by talent? "When [Mankato policeman Dale Stoltman] asked if Querna likes to film the ones that are good looking, the man "acknowledged that might be true." Ah....

Charles Barkley Dropped A "Jeremy 'Rin'" On-Air Last Night, But Was It On Purpose?
Despite having plenty of words by volume erupt from his lips, Sir Charles hasn't always been the most cunning linguist. (That's turrible.) So we don't know what to make of his slip-up last night, in which he went to the Asian-pronunciation-stereotype box and dropped a "Jeremy Rin" on viewers after...