ing Page 1405 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXVIII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Daniel Snyder's dumbass libel suit lies gets double tapped by DEVGRU....

Retiring Beer League Softball Commish Would Like To Thank Himself For All His Hard Work And Dedication
Lucky for us and our readers, half of all intramural sports participants join up just to get in touch with their inner asshole. I suspect that most of these individuals are tolerable for most of the day, but once they throw on a T-shirt with a number on the back something changes inside them. Like t...

Watch This Manny Pacquiao Puppet Sing A Sweet Ballad
Unless you have Showtime or are a boxing fan, you probably haven't noticed much buildup for the Manny Pacquiao vs. Shane Mosley fight this weekend. That probably has something to do with the fact that Shane Mosley is not Floyd Mayweather Jr. or a Mexican. Luckily, some dude has been playing around...

We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXVII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Daniel Snyder's dumbass libel suit lies down in darkness....

A Case Study In Incompetence: Dan Snyder's PR Guy, Tony Wyllie
Maybe you heard about the stunning display of asshattedness last week by Redskins proto-flack Tony Wyllie. The occasion: A University of Maryland College of Journalism “ethics in sports media” panel, to which Wyllie arrived late. Dan Snyder’s dumbass libel suit came up, at which point Wyllie offere...

Some Drunk Giants Players Got Into It With Drunk Capitals Fans At A Hockey Game
In town to play the Nationals, a few members of the San Francisco Giants took in the Lightning/Capitals game yesterday. According to a fan who was there, there was some good-natured ribbing going on with the next luxury box over, including Pat Burrell telling a screaming fan that the players on the ...

Today In Terrifying Ledes
"Police say a supporter has been shot dead following a Brazilian soccer game that was interrupted by a swarm of bees and ended with a brawl between players on the field." [AP]...

They're Still Playing That Crazy-Ass, Everything-At-Once Sport Called Kronum
Hickey went and checked out a new rec league for the fledgling sport-clusterfuck Kronum just outside of Philadelphia over the weekend. "Here's what I ask people," founder Bill Gibson tells the Metro. "Do you listen to your grandparents' music? Well, why are you playing your grandparents' sports?" [M...

Mark Sanchez's Childhood Best Friend, Now A Jet, Was Once A Horrible, Malevolent Teenager
On Saturday, the Jets drafted Scotty McKnight, a wide receiver from Colorado, in the seventh round, in large part because Mark Sanchez spoke highly of McKnight. The two have been friends since age 9....

Kings Have At Least One More Year Of Mediocre Basketball Ahead Of Them In Sacramento
"We're going to stay in Sacramento for another year," Kings co-owner George Maloof said today. "We appreciate [the fans'] loyalty to the franchise, and we're going to give Mayor [Kevin] Johnson another try to hopefully bring his vision to reality with a new arena." The vision had better include mone...

How ESPN Engineered Mark Ingram's Magic Moment
There was a very strange minute of television last week. After Ingram was drafted by New Orleans at No. 28 overall — the same position his father went in 1987 — Suzy Kolber presented/confronted the son with an email from the father....

Future Robot Overlord Practices Snagging Human Skulls
On to the next war: the coming robot uprising. And — OH SHIT THEY CAN CATCH NOW....

Osama Bin Laden Is Dead, Professional Wrestler Declares In Most American Video Ever
And then John Cena holds up his championship belt, and "The Stars and Stripes Forever" starts playing over the speakers. Everything about this is perfect, right down to the guy shouting, "We won." [via @SherwoodStrauss]...

We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXVI
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Master Snyder's dumbass libel suit gets coldly and effortlessly dismembered to send a message to anybody who thinks their money affords them the right to treat the legal syst...

Here's Video Of People Dancing To Sir Mix-A-Lot Outside A Braves Game
This footage of "Don Doing Work" while "tailgating at an Atlanta Braves game" gets a lot less annoying 2:10 in. This is because Don cedes the parking-lot circle to some fellow tailgaters, at least one of whom has clearly interpreted "Baby Got Back" in a variety of settings before....

Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread
Both the San Jose Sharks and Tampa Bay Lightning attempt to take two-game leads in their respective playoff series. For the Sharks, that'd mean holding rink against the Detroit Red Wings. For the Lightning, that'd mean heading south only needing to win two of three home games against the Washington...

This Is What A Windsurfing Accident Looks Like To A Nearby Windsurfer
A couple weeks ago, windsurfer Boujmaa Guilloul was involved in a serious accident while trying to land the elusive Triple Loop at Ho'okipa. It was a water in the lungs, broken fingers type thing....

If You Think LeBron James Quit On The Cavs In Last Year's Playoffs, LeBron James Thinks You're "Corny"
LeBron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers faced the Boston Celtics in the second round of last year's NBA playoffs. LeBron James and the Miami Heat will face the Boston Celtics in the second round of this year's NBA playoffs, too!...

Here's Video Of A Swedish Table-Tennis Battle Featuring The Elusive No-Look Spin-Shot Winner
What you see here, according to the ping-pong aficionados at Sport Post, is "international table tennis player Mattias Oversjo deliver[ing] an incredible no look spin shot against fellow Swede, Jörgen Persson."...

We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXV
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until [Daniel] Snyder's dumbass libel suit goes straight to Hell, where it belongs....