ing Page 714 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The NFL's Women Summit Was The Mindless Pandering It Always Was Meant To Be
First, let’s get this out of the way: The NFL and its franchises are a corporate enterprise. They exist to make money. They don’t exist to do anything else. They do not exist to make this a better world. They do not exist to uplift anyone. They do not exist to enact change on inequality or ending po...
Washington State Gives Community Service Award To Player For Completing Court-Ordered Service
A hearty congratulations to Washington State linebacker Logan Tago for being awarded the Fall 2017 CCE Community Involvement Award! Tago notched an impressive 240 hours in the community during the fall semester. ...
A Tamer Wing Bowl As Eagles Fans Rest Up For Super Bowl
PHILADELPHIA — The last time the Eagles went to the Super Bowl, someone threw a bottle through my friend’s windshield as he pulled into the parking lot for Wing Bowl. When he got out to inspect the damage, something worse happened: He and his passengers were accused of being Patriots fans....
Let’s Go Ice Fishing Like Fucking Morons<em></em>
I am fully aware that literally everyone in sports media did an ice fishing stunt here in Minnesota this week. But what if I told you that OUR ice fishing stunt was the bestest? Changes your whole outlook on matters now, doesn’t it?...
Kangaroo Destroys Cyclist
Today in news from Australia: A kangaroo leapt out of a bush and took out a cyclist, who was reportedly going about 18 mph. There’s video:...
28 Russian Athletes Get Their Olympic Doping Bans Overturned
With the Olympics a week away from kicking off in South Korea, a decision by the Court of Arbitration for Sport has thrown the entire matter of retribution against Russian doping into further disarray. Last year, the IOC issued lifetime bans to 43 Russian athletes from the Sochi Olympics for partici...
Let's Remember Some Guys: 1990 Basketball Guys
In this episode of Let’s Remember Some Guys, Tom Ley and I try to find treasure in a pack of 1990 Fleer basketball cards. We get into a tangent about old basketball nicknames and how David “The Admiral” Robinson and Ken “Snake” Norman had badass ones. (Apparently Norman hates snakes, though.) Fat Le...
Neymar Catches Too Much Shit For Trying To Have Fun<em></em>
Late on during a tight and tense cup match between PSG and Rennes, Neymar—trying to wrangle a long punt and wind down the clock to protect his team’s 3-2 lead—was whistled for what he believed to be a soft foul on Rennes’s Hamari Traoré. To whittle away even more time, Neymar kicked away the ball be...
Kirk Cousins Is About To Get <i>Paid</i>, But By Whom?
Last night’s megatrade that will send Alex Smith to Washington ensures that this offseason is almost certain to feature that rarest of NFL species: an experienced starting quarterback venturing into unrestricted free agency. Brace yourself, gentle reader: We live in a world in which Kirk Cousins wil...
Quiksilver CEO Pierre Agnes Is Missing At Sea
Pierre Agnes, the 54-year-old CEO of surfing company Quiksilver, has been declared missing at sea by French authorities, after his fishing boat washed ashore Tuesday without him inside....
Washington Safety D.J. Swearinger Is Pissed About His Teammate Being Traded
Washington and Kansas City are reportedly set to pull off something of a blockbuster trade, with the Chiefs sending quarterback Alex Smith to D.C. in exchange for a third-round draft pick and cornerback Kendall Fuller. Upon learning that Fuller was included in the deal, Skins safety D.J. Swearinger’...
Report: Chiefs Will Trade Alex Smith To Washington
According to the Kansas City Star, the Kansas City Chiefs have reached an agreement to trade longtime starting quarterback Alex Smith to Washington, freeing the Chiefs from a $17 million cap hit....
German Hockey Player Narrowly Avoids <i>Der Eismaschine</i><em></em>
Stefan Loibl of the Straubing Tigers was just giving a routine interview in the second intermission of a 4-2 loss to fellow German hockey club Kölner Haie. But just when you’re feeling safe—that’s when Der Eismaschine will strike....
Roger Goodell Assures Everyone Washington Football Team Will Remain Racist Despite Chief Wahoo Removal
After the Cleveland Indians announced that they’ll be taking Chief Wahoo off of team uniforms by 2019, the Washington NFL team naturally drew scrutiny. Would they follow suit and ditch their comically racist name for something more palatable, or at least scrub their logo for something more neutral?...
There Seems To Be A Problem With Those "Unopenable" Olympic Piss Test Bottles
When you pee into a drug tester’s cup at the Olympics, you don’t just pee into a plastic cup labeled “ATHLETE PISS,” you pee into state-of-the-art BEREG-KIT Geneva bottles made by Swiss manufacturer Berlinger. They have a locking top that can only be opened by a machine that destroys them, which wou...
Impossible Rescue Operation Saves Climber On "Killer Mountain"<em></em>
On Sunday, French mountain climber Elisabeth Revol was rescued by a team of Polish climbers on the slopes of a mountain in northern Pakistan and airlifted to a hospital in Islamabad. The rescue effort involved the Pakistani Army, an urgent crowdfunding campaign, diplomatic intervention, and the aban...
Bumbling Package Thief Injures Leg, Is Rescued By Getaway Driver In Russell Wilson Jersey<em></em>
Stealing packages seems like a scummy, straightforward two-person operation: One briskly walks up to the house, while the other keeps the car running. This one on Friday quickly fell apart due to an unforeseen variable: wet grass....
John Wall Broken, Wizards Dead, Universe Empty
Washington Wizards guard John Wall will miss six to eight weeks for a “procedure to clean up” his sore left knee, the one that has now been interfering with his career on a dismally regular basis since at least as far back as 2012. In related news [long anguished scream, tapering away to silence]....
Braun Strowman Continued Wrecking The WWE Raw Set
WWE has been in Philadelphia for the last few days, and things have been generally well-received. The card on Saturday included what some people are calling two of the best NXT matches ever. The Royal Rumble on Sunday included a men’s Rumble that people generally loved, and a first-ever women’s Rumb...