it Page 1011 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Take Out Your Rage On The Rowing Machine

My problem with the gym has always been that I love cardio, but find it incredibly boring to do cardio in a room filled with other people doing cardio. Walking into a gym right after work alongside a rush of folks with the same idea isn’t very appealing in itself. Behold! A line of sweaty health dro...

Young Child Who Gets The Living God Nutmegged Out Of Him Must Now Quit, Learn Viola

Generally speaking, youth sports are about fun and fitness and finding a bit of self-worth in a big, strange world, and perhaps—perhaps—discovering an activity that makes you Feel Something. But generally speaking—generally speaking—the stakes ain’t that high, and they’re not supposed to be....

Stoke Defender Might Want To Retire After What Riyad Mahrez Did To Him

Like, Philipp Wollscheid at least should probably change his name after this. The elastico itself was disgusting, but that Riyad Mahrez flicked it through the poor defender’s legs, and that Wollscheid just stood their frozen, eyes cast downward looking like a child inspecting the damage after he’d j...

Oh, Hello

This morning, your Premiership highlights are brought to you by horrified woman in the background....

A Few Questions About That Six-Page Letter José Mourinho Supposedly Wrote To Manchester United

Hmm....

We Can't Read Your Sign, Dickhead [UPDATE]

Here’s some Jersey shithead with an illegible sign making an ass out of himself behind the Monmouth Co. sheriff. Hey, dickhead, you’re holding a white sign in the middle of a snowstorm. Nobody can read your fuckin’ sign. If you had a brain in your skull, you’d be inside....

Joe Hart's Tremendous Save Brings Russell Brand To His Feet In Anguish

Man City keeper Joe Hart kept his side even with West Ham United with a brilliant save of a Dimitry Payet free kick that brought anguish to the supporters at Upton Park—especially Russell Brand, in attendance with pal Noel Gallagher. Depending on whether you think Brand is an asshole or if you think...

Three NHL Games, Two NBA Games Postponed By East Coast Blizzard

How are you planning on spending this snowbound evening? Hopefully you weren’t planning on watching the Wizards, Sixers (you definitely weren’t), or the Islanders play tonight. The NHL has postponed today’s Islanders—Flyers game as well as tomorrow’s Capitals—Penguins game. The Capitals game yesterd...

Dele Alli Wondergoal Puts Spurs Up 2-1 On Crystal Palace

Is this the goal of the season? It might be, as Dele Alli scored an absolutely incredible golazo that has us searching for words....

Ovechkin Spotted Getting Gas To Plow Neighbors' Driveways; Is Unafraid Of Blizzard Because "We're From Russia"

Draw your own conclusions about how and why Alex Ovechkin happened to run into D.C. CBS station WUSA at a gas station. All we know is that the Capitals star had three words in response to a query about whether he’s prepared for the blizzard assaulting our nation’s capital: “We’re from Russia.”...

We're The Staff Of Deadspin. Let's Chat.

It’s Friday and the snowpocalypse has descended upon most of us. We’re hanging out in the discussion section below, ready to yak....

Macklemore's Problem Is That Macklemore Is Bad

Last night, white rapping man Macklemore released a song called “White Privilege II.” The song, which is accompanied by a website, is earnest and ostensibly aims to acknowledge and condemn the very white privilege from which Macklemore profits. It is a bad song. To examine how we got to this point, ...

Report: Clippers Trade Josh Smith For The Lint In Daryl Morey's Pocket

Depth was a problem that the Los Angeles Clippers aimed to fix last offseason, particularly with the signings of Josh Smith and Lance Stephenson. Both have been disasters this season, and now Yahoo’s Adrian Wojnarowski is reporting that the Clips are sending Smith back to the Houston Rockets in exch...

The Washington Capitals Shouldn't Play Tonight [Update]

The snow in Washington D.C. is expected to start falling around noon. A blizzard warning formally goes into effect at 3 p.m. The region could get two feet or more. The storm “has life and death implications,” Mayor Muriel Bowser said. “People should hunker down, shelter in place and stay off the roa...

Wow, Makes U Think 

Can You Identify The "Celebrities" Who Will Be Coaching The NHL All-Star Game?

The NHL added a little wrinkle to its (very cool!) new All-Star Game structure. The four 3-on-3 squads representing each division will be coached by an actual NHL coach (Gerard Gallant, Lindy Ruff, Darryl Sutter, and Barry Trotz) as well as, uh, well, hmm, one of ... these guys above here?...

Maurizio Sarri Gets Off Pretty Light After Calling Roberto Mancini A "Faggot"

Napoli manager Maurizio Sarri probably feels lucky today. Days after calling Inter manager Roberto Mancini a “faggot” during a game, the Italian soccer federation has fined him €20,000 and given him a two-match Coppa Italia suspension. It could’ve been a lot worse....

How To Live With Roommates Without Being A Jerk

There’s nothing more freeing than walking around your house naked, and without having to worry whether someone will come home and crash your personal time. Unfortunately, it’s more of a privilege than a reality for most of us. Life is hard, and necessity means splitting the rent with other people if...

Just Three European NBA Players, Making Jokes And Burning Hassan Whiteside

Jazz center and large Frenchman Rudy Gobert sent a semi-hot, cryptic tweet two days ago:...

Radio Dummy On Female NFL Coach: "There's No Place For A Woman In Professional Sports, In Football, Coaching Men"

Cleveland sports radio host Kevin Kiley clearly has a problem with women. Last year, he shared some extremely dumb thoughts about the NFL’s first female referee, saying that the NFL was the “wrong place to put a woman.” He has very similar thoughts on the Bills’ decision to hire Kathryn Smith as a f...