Young Child Who Gets The Living God Nutmegged Out Of Him Must Now Quit, Learn Viola

Generally speaking, youth sports are about fun and fitness and finding a bit of self-worth in a big, strange world, and perhaps—perhaps—discovering an activity that makes you Feel Something. But generally speaking—generally speaking—the stakes ain’t that high, and they’re not supposed to be.

Sometimes, though, the stakes rise, like when some little dæmon marks you as a buster, because you’re a buster, and pulls off a perfect rainbow flick through your legs, escapes out the other side, and leaves you standing there pantsed and flatfooted and wallowing in your own failure and trashness. This is when you, a child, sit down, hang your head, untie your boots, and consider maybe taking up drums, or else improv.

[ The Original Winger]