it Page 791 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
We Regret To Inform You That Yet Another Sixers Rookie Is Super Injured
The Philadelphia 76ers look like they’ll be one of two halfway decent teams in the Eastern Conference next year—and, like the Celtics, they are stocked with a whole bunch of young dudes who look like they’ll be able to keep the team good for a while. One such young dude is Zhaire Smith, for whom the...
Infielder Matt Davidson Struck Out Giancarlo Stanton, Still Hasn't Allowed A Run This Year
Lance Lynn was excellent in his first Yankees start, throwing seven and a third scoreless innings and leading New York to a 7-0 win over the White Sox to break a five-game losing streak. But I don’t care. Lynn allowed two hits, and that’s just not good enough. Not when we’ve got Chicago’s Matt David...
Bird's Dong Ripped Out Of The Sky
The Yankees are looking to get healthy against the woeful White Sox Monday night, following a decisive four-game sweep at the hands of the Red Sox that all but ended the race for the AL East. Mostly they’re having their way, but the highlight of the game came in the top of the fourth inning, when Ya...
Brain Worms Drive Hundreds Of Unfortunate Buckeyes Fans To Gather For Urban Meyer Rally
Ohio State head football coach Urban Meyer is currently on indefinite paid administrative leave while the university completes an investigation of reports that he knew of but did nothing about domestic violence allegations against assistant coach Zach Smith. Meyer is not dead; he is not in jail; he ...
Melons Are Not Meant To Be Bashed On Your Bro's Abs
A couple of extremely pumped and jacked fitness guys chucked some watermelons at each other, proving that people will do just about anything in the pursuit of rock hard abs and/or more Instagram followers:...
How One Team Built A Dynasty—And Won $7 Million—In The Basketball Tournament
When Errick McCollum headed to the bank in August of 2015, he was mostly hoping that his check for nearly $100,000 would clear. He wasn’t broke or anything like destitute at the time—the older brother of Blazers star C.J. was, at the time, making a good living playing professional basketball in Chin...
The Best Comedy Bits Going Are Leeds Manager Marcelo Bielsa's Interviews
If you’ve found yourself confused about why those familiar with Argentine mad genius manager Marcelo Bielsa were giddy with excitement when he got the Leeds United job earlier this summer, just watch the bizarre, hilarious, Google Translate-in-the-flesh pre- and post-match interviews he gave to Sky ...
“Among the 14 versions the Post-Gazette collected, the Pirates use the slowest tempo by more than 20 beats per minute. Some teams, like the Oakland Athletics, have versions more than 25 percent faster than the Pirates.” What’s with Pittsburgh’s distinct, super-slow version of “Take Me Out to the Bal...
Randy Moss Wore A Good Tie To The Hall Of Fame Ceremony
Randy Moss wore a tie to Saturday’s Pro Football Hall of Fame ceremonies showing the names of black men and women and children who were either killed by police or died under suspicious circumstances while in police custody. Moss didn’t bring it up during his animated 17-minute speech, but he had an ...
Papa John Dumped By Another University
Papa John Schnatter is most closely associated with the University of Louisville, but he also had an economic center at Purdue University named after him back in April of this year, when his John H. Schnatter Family Foundation reportedly pledged $8 million towards the school’s effort “to beef up hir...
Michael Jordan Backs Away From President Trump With Limpest Possible Statement
Michael Jordan found himself unexpectedly dragged into President Trump’s latest absurd feud with a prominent black athlete, when the senile cable-haver in chief closed his Twitter outburst directed at Don Lemon and LeBron James with the petty exclamation “I like Mike!”...
And Now, James Franklin's Dark Purple Butt
Penn State head coach James Franklin spoke at Penn State Media Day about, among other things, the experience of taking all his players paintballing for a recent team outing. This may not have been a great idea for a person whose job it is to push these competitive young men to endure exhaustion and ...
Angry Diaper President Lashes Out At LeBron James On Twitter
Our idiot president spent his Friday night engaged in the extremely healthy and productive behavior we’ve all come to expect from the leader of the free world: watching cable news enough to get somehow dumber and angrier, and then picking a fight about it on Twitter....
Urban Meyer And Zach Smith Are Defending Themselves, Even If Their Answers Don’t Quite Make Sense
In a statement posted on his Twitter account, Ohio State coach Urban Meyer admitted Friday afternoon that he knew about a 2015 incident in which former assistant coach Zach Smith allegedly strangled his ex-wife, Courtney. After initially claiming ignorance at Big Ten media day—saying, “I know nothin...
How ESPN Ended Up Paying Brett McMurphy To Post The Year's Biggest College Football Story On Facebook
Brett McMurphy, who is about as plugged in as any college football reporter can be, was always going to scoop ESPN on the Urban Meyer-Zach Smith story. But that the Worldwide Leader paid him to not publish the scoop on their own website, well, that’s the result of a very particular kind of corporate...
Heartwarming: Asshole Boss Owned By Impromptu Strike
Friends, what we have here is the most compelling argument for worker solidarity you will see all day. Earlier this week, Indianapolis welder Antoine Dangerfield was working for a contractor building a UPS facility when he caught the moment when over 100 workers walked off the job after a few of the...
Undertaker's Demonic, Pyromaniacal Brother Elected Mayor Of Tennessee County
Republican Glenn Jacobs, also known as WWE’s Kane, was elected mayor of Knox County, Tennessee, Thursday. Kane won the Republican primary back in May by just 17 votes, and immediately became the overwhelming favorite for the gig in the solidly conservative area....
Cody Garbrandt Only Has Limp Excuses For His Rotten Old Tweets
Former UFC bantamweight champion Cody Garbrandt will fight T.J. Dillashaw for his belt on Saturday, nine months after getting his face punched off by Dillashaw in his first-ever loss as a professional. In the run-up to the fight, MMA fans have surfaced a treasure trove of old tweets from Garbrandt, ...
Art Briles Got A New Job Coaching Football In Italy
Disgraced former Baylor head coach Art Briles has a new job. After a botched stint in the CFL and a pair of aborted college consulting gigs, Briles has accepted the head coaching job with Florence’s Italian Football League team, Guelfi Firenze....