ja Page 670 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Steven Jackson Gives Colonics A Big 'Thumbs Up '
The St. Louis Rams' Steven Jackson was a colossal bust last season for many fantasy football owners, but he will apparently try anything to not be such a stiff this year. This includes agreeing, per his girlfriend's recommendation, to have a colonic in order to "clean his system out." Not only was...

Jay Mariotti Needs Protection From That Inquisitive Rick Telander
An update on the Jay Mariotti incident we referenced earlier this morning. An eyewitness source files the following report:...

The Jay Mariotti Chronicles Continue
You know, we apologize: We just can't help ourselves from making Jay Mariotti more famous. The Cubs' domination of the White Sox this weekend led to a full Paul Sullivan roundup in the Chicago Tribune, and it includes that great newspaper staple: The blind item!...

C.C. Is Not A Singles Hitter
After a rough start to the season Cleveland's C.C. Sabathia has found his groove on the mound, and now at the plate as well. The rotund power pitcher didn't like his teammates calling him a singles hitter after last year's round of interleague play, so he stepped into the box in his first at bat of ...

Jay Mariotti: Still In Dire Need Of A Serious Pounding
Chicago Sun-Times columnist, hockey-haired yakkity-yak, and out-and-out dickface, Jay Mariotti, recently signed a three-year extension at his paper, but it seems like at the end of that contract, he may very well be the only one left writing for the sports section....

Javon Walker's Las Vegas Bludgeoning Won't Result In Any Missed Time
Although the details of what in Wayne Newton happened to Raiders' receiver Javon Walker early Monday morning are still being investigated, he has been released from the hospital and it appears the orbital smashing he received won't , according to Raiders' coach Lane Kiffin, keep him out of training...

Javon Walker Speaks Cryptically, Nonsensically About His Violent Night In Vegas
Okay, this makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, but it is "a statement" from Javon Walker about what he says happened during his infamous champagne-spraying night in Vegas. And which lucky media outlet gets the first quote from Walker? TheDirty.com, of course. Here's what Javon told the venerable +...

Javon Walker's Reckless Champagne Spraying Habits May Have Led To His Cold-Cocking, Some Say
TMZ is now running photos of Walker seemingly in the middle of his $15,000 champagne splashdown party, and the site also suggests that he may have doused the wrong patron with his pink bubbly, which, as we all know, is an offense that may result in an overnight hospital stay with an orbital fracture...

David Ortiz Is Keeping Unusual Company
David Ortiz is still recovering from his injury — he won't be back for a while, but at least the cast is off — so he's keeping busy the only way he knows how: By hanging out with the crazyman that is James Woods....

Trouble-Finding Javon Walker Hospitalized After Vegas Beating, Robbery
Newly acquired Oakland Raiders wideout Javon Walker seemed to be having a festive weekend until Monday morning. The Las Vegas Journal's one-eyed gossip dog, Norm!, spotted him at Tryst nightclub Saturday night "spraying the crowd with some of the 15 bottles of Dom Perignon Rose champagne he ordered...

Sasha Vujacic's New Best Pal
So here's a reason to enjoy the "intimacy" of NBA basketball: Guys like Irv Bauman here can, right in the middle of the action, just start talking to one of the players. Can you fathom what he might be saying to Sasha Vujacic here?...

And Now For News That Isn't Fair
The gal on the left there, her name is Adriana Lima. (Just in case you wanted a name to go with the wet dream later on.) The guy on the right is some kind of basketball player named Marko Jaric. One of them has about 8½ million Google searches. The other, not even 200 grand. Hopefully Ms. Lima signs...

Jay Gibbons Finally Finds A Home
After his rather famous letter to 29 major league teams recently in which he asked for another shot at baseball with a minor league contract, former Oriole and HGH connoisseur Jay Gibbons was rather surprised to get exactly zero offers. But determined to get back into the game somehow, Gibbons has p...

PTI Calls Out Michael Wilbon For His Festive Night Of Hollywood Ogling
Yesterday's post featuring Michael Wilbon enjoying the alluring top shelf of Girl Next Door Kendra and L.A. Times' J.A. Adande workin' it with some women(?) who earn a livin' doing dirty things on camera, gave PTI co-host Tony Kornheiser much to work with during yesterday's show....

Pardon The Interruption...In My Pants!
The above photo of PTI-er and blog despiser Michael Wilbon and Girl Next Door Kendra was taken last night at a post-Lakers after party by p*rn star and blogger, Christian, from HIS personal blog Christian Sings The Blues (NSFW), which he describes as "My Strange Life Within the Adult Film Business: ...

Elijah Dukes Has Been Quiet Long Enough
Last week, Elijah Dukes hit a walk-off two-run homer to beat the Cardinals in the second game of a doubleheader. (It really was an awesome game.) Elijah, as Elijah is wont to do, celebrated a bit too vigorously, upsetting an umpire and his manager, Manny Acta. Thus was the fuse lit....

Media Approval Ratings: Jay Bilas
We would like to repeat our favorite piece of biographical information about Jay Bilas: He once starred in a movie with Dolph Lundgren. The movie was "Dark Angel," and Bilas plays an alien named "Azeck." Man this makes us happy....

Colleagues Dislike Jay Mariotti Even More Than You Do
You know what will be fun? When this whole stupid "mainstream media vs. blogs" debate ends in this sports, like it (mostly) has in the political world. (When Joe Klein and Andrew Sullivan have blogs, it's time to let the fight go, Mr. Reilly.) What we will likely need, in the first step toward conci...

Steroid Dealer David Jacobs Gave Himself Unfortunate Nickname
David Jacobs, the NFL steroid snitch found shot dead in his Plano, Texas home with his girlfriend, didn't hide his love of all things performance-enhancing, and it may have cost him his life....