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The Miami Marlins Are Getting The Bad Season They Deserve
Having now traded away infielder and former franchise cornerstone Hanley Ramirez, second baseman Omar Infante, and starting pitcher Anibal Sanchez, it appears that the Miami Marlins are in full fire-sale mode. This impression is further compounded by Josh Johnson's rumored residence on the trading ...

Last Night's <em>The Franchise: Miami Marlins</em> Distilled Down To Its Motherfucking Essence
The Miami Marlins all-access curse-fest that is The Franchise premiered last night on Showtime, and the first episode made for enjoyable viewing (more enjoyable, at least, than the ESPY Awards, which it ran against). Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria bet the house on the 2012 season, hoping a new stadiu...

Jeffrey Loria Had A Marlins Park Cake With Swarovski Crystals And A Working Retractable Roof
After trotting out Muhammad Ali like a show pony, the Marlins owner welcomed friends and colleagues to his luxury suite on opening night with this cake: a custom made replica of Marlins Park. That bigass logo? It's 3,600 crystals. Probably worth more than your life. I swear to god, this thing better...

Jeffrey Loria Is Spectacularly Unlikable
Ben McGrath has a fun story about the Miami Marlins in this week's New Yorker (subscription required), which, as its primary function, introduces uptown types to Ozzie (and Oney) Guillen. But Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria is present too. In fact, he condescends to you through print. He makes you feel ...

Hanley Ramirez's Sugar Daddy Keeps Him In Bling
Tacky, tacky, tacky. But the pendant celebrating Ramirez's batting average title isn't as bad as it could be, since he didn't buy it himself. No, it's a gift from an older gentleman that likes to see he's taken care of....

Marlins Won't Care About Winning For Three More Years
It was nice of Florida Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria to arrive to spring training this morning. (He figured how how to TiVo that America's Next Top Model this morning.) And he sure has some big, I mean BIG, plans for this Marlins team in the next few years....