juvenilia Page 2 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Al Trautwig Is Worried About Amar'e Stoudemire's Bulging Dick
Every time an athlete comes down with a bulging disc, we start the countdown. It took MSG's Al Trautwig but a few hours to make the inevitable slip-up....

When Oregon Fans Make The "O" Symbol, They're Screaming "Vagina" In American Sign Language, <em>New York Times</em> Reports
The New York Times shared an important revelation out of Eugene, Ore. yesterday, and we wanted to pass it on because we are immature: the spade-shaped Oregon "O" that Ducks fans so enthusiastically make to show support for the team means "vagina" in American Sign Language....

The Rams Were A Real Pain In Ahmad Bradshaw's Nuts Last Night
Your morning roundup for Sept. 20, the day we learned that putting on a banana costume sometimes isn't worth it. Photo via tipster Ryan, who saw it on ESPN.com and wrote, "Thanks for the nut grab photo, ESPN." Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Eli Manning Told Suzy Kolber He Was Impressed With How Big Brandon Stokley's Package Grew During The Game
Here's Eli Manning with some important postgame football talk about how wide receiver Brandon Stokley's package size changed during tonight's game. Giants won, 28-16, even though the offense didn't play too well....

Kansas College Suspends Its Golfers For Dongish Facebook Photo, But Team Captain Jack Hiscock Says They're Appealing The Suspension
Lindsborg, Kansas's tiny Bethany College—a Lutheran school, home of the Fighting Swedes—has suspended its entire golf team for three tournaments as a punishment for taking the above naked photo together. You can't see any dong in the shot, but it's there, under the golfing gear....

Joe Flacco's New Bride Is A Very Understanding Woman
Marriage is supposed to be compromising, right? [JasonPrezant.com, h/t Andy]...

Tiny Child Inspires Us To Get Up Off Our Asses To Pwactice Widing A Bike
With the way cynicism travels through generations these days, we'll give him about six to eight years before he realizes that compared to the rest of life, riding a bike isn't really a big deal at all. But my god, what good cheer! Consider this cold heart (especially from someone who also struggle...

Ja'Juan Story Sincerely Regrets Telling Everyone His Doodoo Story
Last week, we brought you the charming story of Florida football recruit Ja'Juan Story, who abandoned all interview protocol and told Gator Country that he prepares for games by "taking a doodoo" and listening to Katy Perry songs. Today, we're sorry to report that he has reneged on his claims, and w...

Ja'Juan Story's Doodoo Story
This week, just by sharing two details about his pregame ritual on the site Gator Country, incoming Florida receiver Ja'Juan Story became the most interesting freshman football player in the nation. This has been going around a bit now, but we couldn't let it pass by without giving it our full appro...

Kyle Lohse Impersonates Tony La Russa (And All The Shingles Headlines We Opted Against Using)
• Kyle Lohse Was Just Missing A Shingle Thing In Today's Tony La Russa Impersonation • Kyle Lohse Shingles Out La Russa For Impersonation • Kyle Lohse Puts The Final Shingle On His La Russa Impersonation • Shingle File: Today In Tony La Russa Impersonations • Living Shingle: Kyle Lohse Does Tony L...

Rafael Nadal 0, His Underwear 1
Reporting that Rafael Nadal won a match on a clay surface is a lot like reporting that the Mets lost a game, so we needed another angle on his 6-2, 6-2 win over Gael Monfils in the Barcelona Open quarterfinals today. Luckily, the cameras on hand for the match captured that angle for us. In the inc...

One Ref's Fall Over A Ceremonial Carpet Is Another Ref's Fall Over The Same Ceremonial Carpet
We're not sure where this clip came from, as the Leafs missed out on the playoffs for the sixth straight year this season, but sometimes — like when two men whose job it is to be alert on ice fail to observe and avoid the same ceremonial carpet laid out in front of them, for example — context just...

They're Still Playing "Friday" At NHL Games, And At Least One Grown Man Is Enjoying It
We know that internet memes generally have a very particular shelf life, and we respect that Rebecca Black's "Friday" phenomenon might have worn out its welcome by now. When we first posted the video to accompany another meme, it had 200,000 views; it now has 61 million views and a dedicated Tumbl...

Great Moments In The History Of Sports Anchors Saying "Bulging Dick"
Tipster George sent in a clip of MASN commentator Jim Palmer making a fairly recurring slip-up while discussing Derek Lee's bulging disc on Sunday. Here's a brief look back at the ever-expanding history of sports anchors saying "bulging dick" on air, featuring Palmer, Steve Levy, and Win McMurry. ...

Playtime: The Animals Shooting Baskets Megamix, Set To "One Shining Moment"
Animals play basketball, too....

Presented Without Comment: Mark Sanchez To Receive USC's Young Alumni Merit Award
Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez will receive the USC Alumni Association's inaugural Young Alumni Merit Award at a ceremony in Los Angeles on April 30....

Everyone's Talking About Harry Baals
The Fort Wayne city government is renaming its government center, and its residents have demonstrated an overwhelming preference to honor former mayor Harry Baals (now pronounced bales). This is making for some excellent TV news reports, all compiled above....