k Page 2698 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
"Way To Go, Paul": Hulk-Like Hockey Parent Breaks Glass With Slap
Look, I'm going to play this one straight: I know absolutely nothing about this video. It was tweeted at us from an unknown Twitter account, has almost no description, and was posted by a seemingly normal YouTube account that has been around for five years. I cannot find any other trace of it on...
Long-Limbed Kevin Durant Obliterates Marcin Gortat With Dunk
It is a good thing that Marcin Gortat is a goofy-ass guy with funny hair, who chills watching porn on Saturday night, and has a humvee and pig to play with, because this is the kind of dunk that could ruin a man without a balanced perspective on life. ...
Seagull Thrives After Getting Knocked Out During Cricket Match
The Perth Scorchers took on the Melbourne Stars in something called the Big Bash League yesterday, but more interestingly, a Scorchers batter nailed a seagull with a hit. It wasn't quite Randy Johnson demolishing a dove with a fastball—the damn thing didn't explode—but I'm sure it didn't feel go...
Robert Allenby's Kidnapping Story Challenged By Another Witness
Robert Allenby's tale of his alleged kidnapping sounded implausible from the beginning, and now another witness has gone on the record disputing it. You can read our detailed story on Allenby's alleged Friday night "kidnapping" and the investigation that followed, but basically: PGA golfer Robert ...
How To Survive At The Poker Table
Poker used to be cool. From Wild Bill Hickok getting shot up over aces and eights to Paul Newman and Robert Shaw eyefucking each other in The Sting, it has always held a place in American culture as the game you'd find grown-ass men playing in the smoke-filled back rooms of grown-ass places. Blame...
Oregon Fan Gets Ohio State Tattoo To Settle Bet; Looks Sad About It
I want to call this dude a poor, unlucky bastard, but he didn't have to go and make that bet. Maintained his honor, though:...
This Awful Beer Is Great, Because Context Matters
Yesterday I fucked off work around two in the afternoon, which is to say about an hour after I finally fucked back onto work for the first time since last Thursday. I'd sincerely intended to bravely struggle through a full afternoon of hiding behind my keyboard, but then I got a text from one of m...
The Time A Jets Kicker Smacked A Ball Boy For Not Rubbing Up The Balls
Since all anyone can talk about today is the various ways in which people manipulate footballs and what dastardly cheaters the New England Patriots are, it seems like as good a time as any to remember the time a mouthy Patriots ball boy got the shit smacked out of him by an opposing kicker for not p...
Round 2 Of The Ultimate Super Bowl Snack Playoffs Starts NOW! Vote!
Cheese & Crackers very nearly pulled off a huge upset. The 8-seed, matched up against football snack staple Nacho Cheese Doritos, was almost left off the bracket entirely because your bracketeer thought it perhaps a touch too bougie for this exercise. Which is insane, when you consider that the sa...
Report: NFL Was Aware Of Patriots Deflation Allegations Before Sunday
This, at least, answers one of the peripheral questions surrounding claims that the Patriots illegally deflated Tom Brady's footballs: just how and when the Colts and the NFL became aware of the funny business....
How To Conquer Sticky Spills With Patience (Or None At All)
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....
Jon Ryan Doing "The Belt" Is A Truly Great Moment In Punter History
After Seattle's batshit overtime victory over the Packers in the NFC Championship Game, we learned that Seahawks punter Jon Ryan, immediately after throwing a touchdown pass to backup tackle Garry Gilliam on a fake field goal, did Aaron Rodgers's belt move right at Packers head coach Mike McCarthy...
The Ballghazi Takes Are Here, And They Are Fucking Insane
You knew they were coming, America. The second the Patriots got busted for doctoring footballs, you knew the TAKENAMI would rush in. And VERILY IT HAS COME TO PASS. Oh, people. Oh, this is my Christmas. These takes are so pure in their stridency, so firm in their conviction that ROGER GOODELL M...
Brad Johnson Paid Some Guys To Doctor 100 Footballs Before Super Bowl
As we deal with the unfolding Patriots scandal, we seek context. And it's unclear precisely how common the practice of illegally doctoring footballs actually is among quarterbacks. But it's obvious that the urge to do so is universal, because the benefits are real and significant. Ask Brad Johnson, ...
Aaron Rodgers Doesn't Think God Is A Football Fan
Lots of people talkin' about God and football these days! Just a day after Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson blamed his four-interception NFC Championship game performance on God, Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers, who was vanquished by Wilson (and possibly the Lord Almighty?!) in that game, was...
The Patriots' Ballghazi Scandal Cannot Be Overblown Enough
If you've been struggling to care about the Patriots being accused of deflating footballs, and have been hoping the whole thing would just blow over so we could get to talking about a truly excellent and fascinating Super Bowl matchup, you, my friend, are shit out of luck. Ballghazi is real, and it ...
Ernie Johnson Jokingly Asks Westbrook "How Was The Execution Tonight?"
On Friday night Russell Westbrook raged at the media, refusing to answer questions with anything other than "we executed," and telling one reporter that he flat out didn't like him. After tonight's Thunder win over the Heat, the NBA TV crew conducted an otherwise mundane interview with Westbrook—y...
Report: 11 Of 12 Patriots-Supplied Footballs Were Underinflated
There has been two days worth of smoke surrounding Ballghazi, and now it looks like there might actually be a fire. According to ESPN's Chris Mortensen, the NFL's investigation into whether the Patriots deflated footballs during Sunday's AFC Championship Game has found that 11 out of the 12 balls th...
A-Rod Turns To Unlikely Source To Assist His Comeback: Barry Bonds
At 39 and having missed the entire 2014 season due to suspension, Alex Rodriguez is attempting an improbable comeback. His skills were already rapidly declining in 2013—in 44 games he posted his lowest batting average and slugging percentage since 1995, and his fielding has been getting worse for ...