l Page 7556 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ya' Ever Play A Game Called "Texas Muffin Tumble" Lil' Lady?
Okay, so President G.W. Bush didn't exactly ask that question to softballer Jennie Finch, but the creepy sexual tension between these two just leaps off of this photo, does it not? But Bush wasn't in the White House Rose Garden just to give Finch the ol' shitkicker leer. He was there to formally sen...

Chris Evert And Greg Norman Are Just Two Old Horndogs Lovin' Life
Yesterday's British Open didn't have the storybook ending Greg Norman probably would've hoped for, but two people that were probably thrilled Norman faltered in the final round yesterday were his ex-wife and current wife Chris Evert's ex-husband. Although rumors about a passionate affair between the...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch on the subway ... • MLB: Brewers at Cardinals. (7 p.m., ET). Ray Durham acquisition tips the balance of power. [ESPN] • MLB: Rangers at White Sox. (8:11 p.m., ET). I'll meet you in front of the Harold Baines statue. [KDFI] [WCIU] • Cycling: Tour de France (8 p.m., ET). This is a rest d...

University of Iowa Athletic Staff Conspired to Cover Up a Sexual Assault?
A fellow student-athlete at Iowa alleged she was sexually assaulted by two football players on October 14, 2007. Within 36 hours of the assault the victim reported the incident to the highest levels of the Iowa Athletic department. Including athletic director Gary Barta, head football coach Kirk Fer...

Value of Euro vs. Dollar Impacting NBA Signings?
In the latest sign of American hoops hegemony showing some weakness, fivetooltool points out that several NBA players are returning to Europe because they can get better contracts there. Why? Partially because of the increasing value of the euro relative to the dollar....

Afternoon Blogdome: Wisdom Of Our Fathers
• Luke Russert blogs for Richard Deitsch: SI's media maven is attempting to blog for 24 hours straight today. During this experiment, however, he received an assist from the Tim Russert's son, Luke, who chimed in with his favorite sports memory he shared with his late father: "We went to a lot of ba...

Jeremy Shockey Breaks Through New Orleans Douche Levee
This is Jeremy Shockey. You might remember Jeremy from the time you drafted him two rounds too high in your fantasy draft because a) He played in New York, and b) You're subconsciously just a bit racist. Jeremy, seen here trying to convince a woman to go home with him so he can give her Hepatitis ...

Alex Rodriguez Is A Fragile Little Dominican Butterfly, Friends Say
It's been pretty easy to destroy Alex Rodriguez about his pending divorce, given all the attention that's been paid toward his alleged frequent affairs with numerous muscular women and, perhaps, Madonna....

Your Very First Deadspin Executions
To keep the comments as fresh and outstanding as they've been up to this point, Commenting Guru Rob Iracane will write a bi-weekly Comment Ombudsman column. It runs every other week. This is that week....

Is Mary Beth King Being Phased Out Of Monday Morning Quarterback?
Congratulations to Mary Beth King, daughter or Peter King, target of KSK's ire, on her new internship.(This photo is not of King and his daughter — I hope.) Of course, PK writes about this internship in today's Monday Morning Quarterback column and her position may create another moral quandary for ...

America Deploying Secret Pollution-Fighting Masks For Olympic Athletes to Wear
First the Chinese try and ban blacks and Mongolians from the bar, and now America has special masks to ward off the Beijing pollution? This Olympics is going to be great. Thankfully the Wall Street Journal is there to bring us the story of the masks. Or as much as they actually can because the masks...

South Carolina Cockominiums Headed to Auction
Do you see what they've done there? They've combined condominium and cock. Which usually only happens on South Beach. Anyway, the condo craze came to Columbia, South Carolina and condo towers went up around the wasteland that is Williams-Brice Stadium. But it seems the real estate market is not as r...

Use DZNUTS: Your Scrotum Will Thank You
Oh what the hell, let's just call it balls day on Deadspin. Introducing dznuts, developed for competitive cyclists "to reduce and relieve chaffing, irritation, and protect fragile perineal skin from bacterial and fungal infections." It's got masterwort, so you know it's good....

Fear Factor In The Northwoods League
A collegiate summer baseball league team called the Madison Mallards was handing out free tickets on Thursday that included all-you-can-eat snack bar privileges; a pretty sweet deal, considering all you had to do to earn it was to eat a dead beetle. The Mallards offered the tickets to the first 250 ...

Third Circuit Tosses Indecency Fine Against CBS For Jackson's Nipple
In a victory for fans of nipples everywhere, a three judge panel of the Third Circuit found that the FCC "acted abitrarily and capriciously" in imposing their fine against CBS....

Soon Jerry Buss' Invincible Laker Girl Army Shall Be Complete. Ah Ha Ha Ha Ha!
The Los Angeles Times may not have a handle on every story, but by God they had a reporter up at 8 a.m. on Saturday to cover Laker Girls auditions. By his own admission, Adam Rose took "about 350" photos, plus some video, the latter which he hasn't posted yet. Hopefully he was invited and not just h...

Carson Palmer Despises Ohio State, Jim Tressel, and Their Fans
It's a good thing Ohio State fans are so worldly and forgiving. Because otherwise Carson could be in some hot water. Evidently Palmer, a noted USC and Pac-10 homer, went on Los Angeles sports talk radio and brought the thunder....

Morning Blogdome: Baron Davis Appears To Be Taking The Elton Brand Trade Very Hard
• Steve Nash and Baron Davis took the brown acid, apparently: Regardless of the reason for Steve Nash and Baron Davis riding a tandem bike, dressed like idiots, on a sunny day in Santa Monica, it's still odd and unsettling. [Bar Stool Sports]...

Pirates' Pitcher Gets Erotic Massage, But Rockies Get The Happy Ending
One might say that the Pirates tried everything to make rookie Yoslan Herrera feel comfortable on the mound on Saturday in his debut against the Rockies. Some days, nothing works. Of course, this could simply be Bud Selig's random cup check policy we've been hearing about....

When Premier League, MLS Fans Rumble
A friendly? I think not. It was only a matter of time before British soccer hooligans met MLS fans on the field of battle. Columbus, Ohio, represent! There may be paperboys, cheerful mailmen and elderly women tending flower gardens, but they're still the mean streets, yo. But now, let us focus on th...