lance Page 27 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Lance Armstrong Has Failed Everyone
Alberto Contador has won his second Tour de France. Livestrong, Alberto! One person who's thrilled about this news? This precocious, Tour-loving five-year-old. [SI]...
Sumo Cycling: The Next Great Olympic Sport
Perhaps Lance Armstrong would secretly like his teammate Alberto Contador to be pinned down by this extremely zealous fan, so he can win an eighth race....
Suspected Cancer Hoaxer Found Dead
Fifteen-year-old brain cancer patient "Jonathan Jay White" turns out to have been a 24-year-old woman in Ammon, Idaho, who was found Wednesday in her car, dead of an apparent suicide....
Was Lance Armstrong Duped By A Cancer Fake?
Jonathan Jay White is a 15-year-old with brain cancer whose devotion to the Livestrong credo caught the attention of Lance Armstrong and several generous donors. The grifter who invented "Jonathan Jay White" will soon catch the attention of federal authorities....
How $600 Worth Of Equipment Put Perv In Erin Andrews' Hotel Room
It's only a matter of time before the cops and Chief Inspector Don Chavez crack this thing wide open. When they do, they'll find someone who needed $600 worth of gadgetry and a penknife to screw with Erin Andrews' life....
Lance Not Livestrong Enough
Lance Armstrong moved to second place in the Tour de France this weekend, but fell almost two minutes behind his teammate, Alberto Contador. Oh, the indignity of the wingman, fighting for scraps as his "partner" reaps all the glory....
Le Cycling Is A Contact Sport
One woman dies when she's hit by a police motorcycle, and two riders are injured by, um, air rifle projectiles. In other news, LiveStrong tweets about the injustice of George Hincapie not winning the yellow jersey. It's a cruel world....
Tour de France Riders Forced To Perform Without Mechanical Supplements
The Tour de France tried an "experiment" today—banning radios that allow coaches and team leaders to communicate with their riders during the race. It's almost like they expect these athletes to use their own brains!...
Teammate Is Totally Undermining Lance Armstrong
Alberto Contador unexpectedly moved into second, and the Tour de France suddenly went all Brandy vs. Monica. Lance: "Things didn't really go according to the plan we mapped out before. I was a little surprised, but it doesn't matter." [AFP]...
Rick Reilly® Celebrates After Scoring Big Interview With Lance Armstrong's Ass
But before that, Rick Reilly® was apparently wandering aimlessly on a French road and this nice photographer lady picked him up. Then they went back to the hotel and slammed beers....
The Critic-Proofing Of Lance Armstrong
The ad you see here is the new Lance Armstrong spot for Nike, which would be merely standard-issue, inspiromatic marketing schlock if it didn't come so creepily close to suggesting that to criticize Lance now is to somehow enable cancer....
Lance Armstrong Can't Not Be The Top Dog
Lance Armstrong said he just wanted to get some exercise and maybe promote his wristbands, because after four years off, expecting him to win the Tour de France would just be silly. What's that? He's in first place now? Lovely....
The Tour De France is, How You Say, "Underway"
Lance Armstrong began his quest for eight with a solid start in the first-stage time trial. And that's the only mention of France we'll have on this July 4th, I can promise you that! East Coast Bias has you covered....
A Nutty Theory About Lance Armstrong
A couple of scientists argue that Lance Armstrong did indeed employ certain exotic performance-enhancing procedures before his run of seven consecutive Tour De France victories: namely, getting his diseased testicle lopped off....
Lance Armstrong Takes On The Wall Street Journal, Lance Armstrong Tweet-Reports
Last month, Lance Armstrong boycotted the media, speaking directly to his fans in 140-character chunks. He tried to break the ban by writing a letter to The WSJ, but they "butchered it," and instead, he printed it on his blog....
Rick Majerus, Communicator Extraordinaire
From a review of Lance Allred's Longshot: The Adventures of a Deaf Fundamentalist Mormon Kid and His Journey to the NBA: "[Majerus] had a habit of calling Lance 'cunt extraordinaire' and ... would sometimes spell out 'cunt' with his fingers to make sure there was 'no miscommunication.'" [Cleveland S...
Lance Armstrong Turned Off By Sheryl Crow's Incessant Babymaking Demands
Yes, we know: You've been incontinent with suspense about what rent asunder the sacred ugly-bumping bond between four-hundred-time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong and Sheryl Crow, the singer who had that song that time....
Lance Armstrong's New Bike Insipred By Hope
Because it was designed by Obama poster artist Shepard Fairey. [AnimalNY]...
The French Will Not Let This Lance Armstrong Thing Go
Lance Armstrong has never failed a drug test and that makes French people insane, but like anyone with a good enough lawyer, they may have found a loophole to punish him anyway....