league Page 267 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Zlatan Ibrahimović And His Mountain-Sized Ego Give A Great Interview
As everyone should know by now, Zlatan Ibrahimović’s arrogance is unreal. For more proof, take the short interview above, in which the big Swede declares himself a lion, explains why he doesn’t compare himself to the other strikers in the Premier League by saying “lions, they don’t compare themselve...

Everton Score Stupid Goal, Manchester United Get Late Penalty, Both Go Home Unhappy
Today’s Manchester United-Everton game could’ve been a big deal to either team. If Everton won, they would’ve leapt over Arsenal and United to take the fifth spot in the table, just five points behind Man City in fourth; while they still would’ve had basically no realistic shot of finishing in the t...

Can A Gimpy Liverpool Hobble Over The Finish Line And Grab A Top Four Spot?
Last weekend felt like the hump. If Liverpool could just get out of that Everton match with three points and no big injuries, they could finally breathe easy, knowing that the remainder of their schedule was weak and well-spaced enough to form a clear path to the top four and a Champions League spot...

Here's Arsène Wenger Physically Embodying The Despair Of Arsenal's Season
Watch this video of an anguished Arsène Wenger as he looks upon his charges while they conspire to throw away the work they’d done just moments earlier to get back on level terms with Manchester City. Wenger sees Mesut Özil cough the ball up, watches City carve up Arsenal’s back line with ease, and ...

David Moyes Apologizes For Threatening To Slap Female Reporter, Says More Dumb Stuff
Today, Sunderland manager David Moyes has publicly responded to a newly released video in which he can be heard saying “You still might get a slap even though you’re a woman” to BBC reporter Vicki Sparks after a postgame interview from a couple weeks ago....

This Bicycle Kick From Jong Tae-Se Is Just Gorgeous
Jong Tae-se scored the only goal for Shimizu S-Pulse of the J1 League in its 3-1 loss to Júbilo Iwata yesterday, but it sure was a beauty:...

International Duty Wiped Out Everton And Ronald Koeman Is Pissed Again
The FIFA virus has hit Everton hard, wreaking havoc on their expected lineup ahead of this weekend’s big rivalry game against Liverpool. If there’s one man who can’t stand this particular illness, and who has no compunction making his frustration perfectly clear to those he considers at fault, it’s ...

Premier League Owners Ask For Post-Brexit Protection For Player Immigration
English Premier League club owners are requesting that the government work to ensure that their teams are not put at a competitive disadvantage with the country’s upcoming departure from the European Union. ...

Pero Antić Celebrates Too Hard, Punches Teammate In The Face
Macedonian strongman Pero Antić, last seen in the NBA cracking skulls for the Hawks, is back in the Euroleague, where he first made his name as a bruiser. He’s currently playing for Turkish club Fenerbahçe alongside fellow NBA vets Jan Vesely and Ekpe Udoh. Antić is still muscling people out of his ...

Oh, Cool, The NFL Is Trying To Kill One More Vestige Of Weirdness
The NFL’s determination to erase fun from its sport isn’t limited to its staid distribution of training videos for touchdown dances. The Washington Post and ESPN have reported that the league’s competition committee is also set to consider a proposal to ban leaping over the line of scrimmage on extr...

Wayne Rooney's Potential Return To Everton Actually Makes Lots Of Sense
It’s long felt inevitable that one of these days Everton’s prodigal son Wayne Rooney would return home. Judging from a report in the Independent that quotes sources close to Everton and Manchester United as believing the move is “likely to happen” this summer, we might be mere months away from seein...

NFL Developing New Way To Drain All Joy From Sport For No Reason
The NFL will develop “an educational training video” on how to celebrate a fucking touchdown, according to a tweet this morning by executive vice president of football operations Troy Vincent, who if this was not the most embarrassing thing he has ever announced in public has had an extremely awful ...

Italian Soccer Guy Playing In England Misses Pasta And The Sun
Italy’s Andrea Ranocchia joined Premier League stragglers Hull City this season, hoping to work his way back on to the Italian national team. In the meantime, he’s doing his best to adjust to life in England, but there a couple things from Italy he really misses. Namely, pasta and sunshine. ...

South African Soccer Player Accidentally Thanks Both Wife And Girlfriend In Post-Game Talk
The South African Premier League’s Mohammed Anas won Man of the Match for his two goals in yesterday’s Free State-Cape Town game. Good stuff! Except for his acceptance speech, in which he thanked both his wife and girlfriend (before backtracking to assure his wife that, really, he loves her so much)...

This Champions League Quarterfinal Draw Is So Good
There are only eight teams left standing in the Champions League. This is the stage of the tournament where Europe’s biggest and best clubs (and Leicester City) will battle for ultimate supremacy. And quite the fascinating battle it will be, because the draw is fantastic:...

Romelu Lukaku Knows He Has Outgrown Everton
It’s not quite the juiciest quote from Romelu Lukaku’s wide-ranging media session with reporters Tuesday, during which he clarified just how serious his desire is to play for a truly great, title-challenging team—be that at Everton or, more likely, elsewhere—but this response to a question about whe...

Manchester City Knocked Out Of Champions League; Leicester Last English Team Standing
The Foxes were the best English team in the Premier League last year, and apparently they’re the best English team in the Champions League this season. With Manchester City’s 3-1 loss to Monaco today, Leicester fucking City are the final representatives in Europe’s top competition from the Best Leag...

Leicester City's Champions League Dream Survives Another Round
That’s Wes Morgan up there leaning into his “Captain Morgan” nickname, peering through a mimed telescope after scoring Leicester City’s opening goal against Sevilla and seeing that indeed, his rowdy bunch of scalawags were right on course to make it to the Champions League quarterfinals....

Paul Pogba Is Good
If the statement in the headline of this post—Paul Pogba is good—seems ridiculous to you, too trivially obvious to be worth saying, then you’re in luck, because it means you haven’t had your mind numbed by some of the predictably over-the-top criticism he has been subject to since joining the Premie...

José Mourinho Believes He Did Chelsea A Huge Favor By Being So Terrible Last Season
José Mourinho thinks he deserves credit for Chelsea’s success this season. You can tell that this is true because he has said the exact opposite....