league Page 309 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Steven Gerrard Slips, Allows Demba Ba To Score Easy Goal
In stoppage time at the end of the first half of Chelsea-Liverpool, Steven Gerrard slipped on a nothing play and allowed Demba Ba to coast right in on goal, with only the keeper to beat. Ba scored and Chelsea have a 1-0 lead in a game that could decide the Premier League title. Naturally, we added ...
Manchester United Sacks Sad Sack David Moyes After Disastrous Campaign
It's official! Sad David Moyes has been fired by sad Manchester United, just one year into a six-year contract. While Moyes had avoided the ax a couple times this season, the sacking isn't at all surprising given a nightmarish campaign that has resulted in United's worst ever Premier League season a...
The Diamondbacks Will Wear Kansas City Throwback Uniforms
Look at that. That's a damn fine uniform. Unis from a century ago were usually pretty great—white or gray, high socks, uncluttered chest logo, and my favorite, logo-less caps. The Diamondbacks will suit up in these bad boys next Wednesday, and they're going to look great, but it's more than little w...
Atlético Madrid Beat Barça In Champions League, Dream Season Continues
It's all fun and games cheering on plucky upstarts Atlético Madrid, right up until the point they tear out your heart and play keepy-uppy with it. So excuse me if I'm not appropriately excited about Atlético's thoroughly deserved and enjoyable-for-neutrals 1-0 Champions League win over Barcelona....
Sad Man United Score Great Goal, Then Get Pounded In Champions League
So...the gig's up. Manchester United, who have played like absolute dog shit all season long, almost definitely won't play in the Champions League next season. After drawing defending CL champions FC Bayern last week in the first leg of their quarterfinal, they needed to avoid a loss in Germany to a...
Typical José: Chelsea's Champions League Win Was Right On Schedule
José Mourinho's teams are some goddamn cockroaches, man. Just when you think you've got them squashed, their viscous innards seeping from their corrugated underbelly—as PSG could've justifiably believed, leading Chelsea 3-1 after the first leg of their Champions League tie—they somehow keep right on...
Hey Look, Real Madrid Might Choke The Champions League Away
Last week, Real Madrid played German side Borussia Dortmund in the first leg of their Champions League quarterfinal. The result was a smackdown, and Madrid beat Dortmund 3-0 to more or less lay this tie to rest. Right? Nah....
This Is Probably Around The Time You Call The Game
Yes, that is a tornado (apparently not a tornado but just a really scary stormcloud) beyond the left-field wall at yesterday's opening night for the double-A Frisco RoughRiders. It was part of a series of storms that swept the Dallas area, and resulted in the RoughRiders' game being postponed in the...
Wayne Rooney Dives, Draws A Red, Smirks
Here's Rooney's 90th minute dive that earned Bastian Schweinsteiger a second yellow, and a suspension for next week's Champions League second leg....
Watch The Stunning Champions League Strike That Put Atléti Up On Barça
Barcelona welcomed Atlético Madrid to the Camp Nou today in what is becoming a regular rivalry of increasingly large stakes. It was a Champions League matchup this time, as tense and cagey as you'd expect—that is, until Diego decided he'd had enough and straight flattened a ball into the net from ab...
Arkansas Minor League Team Introduces Redneck Possum Mascot
The Arkansas Travelers are the Angels AA affiliate, and introduced a pair of new mascots today on Little Rock's KARK. One of the mascots is normal. The other is a horrible redneck possum beast....
Twitter Users Mistaken For Soccer Whipping Boys Share A Moment
It's tough having a Twitter username that gets mistaken for a celebrity's by stupid people. Today on Twitter, three of them—not-David-Moyes, not-Robin-van-Persie, and not-André Villas-Boas—had a commiseration....
The End Of Arsenal's Premier League Title Hopes, On An Infinite Loop
Sky's still blue....
Here's Everton's Ross Barkley Dribbling 75 Yards And Scoring A Goal
So, Everton are playing Newcastle today, and midway through the first half, the Magpies took a corner kick that was cleared to Everton's young midfielder Ross Barkley. Then Barkley dribbled all the way down the right by himself, cut left inside the box through Newcastle defenders, and roofed a shot ...
Wayne Rooney Scores Goal From 50 Yards Away
Wayne Rooney opened the scoring for Manchester United today with a long-range bomb reminiscent of Luis Suarez's goal for Liverpool two years ago, a 50-yard volley that left NBC's announcers almost at a loss for words. We're sure Rooney's West Ham opponents had a few, though....
Ref Sends Off Wrong Man In Chelsea-Arsenal Match
Arsenal's Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain appeared to use his hand to deflect a shot that was, at the very least, near the goal today in Stamford Bridge. Eden Hazard one-timed a feed from Fernando Torres to the far side of the goal and Oxlade-Chamberlain must have just brain-farted because he dove and trie...
Manchester United Get A Big Win, Remain Soccer's Funniest Joke
Coaches and players often say, when asked whether something or other has added fire to an upcoming game, that if just being in the Big Time Sporting Event doesn't motivate you, you're beyond hope anyway. If that's true, then Manchester United's passion-filled 3-0 comeback against Olympiakos probably...