league Page 344 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Is MLS Actually Doing Something Better Than European Soccer?
Arsene Wenger thinks the Premier League offseason should be in the winter rather than the summer. Well, it'd do wonders for Blackpool's tourist-heavy attendance....
Antoine Walker Airballs Free Throw, Nails Metaphor In D-League Debut
Flat broke, Walker signed a low-5-figure deal with the Idaho Stampede. He scored 13 in his debut last night, but we think this shot is a more appropriate highlight. [h/t Dan]...
Today In Unfortunately Named Minor League Baseball Teams: The Sugar Land Skeeters
"The team will be known as the Skeeters, which celebrates the hometown love of warm Texas nights and an itch for baseball." They left out "one who ejaculates all over the place." God help that poor mascot. [ABCHouston]...
The Newest Saga In The Sad Story Of Broke Antoine Walker Brings Us To The D-League
There was a time when Antoine Walker was every Celtics fan's second-favorite player. How our fortunes change. Six months after filing for personal bankruptcy, Walker is reportedly joining the Idaho Stampede — assuming he passes a routine background check....
Canadian Football Player Breaks His Leg Like An American Football Player
Leron Mitchell broke his leg during the Grey Cup last night. It's really awful, but the YouTube description is beautifully poetic: "Leron Mitchell snaps his leg during the CFL championship game. His team also lost." When it rains in Canada, it pours....
Real Madrid Two Get Sent Off On Purpose
This post, written by Josh Burt, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff....
Omaha Royals Change Team Name To Storm Chasers; Ensure Lameness With Promo Video
In what could prove to be the year's second-worst re-branding effort, the Omaha Royals announced today that they will now be known as the Storm Chasers. The promotional video almost makes it all pathetically endearing, but mostly it's just pathetic....
Last Night's Winner: Saying N-O To Lingerie Football In OKC
Sorry Oklahoma City. If you want to watch a bunch of struggling models play a loose simulacrum of football, you'll just have to watch it on TV like everybody nobody else....
Ape Escapes With Little League's Cash
What's sadder than being a mascot for a little league team? Not much, actually. But the "Beast From The East" just started 10 years in prison for stealing more than 200 grand from the league....
AC Milan-Real Madrid Match Interrupted With Fan On The Field Zaniness
Infamous pitch invader Jimmy Jump—not to be confused with the Laurence Fishburne chraracter from the Schooly D-heavy King of New York—claimed another scalp last night during the titanic clash between AC Milan and Real Madrid in the Champions League....
Stereotypical Laxer Is Not At All Stereotypical, Says Stereotypically Annoying <em>New York Times</em> Story
Yesterday's NYT slobjob of professional laxer Paul Rabil argues that he represents "a different way to think about lacrosse players." He's a big shaggy-haired white dude who went to an all-boys Catholic school in Maryland. Wow, what a brogue....
Giants Take NLDS, Fans Decide It's A Good Time To Cover "Don't Stop Believin'"
If sports movies and uplifting soft-rock songs make you tear up, this rendition of "Don't Stop Believin'" may get you all Favrey....
Here's Video Of A Woman In White Lingerie Hitting A Woman In Blue Lingerie Really Hard
Even football players in shoulder pads and lacy unmentionables should wear helmets. This is the age of the concussion, after all....
Rio Ferdinand Refuses To Sit During Flight To Valencia In Order To Protect His Flimsy Back
Before we start, here's an unbelievable stat: Rio Ferdinand has missed 61 of Manchester United's last 103 games. That must be very near, or even worse than, benchmark crock Ledley King?...
Today, In Unintentional Rape Puns
Obviously this headline is a pun on the Orem Owlz's playoff opponents, the Raptors. Not anything else. Don't know why anyone would think that. [MiLB.com, H/T Jared]...
The Champions League Is Harder To Win Than The World Cup, Lies Jose Mourinho
As reported on the popular Spanish website, Sport.es, Jose Mourinho's mouth has once again kicked into action before the logic part of his brain, as he muttered these words:...
Intern Horrors: The One About Rhinoceros Testicles And The Old Munitions Depot
Hello and welcome back to Intern Horrors, the occasional feature wherein browbeaten office lackeys complain about having their brows beaten to various degrees. Today, explosions in close proximity to a stash of rhinoceros testicles, Black Monday, old-man nudity, and more....
Robert Green Will Never Be Allowed To Forget His World Cup Gaffe
The poor bastard made one little mistake in his Premier League match that was slightly similar to his cock-up against the US, and immediately, everywhere, it's "Robert Green will never recover from the World Cup."...
Minor League Team's Beyoncé Parody Video Is Cringe Inducing
Here's the Tennessee Smokies' (Cubs' Double-A) spirit crew with "Smokies Ladies." Be nice. They're probably college students, hospitality majors, who need the three credits for this internship, and will sing any awful thing put in front of them. [via Cubs Fan Report]...
63-Year-Old Bill Lee Pitches, Wins
The Grizzled old hippie started a game for the Brockton Rox over the weekend. It was a publicity stunt, sure, but the old dude was still pretty good!...