light Page 275 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Here's Chad McGhee With Your Weekly Knox City Greyhounds Update And Tony "Horny Little Bitch" Romo Evisceration
The mighty Knox City Greyhounds got back on the right side of the scoreboard by defeating the Woodson Cowboys 46-0. A marvelous victory. A redemptive victory....
Hey Look, A Squirrel Ran Onto The Field During The Phillies/Cardinals Game
Bottom of the fifth. Cardinals second baseman Skip Schumaker seemed to have an issue with a muscle in his ass or upper leg. Trainer came out. All seemed fine....
Shane Victorino Forgot How To Play Baseball On This Throw
It looks like he's gonna remember, but then, no, he doesn't. Doesn't matter: Phillies are still leading, 2-1....
Watch A High School Kicker Nail A 64-Yard Field Goal With Room To Spare
Austin Pacheco, a high school senior out of Carson City, Nev. who will probably be made very rich by an NFL contract in a few years, kicked a game-winning field goal on Friday night—from 64 yards and with room to spare. This is, if you recall, one yard longer than Sebastian Janikowski's record-tyi...
Here's The Delmon Young Home Run That Gave Detroit A 5-4 Victory
And the freaky-fast Justin Verlander just got through a scoreless eighth. Hope there's a comfortable wall somewhere on 8 Mile, because the Yankees' backs are up against it....
Here's Video Of An Incredible Bicycle Kick Soccer Goal From Germany
Eren Derdiyok of Bayer Leverkusen in the German Bundesliga first had to leap in the air to stop the ball, even as his momentum was going in the same direction. Then, without stopping, he had to keep the ball in his possession. Then, he managed to stop his momentum while still possessing the ball. An...
It's Your Weekly Mark Sanchez Lowlight Reel! Featuring Appearances By Joe Flacco
The ineptness at the quarterback position last night was, in a word, staggering. Mark Sanchez—this year's king of the lowlight reel—fumbled four times and threw an interception, while Flacco fumbled once and threw an interception as well. Together, the two completed just 21 of 66 passes. If you sp...
Let's Watch Marion Barber Land A Celebratory Back Flip With His Face
"Marion Barber of the Chicago Bears does a flip after making his first touchdown for the team in the fourth quarter against the Carolina Panthers at Soldier Field on Sunday." [Daily Herald] (H/T Disco Choo)...
Here's Video Of An Absolutely Phenomenal Bundesliga Goal
Not too many people can trap a long pass, flip the ball back over their head while double covered and score with an overhead kick. But Eren Derdiyok of Bayer Leverkusen could yesterday in a 3-1 win over Wolfsburg....
Watch Calvin Johnson Make An Incredible Catch During The Lions Comeback Win Over Dallas
Detroit Lions QB Matthew Stafford didn't have any open receivers. That doesn't matter when you can throw an alley-oop in triple-covered Calvin Johnson's direction....
Let's Watch Ronnie Brown Try To Throw A Pass When He's Stopped On A Goal-Line Rush
The Philadelphia Eagles had a third-and-goal from the 1/3-yard line against San Francisco in the first half of their game today. Ronnie Brown tried to rush up the middle to extend the Eagles's seven-point lead. Ronnie Brown got stopped cold. So Ronnie Brown tried to throw a pass to no one in parti...
Júlio Baptista's Overhead-Kick Goal In Injury Time Was A Thing Of Beauty
Malaga moved atop La Liga standings yesterday with a 3-2 victory over Getafe. The winning goal came in penalty time. Big deal for the whole side and for Júlio Baptista, the Brazilian who has played for Real Madrid, Arsenal and Roma....
It's Better To Fall On A Blocked Punt Than Run 25 Yards In The Wrong Direction
The AP account of Cornell's 31-7 win over Wagner points out that, in addition to 3.5 sacks, Zack Imhoff "also had two forced fumbles and blocked a punt for Cornell." Balls-out game. But that doesn't do justice to a punt block that someone in Wagner gear scooped up and ran away from their desired e...
Illinois LB Jonathan Brown Checked If The Coast Was Clear Before Kneeing A Foe In The Balls Today
"During the first half of today's Illinois/Northwestern game, Illinois linebacker Jonathan Brown clearly looks around to see if anyone is watching before kneeing Northwestern offensive lineman Patrick Ward in the groin. Of course, with 65,000 people, eleven opposing players and five refs - one of ...
Listen To The Longest Soccer Goal Call Without A Pause Ever
Your morning roundup for Oct. 1, the day the nanny state says you're no longer allowed to legally fornicate with animals in Florida. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Important Question Of The Night, Answered: Dan Johnson Did Not Go Deep To Some Dude's Nuts
This was Dan Johnson's game-tying shot in the ninth against the Yankees, which was briefly the night's most "holy shit" moment and which seemed all the more legendary for having caromed off some guy's balls. Verdict: no nut shot....
Here's Chad McGhee With Your Weekly Knox City Greyhounds Update And T-Shirt Sales Pitch
Last Friday was not a good day for the Knox City Greyhounds. In fact, per superfan Chad McGhee, "it went bad." Like 54-8 bad. "Nightmare on Elm Street" bad. "I pray to the Lord that this team regroups and gets their heads out of their asses hopefully" bad....
A Belarusian Goalie Participated In A Lionel Messi Trick-Shot Goal Today
It took just six seconds for Alyaksandr Pyotravich Hutar, goalkeeper extraordinaire for FC Bate Borisov, to look at his gloves after Lionel Messi scored the first of his two goals in UEFA Champions League play today. Because it was their fault, the whole perfectly bouncing the ball in front to ser...
Giants Rookie Conor Gillaspie Had A Very Rookie Inside-The-Park Homer Last Night (Video)
There are two things that make this—Conor Gillaspie's first major league home run—a very rookie home run: 1. The stumble and trip as he is waved home ( "Honestly, I was pretty embarrassed," he said after the game. "I didn't want to get up"); and 2. The fact that once he had made it home and set al...
After An 18-Second, 80-Yard Game-Winning Drive, Football Team Has To Answer To Guy In Banana Suit
In Minnesota small-college football circles, Augsburg College's stunning upset of St. John's University is being called "The Miracle in Collegeville." That's an apt name considering the game was played in Collegeville and anytime you engineer an 80-yard game-winning drive that starts with 18 secon...