lol Page 41 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Man United Hire New Manager, Already Expect To Win Premier League
It's not even next season yet and we've already got the first lolunited post of the '14-'15 campaign. New Manchester United ship captain Louis van Gaal has officially been christened, and in lieu of smacking him across the head with a champagne bottle, they've promised him £150M, with an expectation...

Wrigley Field Mural Depicts Scene From Comiskey Park
To celebrate Wrigley Field's 100th anniversary, the Cubs painted a bunch of murals on the outer wall of the stadium facing Waveland Avenue. One of the murals, seen above, is said to depict Charles Lindbergh taking in a Cubs game in 1927. The only problem with the picture is that it wasn't taken at W...

We Made Some Improvements To The Knicks' New D-League Team's Logo
Remember when the Knicks announced that they would be taking fan suggestions for the name of their new D-League team? Yesterday, they finally revealed the name and logo of the new team. Drum roll please......

Citi Field Shake Shack Food Poisoning Hits Mets Player, Phillies Manager
Phillies manager Ryne Sandberg and Mets first baseman Lucas Duda both came down with cases of food poisoning during a weekend series in Queens, and the culprit seems to be undercooked burgers from the Citi Field Shake Shack. But the Mets, naturally, are disputing that account....

The 2013-14 Premier League Season Was Well And Truly Fucking Awesome
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. There was pessimism, hope, and ultimately failure. There was schadenfreude; oh, was there schadenfreude. There were also huge games, mesmerizing goals, and more twists in the title race than a M. Night Shyamalan movie (but actually good). To cap o...

Jenrry Mejia Is Not Hating Baseball So Much Anymore
When we last checked in with Mets pitcher Jenrry Mejia, he was just so damn sick and tired of all the bullshit. He's since been removed from the starting rotation, which seems to have done a lot of good for his mental well being....

Adorable 101-Year-Old Lady Throws Out First Pitch
A 101-year-old grandma named Kitty Cohen (top-notch grandma name, by the way) threw out the first pitch at yesterday's Blue Jays game. She made the most of her opportunity. ...

Jets Beat Writer Says He'll Hitchhike Home If Team Uses All Draft Picks
Heading into the final day of the NFL Draft, Manish Mehta—shit-stirrer extraordinaire for the New York Daily News—had a strong feeling that the Jets would trade at least one of their league-high nine remaining draft picks. On Twitter, he said he would hitchhike home if the Jets did not trade at leas...

New York Jets Select Calvin Pryor With 18th Pick
That's six straight first-round picks who play defense, and thus do not play quarterback. Never forget. ...

Lolo Jones Is Not A Track Virgin
Fifteen hundred fans crowd the bleachers on a Friday night in Bloomington, Indiana. They're here for the American Track League's debut meet, sure. But really, they're here to see Lolo Jones. ...

Cristiano Ronaldo Goal Celebration Most Ronaldo Thing Ever
So Real Madrid is embarrassing Bayern Munich at Allianz Arena, and that was before... whatever this is....

Sarah Spain Calls Out <em>Numbers Never Lie</em> For Useless Knicks Talk
On today's episode of Numbers Never Lie, espnW's Sarah Spain filled in for Jemele Hill to debate with Michael Smith and Jorge Sedano. One topic involved the Knicks, who aren't in the ongoing NBA playoffs. In so many words, Spain justifiably wondered why the fuck they were talking about the Knicks....

White Pants Make Mets Troops Tribute Not Even Half-Assed
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

Matt Harvey Tweets Bird-Flipping Picture, Immediately Deletes Account
Mets pitcher Matt Harvey tweeted out this picture today as a way to mark the six-month anniversary of his Tommy John surgery. It's a silly and harmless picture, but Harvey, or someone within the Mets organization, thought that its existence was offensive enough to warrant Harvey deleting his entire ...

Manchester United Sacks Sad Sack David Moyes After Disastrous Campaign
It's official! Sad David Moyes has been fired by sad Manchester United, just one year into a six-year contract. While Moyes had avoided the ax a couple times this season, the sacking isn't at all surprising given a nightmarish campaign that has resulted in United's worst ever Premier League season a...

Reports: David Moyes To Be Sacked Any Day Now; A Gallery Of Moyesface
Oh, Moyesy. It appears our season of schadenfreude will soon be coming to a premature end, with reports practically everywhere saying "The Chosen One" is about to become "The Sacked One."...

Bartolo Colon's Plate Appearances Are Baseball's Gift To All Of Us
We should treasure every time Mets pitcher Bartolo Colon has to take an at-bat. Baseball's giving us a present. Last night's game against the Braves was a special treat, as Colon swung so hard that his helmet flew off of his head. Yes, there's video....

European Golfer Jumps Into Lake To Escape Hornet Attack
Pablo Larrazabal was just minding his own business, playing through his second round at the Malaysian Open on Friday, when all of a sudden—HORNET ATTACK!...

<em>Empire Of Derp</em>: Your Heartbreaking Knicks Season In Review Montage
We'll remember so much about this NBA regular season, but most Knicks executives, players, and fans would like to forget it all. To prevent that from ever happening, we've prepared this montage of the Knicks' 2013-2014 season's most memorable moments....