mb Page 314 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Our Roomba Vacuumed The House With Dog Shit
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. Are you dirty? Email her....

Butt Goal
Cambridge United beat Notts County 3-1 in League Two yesterday, thanks in part to Ben Williamson’s butt, which scored the go-ahead goal. The butt in question is the second-highest scoring ass of League Two, after Josh Windass, who has 10....

Down With Turkey Haters
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....

Kevin Garnett Is Nuts, Part Infinity
ESPN’s Jackie MacMullan wrote an awesome story about Kevin Garnett, who at 39 years old has been called on by the Minnesota Timberwolves to mentor the team’s crop of talented young players in his famously intense style. The story is great because it goes beyond just pointing at Garnett’s lunatic per...

The Patriots Are Sketchy And Deserve Scrutiny
Monday night’s Buffalo Bills-New England Patriots game was a primetime display of shoddy officiating. The most egregious instance involved an inadvertent whistle on a Danny Amendola catch that would have been a huge gain, if not a touchdown, but Gene Steratore’s crew bungled other plays throughout t...

Court Projections Remain Awesome
The Hawks retired Dikembe Mutombo’s number last night, and kicked off the festivities with this court projection. One day I’ll get tired of these. Today is not that day....

¡Golazo Imposíble!
Dairon Asprilla, this is some good kicking. This last angle is pretty definitive proof that the shot hit no butts, and in fact just curved like crazy....

Justin Meram Scores 10 Seconds Into MLS Playoff Game
Columbus got the scoring started rather early in today’s Eastern Conference final against the New York Red Bulls with this goal from Iraq national teamer Justin Meram a mere 10 seconds into the game. Kei Kamara and Ethan Finlay played it onto Meram, and he finished calmly....

Class-Action Lawsuit Filed Against Daily Fantasy Partners Names The NBA, Jerry Jones, And More (UPDATE)
A new class-action lawsuit against companies who partnered with daily fantasy companies DraftKings and FanDuel has been filed and names the NBA, NHL, and MLB, groups led by Jerry Jones, Robert Kraft, and James Dolan, in addition to media companies, credit card companies, and banks in the suit. SI re...

Damn, FanDuel And DraftKings Bring In Shitloads Of Money
As part of the ongoing legal battle between New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman and daily fantasy sites DraftKings and FanDuel, all sorts of interesting documents have been filed with the New York Civil Supreme court. One shows FanDuel’s advice to employees that they could play on other site...

We Have Found The Key To Defeating Aaron Rodgers
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....

Is Tom Brady A Fancy Dog?
Patriots quarterback Tom Brady is on the cover of GQ’s Men of the Year issue, and the cover story is accompanied by a slideshow of artfully produced photos of Brady. These pictures have left us asking one question, though: Is Tom Brady a fancy dog? Let’s go to the evidence:...

No One's Responsible For Chip Kelly's Offense But Chip Kelly
In addition to a concussion, Eagles QB Sam Bradford also suffered a separated shoulder in Sunday’s loss to Miami, according to ESPN. It looks like it’ll be Mark Sanchez under center for at least the next game, which, given Bradford’s play, may or may not be a good thing as Philadelphia desperately n...

Watch High School Freshman Karl-Anthony Towns Interview Kevin Durant, His "Basketball Idol"
It’s only taken eight games for Timberwolves rookie Karl-Anthony Towns to establish himself as one of the dopest young players in the league—seriously, go watch some KAT highlights right now if you haven’t seen him play yet; he’s extremely good—but not that long ago he was just a baby-faced teen ido...

Braves Deal Andrelton Simmons To Angels For Erick Aybar, Top Prospects
After days of rumors that the Atlanta Braves were looking to make a deal, they finally struck. According to multiple reports, they traded Andrelton Simmons and minor leaguer Jose Briceno to the Los Angeles Angels for Erick Aybar, pitching prospects Sean Newcomb and Chris Ellis, and $3 million cash....

Your Guide To The Craziest Sports Scandal You Aren't Paying Attention To
I get it. You see a headline like “Real Madrid Star Karim Benzema Charged In Sextape Blackmail Case” or “Transcript: Karim Benzema Helped Facilitate Blackmail Plot Against Teammate Over Sextape” and you aren’t quite moved. Sure, words like sex tape and blackmail seem juicy, but who is Karim Benzema ...

Why Is It So Hard To Run Out The Clock?
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....

Transcript: Karim Benzema Helped Facilitate Blackmail Plot Against Teammate Over Sextape
Furthering the bizarre saga of Karim Benzema and the criminal charges he faces for his involvement in an alleged plot to blackmail his international teammate Mathieu Valbuena over a sextape, L’Équipe has now produced a full transcript of a phone call between the Real Madrid striker and the accused b...

Colombian Police Find Half A Ton Of Cocaine Hidden In Buses Transporting Soccer Fans
Two packed buses set out from Cali, Colombia this weekend heading towards Santiago, Chile to deliver dozens of soccer fans to the site of the two countries’ World Cup qualifying match. Unbeknownst to the fans, they were accompanied by over 1,000 lbs. of cocaine, discretely hidden underneath the seat...