mb Page 315 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ablaye Mbengue Doesn't Even Need To See The Goal To Score Golazos
It’s not at all easy to score from this distance while facing the goal, let alone with your back to it and shooting the goddamn ball backwards and over your head. If this is the best goal Ablaye Mbengue ever scores in his life, he will be perfectly happy....

The T-Wolves Clobbered The Hawks And Slap-Happy Jeff Teague
It had been a long and frustrating sequence for Jeff Teague. He’d had his shot blocked twice by terrifying rubber giant Karl-Anthony Towns. The refs had missed a possible eight-second violation on the Timberwolves. Andrew Wiggins hit a crazy and-one. A tie game had become a six-point deficit with a ...

Andrew Wiggins Dunked All Over The Bulls Last Night
For a maybe-bad team, the Wolves are really fun to watch. Karl-Anthony Towns looks good and tall and spry, Ricky Rubio is finally healthy, and Young Cock Andrew Wiggins has, so far, done a better job converting his all-world athleticism into production than last year. And he won Rookie Of The Year l...

Ken Shamrock Talking About Getting Knocked Out By Kimbo Slice Will Make You Sad
After nearly five years without a fight, Ken Shamrock, 51, came out of retirement this summer to fight Kimbo Slice, a 41-year-old brawler who hadn’t fought in five years himself. From the start, it figured to be an ugly, bizarre affair. It was....

How To Fix The NFL’s Quarterback Crisis
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....

This Shot May Not Have Counted, But It's Still Cool As Hell
Unfortunately for Celtics forward Jae Crowder, there’s some sort of rule against heaving a full-court inbound pass straight into the bucket. This rule is clearly stupid, and Crowder should have been awarded five points. ...

Real Madrid Star Karim Benzema Charged In Sextape Blackmail Case
After being arrested and questioned by police in France yesterday morning for his possible involvement in a blackmail plot against fellow France international Mathieu Valbuena, Real Madrid’s Karim Benzema has been charged today for “complicity in an attempted extortion.”...

Timberwolves Play Heartrending Tribute To Flip Saunders Before Home Opener
The Minnesota Timberwolves host their first home game of the season tonight, and beforehand played a long and heartfelt tribute to Flip Saunders, who died of Hodgkin’s lymphoma a week ago. Saunders was the Timberwolves’ coach and president of basketball operations, but to residents of Minnesota, Fli...

Didier Drogba, Still An Innovator, Inventing New Ways To Play The Sport
Didier Drogba is in the twilight of his career, but that hasn’t stopped him from innovating. Look at this ingenious technique applied during Montreal’s playoff win against Columbus tonight. Magisterial! ...

Kirk Herbstreit Scared Shitless By Zombies
Chris Fowler played a wonderful prank on Kirk Herbstreit tonight, surprising the ESPN analyst with some characters from the Eastern State Penitentiary haunted house during halftime of tonight’s Notre Dame-Temple game. It’s the first time a zombie has been on Saturday Night Football since Eminem’s ap...

Pierre Garçon Is Leading A Class-Action Lawsuit Against FanDuel On Behalf Of NFL Players
On Friday Pierre Garçon filed a federal class-action lawsuit in Maryland against FanDuel on behalf of all the NFL players whose likenesses and names the site uses, he says, without proper permission. FanDuel has marketing agreements with 15 NFL teams, including Washington, who was one of the first t...

¡Es Insano! Timbers Advance In MLS Playoffs After Breaking Physics In PKs
Portland Timbers are moving on in the MLS playoffs after defeating Sporting Kansas City in a wild match that required eleven rounds of penalties—with the winner being scored by, and then saved by, Timbers keeper Adam Kwarasey....

Football Is Not Family
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....


The Hateful Life And Spiteful Death Of The Man Who Was Vigo The Carpathian
You’ve seen a painting of Norbert Grupe. A heavy, creased brow and shoulder-length hair framing a frightening scowl, the massive work hung in the fictional Manhattan Museum of Art in Ghostbusters II. When the medieval sorcerer pictured within the painting begins to physically manifest, it is on the ...

Kevin Garnett Walked Out Of Practice To Sit In Flip Saunders's Parking Spot
Flip Saunders helped Kevin Garnett as he turned into a dominant NBA player. Their reign on the Timberwolves was the most successful in the team’s short history, and Garnett waived his no-trade clause in February to reunite with Saunders and help the new, young foundation in Minnesota. When Saunders ...

Flip Saunders Is Dead At 60 (UPDATES)
Flip Saunders has died today of Hodgkin’s lymphoma at the age of 60. He was diagnosed in August and initially planned to return to the Minnesota Timberwolves this season, where he was the coach and GM. Yesterday, it was announced that he would not return this season....

Report: Tom Brady's Personal Guru Was Sued For Fraud Twice
One of the highlights revealed in the Tom Brady email dump was his adherence to the teachings and theories of one Alex Guerrero. Guerrero is Brady’s business partner, body coach, and friend, and Brady has defended Guerrero even as numerous allegations of fraud have come out against him. The FTC inve...

Flip Saunders Will Not Return To The Wolves This Season
Flip Saunders was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma in August, but at the time, he and the team were confident that he’d be able to continue with his duties as coach and president while undergoing treatment. Then, in September, he was hospitalized after a setback and took a leave of absence. Reports...
