mia Page 55 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Semi-Pro Soccer Club Owner's Insane Pregame Speech Features R. Kelly Singalong, Threats Of Violence
We’ve all been there. Stuck in a room with coworkers or classmates, coerced into participating in some cheesy team-building exercise by a frothily manic leader seemingly halfway through an eight ball, trying to preserve some shred of dignity while feigning just enough engagement not to get yelled ou...
Jeffrey Loria Explains Why He Could Be Ambassador To France
Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria sat down for a lengthy interview with ESPN’s Jerry Crasnick, the purpose of which was to reveal his kinder, gentler side. Most of the interview deals with Loria’s relationship with José Fernández, but there’s a brief aside in which Crasnick asks Loria about rumors that Do...
Erik Spoelstra Gave Just The Most Excruciating Press Conference After The Heat Missed The Playoffs
Aww hell. The Miami Heat blew out the Wizards tonight to finish their season at 41-41, but they missed the playoffs by a hair as the Pacers and Bulls both won tonight. Heat coach Erik Spoelstra is usually good for a fairly even-keeled postgame interview, but tonight he gave just the saddest speech a...
Marlins Fan Goes Swimming For Giancarlo Stanton Home Run Ball
Giancarlo Stanton accounted for the first four runs the Marlins scored tonight with a pair of two-run dongers. His first was a long, arching bomb that peaked at 148 feet above the field before landing over the center field wall. The latter dinger was utterly unlike the first, as Stanton smacked a ha...
The Miami Heat Are Probably Screwed, And That Sucks
Tonight, the last night of the NBA’s regular season, will settle the Eastern Conference’s seventh and eighth playoff seeds, the last two unsettled spots in the postseason. The Miami Heat, currently sitting in ninth thanks to tiebreakers, can claim one of those spots, technically, but almost certainl...
Adventurous Cat Runs Onto Marlins' Field, Gets Stuck In Home-Run Statue
A small gray cat somehow managed to invade the Marlins’ outfield tonight in the top of the sixth inning. The game against the Atlanta Braves was briefly delayed as the kitty slunk around the base of the wall, scaled it like a ninja, and posted up on the eyesore that is the Marlins’ home-run statue....
Cavs Blow Another Big Fourth-Quarter Lead, Drop To Second In The East
The LeBron James-less Cleveland Cavaliers coughed up another fourth-quarter lead tonight and lost in overtime to the Miami Heat. The result gives the Boston Celtics the first seed in the Eastern Conference and keeps the Miami Heat’s playoff hopes alive. It’s also utterly demoralizing for the Cavs....
Damian Lillard Went Off Last Night
Damian Lillard let teammates Meyers Leonard and C.J. McCollum score the Blazers’ first two buckets of last night’s game against the Jazz. Then he took over. Lillard scored the next 22 (!) points for Portland, giving them a 16-point lead by the end of the first quarter, and he didn’t stop from there....
Reporter Congratulates Loser Rafael Nadal On Win
Right after losing the Miami Open title to Roger Federer in straight sets Sunday, Rafael Nadal was asked how he felt about his “win.”...
Roger Federer Can't Be Stopped By Rafael Nadal, Or Anyone Else
Two famous rivals named Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal both got hurt, and both entered rehab cocoons for most of 2016, biding their time until this January. One emerged a radiant butterfly, posting a 19-5 record on the season, playing in three championship matches—a lovely comeback by any metric. Bu...
Diminutive Tennis Player's Entertaining Hot Streak Ends With ACL Tear<em></em>
If you were to flesh out the cohort of the next generation of tennis, the first few picks would be easy: Nick Kyrgios and Alexander Zverev are the sure shots; Dominic Thiem and Lucas Pouille are a little older but have got to be in the mix; and from the U.S. there’s Jack Sock and hopefully Frances ...
Good Lord, These Moody Man-Children Can Play Tennis
Nick Kyrgios’s win over Alexander Zverev in Miami Thursday was one of my favorite men’s matches this year, but the whole thing felt like a devil’s bargain: for every point of absolute gold, the public was taxed one drawn-out tantrum. A frustrating proposal for some—definitely for the chair ump and l...
Do You Really Want To Know Anything About The Marlins?
Last year was a fun one for the Miami Marlins, until it really, really wasn’t. José Fernández’s death may not actually cast a pall over the Marlins’ entire 2017 season, but it certainly feels that way now. It will definitely feel that way whenever I have to watch Dan Straily pitch....
Jittery Roger Federer Gets An Ugly Win
Today Roger Federer let slip, like an ill-timed fart, perhaps the worst four-point sequence ever seen on his serve....
Venus Williams Is Going For It
Venus Williams defeated world No. 1 Angelique Kerber in straight sets last night to advance to the semifinals of the Miami Open. By downing Kerber, the 36-year-old became the oldest player to defeat a world No. 1, but she has no desire to rest on that accomplishment....
Ichiro On Retirement: "I Think I'll Just Die"
Marlins outfielder/baseball’s True Hit King Ichiro Suzuki is 43 years old, yet he’s not going to stop playing professional baseball anytime in the forseeable future. Last year, he appeared in 143 games and hit .291, and even though the Marlins don’t plan to use him as an every-day starter, Ichiro wi...
Nick Kyrgios And Alexander Zverev Meet Again
Both kids passed their tests Tuesday in Miami, and now they’ll play each other for the second time ever....
These Roger Federer Volleys Almost Hurt To Watch
Roberto Batista Agut did about as well as you can do against the greatest these days, pushing him to two tiebreaks in the fourth round of the Miami Open, but, just, c’mon—these fucking nonchalant volleys....
James Johnson Did A Dunk Murder
The Miami Heat’s James Johnson dunked on Marcus Morris so hard in Tuesday’s game against the Pistons that Morris’s twin brother Markieff probably felt it, too....
Two Of Tennis's Best Young Guns Dismantled A Pair Of Hard-Serving Robots
Both Nick Kyrgios and Alexander Zverev, the two most promising players aged 21 or under, survived their third-round tests yesterday against two aging serve-bots. Neither win came easy. When your competition moves around the court with the grace of a mannequin but can still regularly whoop 130 mph ac...