mo Page 418 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Dwight Howard Says He Doesn't Take Jumpers Because Of A Crippling Fear Of Missing
Probable free agent Dwight Howard continued his soul-baring redemption tour, sitting down with ESPN’s Jackie MacMullan for an extensive interview. Anything about Howard that you’re interested in—his relationships with Stan Van Gundy, Kobe Bryant, and James Harden or his exits from Orlando, L.A., and...
Draymond Green Knees Steven Adams In The Dick And Balls
Draymond Green came up yapping at Steven Adams after the first play of the game, and halfway through the second quarter, the two clashed again, and Draymond accidentally (probably) kneed Steven in the Adamses while going up for a layup....
Only You Can Help Saddle This Minor League Baseball Team With A Dumb New Name
The Binghamton Mets, the AA affiliate of the New York Mets, have decided, as we briefly noted earlier today, that it’s time for the ballclub to forge boldly onward into the future and delineate their own identity outside of the influence of the mothership. This is noble and good, because minor leagu...
You Should See Europe By Car
I have never owned a car, and since my driver’s license expired at the beginning of this year, I have yet to have enough cause to motivate me to renew it. So, going by my personal experience, all I can really recommend when it comes to driving through Europe is that you should find a nice man who is...
Sixers Win NBA Draft Lottery They Claim Was Not Rigged And The Ghost Of The Process Lives
Despite all assurances that the Sixers did not know that they would win this evening’s draft lottery, the ping pong balls bounced in their favor, and they’ll get the first crack at next month’s NBA draft. Was it rigged? Who knows. All we can say now is that there is some convincing evidence that Dik...
Bill Simmons Introduces Himself to HBO Viewers With Worst <i>Bull Durham</i> Speech Ever
A year after his rude ouster from ESPN, you’re about to get a whole shitload of Bill Simmons back in your life, both at The Ringer (set to formally debut next month, although they’re already pumping out vital “Is Tom Hiddleston A Superstar?” takes on Facebook) and with his new HBO show, Any Given We...
Russell Wilson's Charming UW Commencement Address Was The Anti-Michael Jordan Hall Of Fame Speech
Look how chill that dude is right there. Twenty-seven years old, a Super Bowl winner, wearing a hoodie to a graduation ceremony at which he gave a funny, inspirational, self-effacing speech that also settled some scores with an old coach. This weekend in Madison, Russell Wilson—Seahawks QB, former W...
Richmond Beat Sydney Swans 101-100 On Kick After The Siren
One of Australian Rules Football’s many byzantine rules is that a player awarded a mark or a free kick as time expires may take a kick after the buzzer. Rarely, this kick can decide a game—but it did this morning as Richmond defeated Sydney Swans 101-100 thanks to Sam Lloyd’s perfect goal....
Make A Ham Sandwich, Dunk It In Cream Sauce, And Call It A Croque Monsieur
I often wonder whether the infamous French grouchiness isn’t born of resentment over the fact that the most fertile, bountiful turf in all of the Western world has given them only the third-best cuisine, behind both Spain and Italy. That’s gotta blow. Everything grows in France, and beautifully, and...
Bob Bradley's Le Havre Miss Out On Promotion To Ligue 1 By One Goal
Aww hell. Bob Bradley, former USMNT coach, took over French second-division club Le Havre in November and got the team off and running towards promotion to Ligue 1. Heading into today, Le Havre trailed Metz by three points and six goals. To make it to a top European league for the first time, Bradle...
You Have To Be Lucky To Be Rich
In 2007, Cornell economist Robert Frank wrote about President Barack Obama’s plan to let the Bush-era tax cuts for the country’s top earners lapse for the New York Times. He wrote that critics who complained that they had uniquely earned the money that would be taken away by stricter taxes were wron...
Can Tom Dumoulin Become The Most Unlikely Giro d'Italia Winner Of His Generation?
Cycling’s three-week Grand Tours are a sort of long, slowly unfolding lesson in the truth of Mike Tyson’s prophecy about how everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth. Every nine-man team charts out how they want their race to go, but 21-stage races are so chaotic that most get dashed ...
The Case Against Pets
Let’s talk about pets. They are made for cuddling. They nuzzle and purr and wiggle. They show their cute little bellies, asking for scratches. When we’re blue, they bring comfort. When they act like silly imbeciles, we make videos of them and share their antics with strangers on the internet. Pets g...
Brandon Laird Won Free Beer For A Year With This Dinger
Brandon Laird is a 28-year-old infielder who scuffled his way to a .197 average in 53 games for three teams in three years of Major League ball. He’s currently plying his craft in Japan for the Hokkaido Nippon-Ham Fighters, who are now my favorite NPB team because that name rules (the nickname is, s...
Raúl Mondesí Suspended 50 Games For PEDs
Top Kansas City Royals prospect Raúl Mondesí was suspended for 50 games Thursday, after testing positive for the performance enhancing drug clenbuterol. According to Mondesí, an over-the-counter flu medication he ingested in the Dominican Republic caused the positive:...
<i>X-Men: Apocalypse</i>'s Biggest Disappointment Is The Villainous Prune
As we’ve noted before, the pleasure of a superhero blockbuster lies in watching familiar, inevitable tropes refashioned in mildly refreshing ways. The people making these films are tasked not with outright originality but with clever recombination. How do we make the good guys defeat the bad guys—be...
Report: ESPN To Hire Randy Moss, Boot Ray Lewis And Cris Carter
Randy Moss will join ESPN, according to The Big Lead. The former NFL wide receiver was a pregame analyst for Fox Sports last season. The Worldwide Leader will reportedly shuffle off bapping analyst Cris Carter and NFL crime expert Ray Lewis....
Getting Angry Makes Almost Everything Worse
Broken news: people these days are angry about lots of stuff. This anger has manifested in varying degrees of badness and goodness, depending on your perspective: the ascent of Donald Trump, Black Lives Matter activism, comments sections anywhere at all....
We Have Found It, The Place All Hot Takes Are Born
Deep in the heart of Take Forest, at the peak of Mt. Take, lies the source of all takes....