mo Page 674 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
In Honor Of Memorial Day Weekend, Here's A Children's Treasury Of People Failing At The Art Of BBQ
Memorial Day is great: it's the unofficial beginning of summer, Jurassic Park 2 comes out if it's 1997, Saving Private Ryan is on somewhere, swimming in public bodies of water becomes socially acceptable again, and barbecue. All the wonderful barbecue....
Weekend Loser: Adam Jones
Orioles centerfielder Adam Jones was wrongly detained by Canadian authorities Thursday night in the first example of Canada's No Criminal Baseball Players Allowed rule, likely because he shares his name with a troublemaking footballer/video game....
Kendry Morales's Brittle Leg Teaches Us A Valuable Lesson About...Something
Someone in that Angels dugout is kicking themselves for not just simply wishing Morales "good luck" before coming to the plate in the tenth, instead of saying "break a leg." Ugh, that was terrible. I apologize....
Which One Of These Geniuses Do You Think Ran Onto Wrigley Field Yesterday?
"Dude" or "Sweet." Take your time. Think it over. Would "Dude," with his tilted hat, be brave enough to do it even though he doesn't appear to be wearing enough sunblock? Or will "Sweet" do the honors?...
Cockblocked By Fire Ants! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
The One Where Nyjer Morgan Poops In A Gatorade Bottle
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....
This Is What Orson Welles Sounds Like When He's Drunk
Here's a delightful set of outtakes from a Welles commercial for Paul Masson wines. As the old adage says: If the check clears, Orson Welles'll shill for your crappy products, but don't expect him to be sober doing it. [Pursuitlist via NYMag]...
<em>Space Jam</em>: Shameless Corporate Product, Or Sacred Creation Myth?
Everyone knows the timeless tale of Space Jam, in which our Lapine and human friends join forces to ward off the Moron Mountain Monstars. But does it have anything to do with the Mayans' most holy text? One scholar says...maybe....
North Korean Soccer Gear Is Must-Have Irony Of The Season
Your friend who always has to be "That Guy" is probably one of the many "collectors" searching for a DPRK soccer kit as we speak. Maybe you could score a game-worn in exchange for a loaf of bread. [WSJ]...
Simona Halep Loses The Boobs, Loses
Simona Halep did indeed show up to the French Open significantly less top-heavy than she was a year ago, but she still lost in the first round. Hey, you don't just bounce back from something like that. [Mirror/Daily Mail]...
It Appears 50 Cent Went On His Own Public Humiliation Diet
Mr. Cent went from a jacked 214 lbs. to 160 in nine weeks to play a cancer-stricken football player in "Things Fall Apart." It does not mention if he drank a fuckload of green tea. (H/T Gillin.) [ThisIs50]...
Here's An Indonesian Toddler Who Smokes 40 Cigs Per Day
Exasperated mum says: "He's totally addicted. If he doesn't get cigarettes, he gets angry and screams and batters his head against the wall. He tells me he feels dizzy and sick." Do they have 3-1-1 in Musi Banyuasin? [TheSun]...
Pukey Phillies Fan Cops A Plea; His Crazy Uncle Weighs In
Matthew Clemmens pleaded guilty today to assault; he's expected to receive probation. But the real news is that we heard back from his conspiracy theorist uncle!...
LeBron Watch, Day 5: Conspiracy! LeBron James Wants John Calipari To Be His Next Coach
Mike Brown is gone. So, what does LeBron James really want in his heart-of-hearts, that unknowable place the media have never seen? It couldn't be John Calipari, could it?...
Nolan Ryan Buys Texas Rangers (Who Still Owe A-Rod Money, By The Way)
The Texas Rangers declared bankruptcy today, which was merely a procedural matter on the road to a $575 million sale to team president/good 'ol boy Nolan Ryan and his group of investors. First step? Pay off some really lousy contracts....
Boston Radio Hosts Hang Up On Delonte-Banged-LeBron's Mom Rumor Monger
Although TerezOwens is gaining some national attention from his "Exclusive" LeBron scoop, 98.5 The Sports Hub's Toucher and Rich refuse to waste their time letting Terez stand by his Nigerian Prince sources. The last two minutes are highly amusing. [98.5SportsHubviaSRI]...
Mourinho Celebrates With Incredible Display Of Spitting
For those of you too busy pinking up your faces and sloshing back summertime pints, Jose Mourinho had a great night on Saturday, bagging another Champions League trophy, before celebrating with a home made water fountain. Some highlights after the jump....
Nyjer Morgan Could Swear He Heard A Whistle
Morgan makes a case for the first four-base error, deciding to spike his glove in a fit of rage — as the live ball sits on the warning track....
Sand Controversy Threatens To Underwhelm Eastern Conference Finals
Something — be it sand, grit, or poisonous acid worms — was spilled in the hallway outside the visitor's locker room at the Bell Centre yesterday. The Flyers aren't crying sabotage; but we will!...
Montauk Monster Has Hideous, Equally Baffling Canadian Cousin
A mysterious animal has washed up in a reservoir near the Kitchenuhmaykoosib Band reserve in northern Ontario, but no one can decide exactly what it is. Sound familiar?...