mo Page 698 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
What I've Learned
"Just a reminder, Ben Cohen is Deadspin's summer intern," A.J. wrote in May. "His time at Deadspin... is part of his educational and life experience. So consider yourselves all mentors." Well, I thought then, this should be fairly catastrophic....
The One With Assorted Handsy Photos And Absurd Complaints
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....
Your Weekly Throwgasm Breakdown: Pistachios, Apatow, Simmons, and Bees!
The week's ending. You need shit to do. Well, fear not. For I have compiled a list of worthy activities and/or ingestible chemicals to help you entertain yourself....
Starbury's Figurative Train Wreck Becomes A Literal Car Crash
We knew they shouldn't have let him outside. At the 1:45 mark, Stephon's car appears to jump the curb, or maybe run over an old lady. But "don't worry about it. It ain't nothin' but the Devil." [H/T reader Brian]...
Bill Simmons Is Still Coming To Terms With The Manny/Papi Steroid Revelations
"Of all the days for me to fly cross-country... I nominate this as my all-time worst finding news out on a blackberry moment." [SportsFellaTweets]...
Brees On Gitmo: "The Worst Thing We Can Do Is Shut That Baby Down"
Super Bowl winning quarterbacks go to Disney World, while an all-around good guy like Drew Brees scores an all-expenses-paid trip to Guantanamo Bay. Sounds dreamy, right? According to Brees, Gitmo ain't so bad....
Sources: With Favre's Decision, ESPN Will Have To Turn Elsewhere For Worthless Scoops
One of the many tragedies of Brett Favre's non-unretirement is that Ed Werder and Chris Mortensen, ESPN's Woodward and Bernstein of the small-bore, will no longer be feverishly working their anonymous sources for the world's most trivial Favre scoops....
Drew Bennett's Glorious Two-Day Run With The Ravens
On Friday, wide receiver Drew Bennett was healthy, rested and ready to play. So Baltimore gave him a one-year contract. Then he woke up on Sunday with a sore knee, so he retired. Didn't the Ravens call no takebacks?...
Hank Aaron's Convoluted Logic Could Put Pete Rose In The Hall Of Fame
Reports from baseball's Hall of Fame weekend say that Bud Selig is considering the possible reinstatement of Pete Rose, thanks in part to lobbying from current Hall members—i.e., arrogant and confused old men....
Marietta, Georgia Books Teen Girl Larceny Squad
CHEERLEADER! SO AND SO! WHAT'S HER FACE! THE UNDERAGE ONE! They've all been charged with stealing $149 from two little girls....
Nate Montana Finds Better Football Situation Than Notre Dame
Joe Montana's son has seen Rudy. He knows how this works. First you go to junior college, THEN you try out for Notre Dame....
Yankees And Patriots Are Selling Fake Jerseys
Okay, not the sports teams, but the more accurately described group — our soldiers — are being accused of buying fake memorabilia in Korea and reselling them....
And Then A Not-So-Mighty Dong Appeared...
Unfortunately named Georgia Bulldogs quarterback Joe Cox appears in a Sporting News Today spread and it appears 1. he forgot to wear a cup, and 2. the magazine forgot to airbrush out his flaccid penis showing through his pants. (NSFW?)...
The NFL Draft Goes After <i>Grey's Anatomy</i>'s Territory
The excruciatingly long NFL Draft will expand to three days in 2010, with the first round airing Thursday, the most-watched night of television. Roger Goodell against Meredith Grey, the lead in CSI and Liz Lemon? That's a dealbreaker, ladies. [PFT]...
CFL Lineman Sacks Purse Snatcher On Streets Of Edmonton
Because we all need to believe in the power of sport again, here's a story involving an athlete that has a happy ending. If reading about a thief get crunched by a professional football player makes you happy, that is....
The Sports Fella Has Tremendous Upside On Mediaite Power Grid
He'll have that green arrow next to his portrait in no time after this miniature mailbag of an interview. The word cloud: Twitter, fad, ESPN, think, stories, nervous, immediacy, Letterman, saying, blog, better. [Mediaite/Wordle]...
Reports Of MMA Fighter's Death Greatly Exaggerated
Fight fans were saddened yesterday to learn that veteran slugger Kim Leopoldo had passed away at the age of 41. So young! The news was especially hard on Leopoldo since he was under the impression that he was still alive....
The (Mobile) Internet Is For Porn
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Simmons Bids Farewell To <em>ESPN The Magazine</em>
After seven years, the Sports Fella is taking down his shingle at ESPN The Periodical. His final column is a nice tribute to his father (at left), who wrote Huck Finn. [ESPN]...
The Agony Of Upkeep
There are many shitty things about growing old. But here's one of the shittiest: paying lots of money simply to maintain the shit you already have....