nan Page 75 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Mets Broadcast Booth Can't Stop Giggling About Pasties
Carlos Gonzalez’s eye black led to a complete breakdown in the SNY booth tonight as Gary Cohen, Ron Darling, and Keith Hernandez lost all ability to communicate over the concept of pasties....
San Diego Offers $350 Million In Public Money For A New Chargers Stadium, NFL Wants More
You don’t even have to be particularly cynical to believe the NFL doesn’t actually want a team in Los Angeles—it just loves having the helpful L.A. bogeyman around to blackmail cities into throwing taxpayers’ millions at owners to get them to stay. St. Louis has done its part, waving $400 million in...
<i>Conan the Barbarian</i> Is Schwarzenegger At His Darkest, And Maybe Best
There’s a moment, early in Conan the Barbarian, when Arnold Schwarzenegger is wandering around some ancient city, high on some mysterious substance, giggling with his Mongol archer sidekick. He takes a few steps backwards and then stumbles into a camel. Without really looking at what he’s doing, he ...
Please Let This Be The Last Fantastic Four<i> </i>Movie
1. You know, until everybody turns into a superhero, the new Fantastic Four reboot isn’t half bad. You can see what they were trying to do. We watch four ambitious, incredibly smart young kids come together to work on a science project that has the potential to change the world; they’re played by so...
Fernando Rodney Hides In Shrubbery, Might Actually Be An Elf
It hit 93 degrees in Denver today, and with the sun beating down through the thin Rockies air, Mariners closer Fernando Rodney decided to take a short siesta in the Swill Beer Field shrubbery:...
Meryl Streep Rocks Out: <i>Ricki And The Flash</i> Could've Been Worse
Ricki and the Flash could’ve easily been yet another broad, obvious dysfunctional-family comedy. It’s right there in the setup: A middle-aged woman who years ago abandoned her buttoned-down Midwestern husband and kids to be a rock ’n’ roll star must now make amends, setting up a feel-good redemption...
D.A.: Aaron Hernandez And Tipster Had "Sexually Explicit Relationship"
Yes, there’s still legal wrangling over Aaron Hernandez’s guilty conviction in the murder of Odin Lloyd. This particular spat is about a tipster who anonymously called one of Hernandez’s defense lawyers multiple times, claiming one of the jurors might have been “untruthful.” For example, she said th...
Judge Rules Rams Can Build Publicly Financed Stadium Without A Vote
Thanks to a judge’s ruling, the St. Louis Rams are one step closer to fleecing the residents of St. Louis for hundreds of millions of dollars....
Somebody Fucked With The Spurs Jesus
When Spurs Jesus got burglarized last month, he didn’t turn the other cheek, and he didn’t forgive his (literal) trespassor. Because he’s not actually Jesus, he’s just a weird San Antonio fan who pretends to be Christ. ...
How To Make Perlo, The Deep South's Best Take On Chicken And Rice
Here’s the thing about South Carolina: if you drive far enough inland from the ocean, you will run out of fingers on which to count highway billboards threatening you with ultimatums like “Accept Jesus Or Burn In Hell.” Not a whole lot to recommend the place once you get out of earshot of the surf....
The David Foster Wallace Movie Gets Our Vision Of Him Right, At Least
The End of the Tour, a drama about a five-day interview/road trip that took place between novelist David Foster Wallace and Rolling Stone reporter David Lipsky in 1996, has already received significant pushback from those closest to the late author, who committed suicide in 2008. Wallace’s estate an...
No Hops-Having Keeper Lets Pass Bounce Over His Head For An Own Goal
You had three options here, goalkeeper: 1) run out to the incoming back pass and meet it right after it bounces, 2) step back a few steps and take the ball off your chest after it took that towering though perfectly predictable skip off the turf, 3) loiter around in the box and find yourself standin...
The New <i>Mission: Impossible </i>Is Almost Better Than The New <i>Mad Max</i>
1. I think if the Mission: Impossible franchise starred anyone other than Tom Cruise, we’d regard all these movies as classics. All five have been excellent in their own ways, but unlike any other franchise I can think of, each sequel is better than its predecessor. Each has a different director, an...
The Lifeless <i>Vacation </i>Reboot Is All Bowels And No Heart
1. The original 1983 National Lampoon’s Vacation is a classic because deep down, it’s essentially a sweet movie. The screenplay was written by John Hughes—based off the short story “Vacation ’58,” which he wrote about a family trip to Disneyworld, and which ultimately got him on the staff of Nationa...
The Diamondbacks Are Still Jerks
Former GM Kevin Towers and Kirk “Grit Lord” Gibson aren’t around to urge players to throw baseballs at people in meaningless acts of revenge, but that doesn’t mean the Diamondbacks have totally done away with the Hard Baseball Man ethos. See last night’s game against the Marlins....
Does Jimmer Fredette Have A Chance In Hell In San Antonio?
Every so often, as the last dregs of NBA free agency congeal into place, a name floats across the ticker that gives a little shock of Oh, what ever happened to ... ? pause. Last night, it was Jimmer Fredette signing on, with minimal guarantees, to be a San Antonio Spur. And, begging your pardon, con...
The Super-Macho <i>Southpaw </i>Is Trying Way Way Way Too Hard
If you know one thing about Southpaw, which tells the story of a champion boxer who loses everything and fights to get most of it back, it’s that its star, Jake Gyllenhaal, went through a crazy training regimen to prepare for the role. It comes up in every interview, and winds up being the focal poi...
<i>Pixels </i>Is Adam Sandler's Laziest Movie Yet, Somehow
1. Pixels is a perfectly acceptable idea for a movie that has unfortunately been Sandlerized. Based off a famous short film from 2010 that you can watch below—and you probably should just watch now, for free, thereby saving yourself the trip to the theater—it revolves around aliens who receive a tim...
Bucks Co-Owner Now Works For Governor Who Pushed Through Arena Deal
Last week, the Wisconsin Senate approved $250 million—and at least $174 million more in interest—in public funds to build the Milwaukee Bucks a new arena. The plan was championed at every step of the way by Gov. Scott Walker, who has designs on the White House. His war chest will be administered by ...