nas Page 139 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It Is Time, Once Again, To Wank For A Cause
It's the news you dared not hope was true: Nearly 10 years after it was introduced in San Francisco, the Masturbate-A-Thon is making its triumphant return. To The Netherlands! What took you so long, Dutch people? (Carl Monday dons raincoat, sounds the Action 4 News Team alert). Oh, like you had anyt...
Ohio State Cheaux (Again)
Dan Shanoff, college football columnist for Deadspin, reflects on LSU's big win over Ohio State last night in the BCS championship game. Email him to let him know what you think....
If Someone Had To Be Called "Champ," Might As Well Be LSU
We hope LSU fans do not take it as an insult that hardly anyone considers their title legitimate; every season has to crown one champion, however the champion is crowned, and LSU is fortunate enough to be that team. More power to them; they deserve it, we supposed. But let's skip the charade....
Finally Time To Put The College Football Season To Rest
OK, we are finally here. The college football season, at last, ends tonight in New Orleans. You know it's an important game in a SERIOUS locale, because they've put the cheerleaders to work. It's Ohio State vs. LSU, for something weird thing we're calling a "national championship." Or something. En...
Happy Birthday, Gilbert
Seeing as how he's injured (and might not be back) you may not know that today is Gilbert Arenas's birthday, and therefor, it is the first anniversary of the coolest birthday party I've ever attended. It's also worth noting that it was the only reason that thesetwo photo-ops were able to take place...
STEPHEN A. SMITH APPROVES OF STEPHEN A. SMITH'S BARCALOUNGER
Sometimes we worry that we are putting together unfair, cartoonish caricatures of some of our favorite sports personalities, that there are subtleties to them that we are missing. We worry about this; we worry about a lot. But then we come across this piece of news about Stephen A. Smith....
Fumble! Everybody On It, Including Stepsons
By now, you've probably heard about Chris Jessie, Mack Brown's stepson who stupidly grabbed a loose fumble last night during Texas' thumping of Arizona State in the Holiday Bowl. It's pretty entertaining....
SHOTY Elite Eight: Elijah Dukes Vs. Gilbert Arenas
At last, we have completed the endless first round of the 2007 Sportshuman Of The Year tournament. It only took a month. Now we're down the nitty-gritty: The Elite Eight....
EVERY GAME I RECAP IS IMPORTANT!
The NBA Closer is now written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores, he can be heard on The Basketball Jo— WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, FALL BACK, BLOGGER! FALL. BACK. IT'S ABOUT TIME THAT A RESPECTED JOURNALIST, SUCH AS MYSELF, DO THIS POST SOME GOOD! SO W...
Stephen A. Smith Imagines A Utopian Society Without Bloggers
It's the question that has plagued scientists for the better part of a decade: Is there life inside of Stephen A. Smith's head? It would be foolish to rule it out ... after all, life can take many forms, including the smallest of single-cell organisms. But as of now, NASA has no plans beyond sendi...
Whatever Choice Was Made, It Was Going To Be Wrong
We enjoy this picture of Georgia center Fernando Velasco, taken after the Bulldogs' win over Georgia Tech Saturday, because he is holding an orange. Presumably, a fan through him — and some other Bulldogs — an orange to symbolize the Orange Bowl. This is odd not because Georgia is not going to the O...
Really, When You Think About It, Aren't We ALL Winners?
LSU coach Les Miles, who might be checking out this job posting, wants to make it clear that if college football didn't play overtime, his team would still be undefeated!...
SHOTY First Round: Gilbert Arenas Vs. Steely McBeam
It's SHOTY frenzy this week; two in two days. You now can spend your Thanksgiving playing around with online polls. Fun!...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch when not even Subserviant Chicken will obey your requests ... • College football: Hawaii at Nevada. Honolulu and Reno ... practically identical in every way. [ESPN2] • College basketball: 2K Sports College Hoops Classic, at New York, third-place game; Championship game (Memphis vs. UCo...
Please Keep Roger Clemens At The Forefront Of Your Brain
One would have thought, after that "ow, my hamstring, I have to LEAVE!" display by Roger Clemens in the ALDS last month, the "Rocket," as they call him, would finally realize it's better to leave well enough alone. But no: Even though he's happy to take that "services contract" from the Astros — one...
The Mavericks Invite You To Eat Their Dust
Those of you constantly demanding to see Dirk Nowitzki leaning out of a car window while taking a lap at the Texas Motor Speedway can stop your letters and e-mails: Your wish has finally been granted. Of course now that I see it, I have the urge to jump in the car and take my dog for a drive. Come'...
Agent Zero, Care to Speak Freely?
Gilbert Arenas offers up his refreshing honesty to Sports Illustrated writer Ian Thomsen about life as an NBA-er, being an unabashed weirdo, and the problem-players that inhabit the league. You know, like, Tim Thomas....
A Look At Steve Nash
We're dangerously close to the start of the NBA season, with all its drama and months of madness. To us, part of the beauty of the NBA is that its focus, while ultimately on the team, falls on the individual. The plight of one player becomes an epic tale in the shadow of Jordan; who is the real alph...
When Assimilation Goes Wrong: Negro NASCAR
You may remember The Assimilated Negro from his Negro Bowl I coverage for us last year. He returns to us to discuss NASCAR's odd decision to try to Negro-ize their sport....