NBA Page 581 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Sports Fella's Dream Is Dead
Minnesota picks ex-Pacers GM David Kahn to run their basketball operations. "I promise that nobody will outwork or outthink us as we build one of the best front offices in the league and a team that begins a climb to the top." They should put that on a plaque. [NBA.com]...

Suspiciously Optimistic Guy In Warriors Forum Turns Out To Be Warriors Flack
So that anonymous optimist who's been dropping sunshine all over the Warriorsworld forums? Goes by "Flunkster Dude"? Posts things like, "Nice job Mully!"? Why, he's none other than Warriors PR director, Raymond Ridder....

The Sordid Life Of Clippers Owner Donald Sterling
Just in time for the lottery, ESPN The Magazine has a look-see at the walking abomination known as Donald Sterling, Clippers owner and a man of discerning taste. Dislikes: blacks, Mexicans, children. Likes: Koreans, blowjobs....

Clippers To Ruin Blake Griffin's Life
Los Angeles Clippers president Andy Roeser is in loooove with Blake Griffin and since his team won the NBA Draft Lottery, the Oklahoma forward will likely be next to join that house of horrors. He was such a nice boy too. [AP]...

Dirk Nowitzki's Lady Friend Gives Jailhouse Interview
Cristal Taylor has given her first jailhouse interview, stating that yes, she was engaged to Dirk Nowitzki; no, he hasn't called; and you bet your ass, she's pregnant....

Which NBA Wife Packs Her Husband's Condoms When He Goes On Road Trips?
A non-sequitur of a post on bizarro world sports site MomLogic appears to be an anonymous confession from a "realistic" sports widow who knows what side her road beef is buttered on....

NBA.com - The Game Happens Here
Click Here for the most extensive Playoff coverage, in depth highlights, up to date scores, stats and schedules from the post season. NBA.com - The Game Happens Here....

Kenyon Martin and Mark Cuban: Still Bellyaching
Their series is over, but Mark Cuban and Kenyon Martin are still sniping at each other in the press. I think La La should slap them both in the mouth. [Hoops Hype]...

YouTube: Where Enjoyable Parodies Happen
I solemnly swear never to get sick of these send-ups of the NBA's "Where Will Amazing Happen This Year?" commercials....

Here's The Video From Corie Blount's Sentencing Hearing
Complete with the judge's "Cheech and Chong" line (starting at the 0:50 mark) that gave Chris McKendry quite the case of the giggle fits....

Wayman Tisdale Dies At Age 44
The Oklahoma Sooner, 12-year NBA veteran, and "smooth jazz" guitarist passed away this morning after a two-year battle with bone cancer. [Oklahoman]...

Darius Miles Does Not Know How To Keep A Low Profile
Grizzlies forward Darius Miles was arrested yesterday after cops found marijuana in his car during a traffic stop, but some people are wondering if maybe the car itself is a little too conspicuous....

Tony Banks On Dirk Nowitzki's Lady Friend: I Know That "Chick"
Former NFL QB Tony Banks says he remembers Crystal Taylor—Dirk Nowitzki's jailed "girlfriend"—because she tried to scam him almost ten years ago. He's got quite a tale to tell....

Rockets and Lakers: It's About To Get Nasty
After losing yet another starter, the Rockets are about to try to prove that they can win without Yao. If Ron Artest can keep himself from getting ejected, they might have a shot....

Carmelo Anthony Hits Game-Winning Three, All Hell Breaks Loose
Chaos in Dallas last night as Melo hit a game winner, Mark Cuban passed on some Mother's Day greetings, and Josh Howard channeled his inner Hulk....

Yao Breaks His Foot, Done for the Year
The Houston Rockets announced yesterday evening that Yao Ming will be out for the rest of the playoffs with a hairline fracture in his left foot. Adjust your bets accordingly....

Feuding Reporters Briefly Enliven Terrible Cavs-Hawks Series
NBA playoffs-related journalist slap-fight!...

John Tesh Offers You $20K To Rap-Dribble-And Dance Your Way To Total Humiliation
And you'd also like the chance for your equally inept rhyming abilities to earn you exciting cash and prizes? Yeah, we can hook you up with that. Please wear a helmet before viewing to ensure the mess from your brain's imminent, messy explosion doesn't stain the wallpaper. And we'll even get you sta...

Why Did Kareem Only Hustle In The Playoffs?
Can statistics prove that the NBA regular season is a tedious neverending slog that not even the lazy players can be bothered to care about? [Slate]...

Bow Down Before Your New Mayor, Detroiters
Piston legend Dave Bing has been elected to serve the remainder of Kwame "Sex Text" Kilpatrick's term as Lord of The D. I hear he plans to move the city to Ontario. [Detroit News; photo]...