new Page 1053 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Kool Aid Man Really Wanted To Catch That Foul Ball
Your morning roundup for Aug. 23, the day they found a lot of semen in a fancy hotel room. H/T to bigsombrero for the photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

The Only Thing Worse Than A Drake Song Is A DeJuan Blair Cover Of A Drake Song
Unlike his NBA brethren, who are working at the local Home Depots, assistant coaching at Division I schools, and throwing down in local leagues, Spurs forward DeJuan Blair is apparently spending his extended off-season recording covers of terrible pop songs that are a mere two months old....

Sabermetrix Are For Kids: Introducing Our Little League World Series Power Ranking And Prediction Engine
We're a few days into the Little League World Series, which means it's time to unveil our system for evaluating the teams: DRURY, or Determination of Robustness of Undoubtedly Rambunctious Youths. It takes box score statistics from every game, converts them into a composite runs scored and allowed p...

School Of Fight: Learning To Brawl With The Hockey Goons Of Tomorrow (Deadspin Classic)
Last week, Glenn Stout, editor of Houghton Mifflin's Best American Sports Writing series, announced the lineup for the 2011 edition of the book. Among the stories was Jake Bogoch's dispatch from a notorious hockey fight camp for kids, where our writer took a teenager's punch to the kidneys and found...

Jimmy Rollins Is Going On The DL, According To Jimmy Rollins
Guess the Phillies' PR staff can pretty much take the afternoon off....

Bobby Valentine Has It In For Starlin Castro
Starlin Castro, the young, hopeful face of the Cubs franchise this season, pissed off Bobby Valentine in a game against the Cardinals last night, and nothing good came out of it—unless you have a general appreciation for seven-minute rants on five-second occurrences in the middle of your baseball ...

Idea For New Reality Show Featuring Barry Bonds Is 10 Years Too Late
So it turns out Barry Bonds is actually "close friends" with A.C. Slater, who got him to agree to do a reality show in which we get to see baseball's all-time asterisk king confronted by an angry fan who despises him, after which Bonds will have to try to convince the poor jagoff he's not such a pr...

ESPN's Ian O'Connor Confuses His Job Duties With Eli Manning's
Did you hear what Plaxico Burress did at the Meadowlands last night? He did nothing. The ESPN.com caption this morning was "Plaxico Burress shines in his first game back in the NFL, scoring a touchdown against the Bengals on Sunday." This is a stupid lie, born of boredom and fraud: Burress's first g...

What ESPN Will Be Talking About Today: Plaxico Catching A Football In A Pretend Game
A new feature in which we condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

ESPN Is Airing This TV Commercial For Grantland
Huh. It's like Jim Jarmusch meets The Sting meets a Klondike bar....

The Cool Kids Will Now Be Sitting At Bleacher Report's Lunch Table: A Slideshow
Introducing your new Bleacher Report "National Lead Writers" ......

Who's Got 41? Great. But Who's Got 41?
Your morning roundup for Aug. 22, the day we asked taxpayers to foot the bill for a shopping mall. Photo via @EricStangel. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. ...

Here's Video Of The Time Gunfire Interrupted A Mexican Soccer Match
Per @rev215: "Here's bad quality video of players running off the field & fans taking cover as shots are fired in Mexican soccer game"...

Let's Watch Oscar's Hat Trick In Brazil's 3-2 U20 World Cup Win, But Especially The Third Goal
Oscar's 111th-minute U20 World Cup winning strike was really something to see. Fast forward to 10:45. Rejoice in the magic. Then, watch the rest. Brazil 3, Portugal 2....

Spanish Soccer Club Goes The Sperm-Bank Porn Route To Sell Season Tickets (NSFW)
It's probably difficult to cultivate much of a season-ticket fan base when you're a soccer team in the Madrid suburbs. This is Getafe FC's burden. This is Getafe FC's blessing....

Watch Shaq And His Ladyfriend Do Parlor Tricks Involving Smoke
Bet Flavor Flav couldn't figure out how Shaq 'n Hoopz's bit of smoky magic came to be. (H/T The Hoop Doctors)...

Here's Video Of A Pack Of Young Ladies Robbing A D.C. Convenience Store
Per MyFoxDC, "Another flash mob robbery has occurred in the area, this time at a convenience store ... Surveillance video from the Shop Express Convenience Store shows that there were 10 young women involved....

For Trivia-Contest Purposes, It's Best To Remember Seattle Isn't In California
During last night's Syracuse Chiefs 5-2 victory over the Gwinnett Braves, two fans vied to win a foam finger in a "Smarter Than An Intern" trivia contest. The secret question (paraphrased): Name the 13 professional sports franchises in California. With the eighth pick, one competitor chose the Sea...

In Retrospect, It's More Of A Shock That Tom Brady Wasn't An Uggs Spokesmodel Sooner
The Names Blog, brought to you by the Boston Globe, presents this image under the headline, "Brady looks rather manly in his new Ugg boots." Doesn't he though? ...

It's Only The Second Week Of NFL Preseason Games, And Todd Haley Is Already Pissed Off
The Baltimore Ravens defeated the Kansas City Chiefs 31-13 last night. That final score was seasoned with two Ravens touchdowns in the final two minutes....