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An Attempted Translation Of DeSean Jackson's Twitter Response To That Whole Gay-Slur Issue Thing (Updated)
Last evening, Philadelphia Eagles WR DeSean Jackson, who is embroiled in a slurmantic battle over his use of the phrase "gay-ass faggot," put his thoughts on the record about said controversy. ...

Deadspin I-Team: Who's That Guy Who Stands To Make Some Coin Off Of Jeter's 3,000th Hit? (UPDATED)
Here he is, in left field, his paw wrapped around Derek Jeter's home-run ball. Do your work, I-Team....

Derek Jeter Just Became The 28th MLB Player To Reach 3,000 Career Hits
Third inning. 3-2 count. Home Run off of Tampa Bay Rays pitcher David Price. Ties the game at one. All hugs and smiles at home plate....

BREAKING DEREK JETER ALMOST-NEWS!
In the first inning of today's game against Tampa Bay, New York Yankee Derek Jeter grounded a single through the left side of the infield for his 2,999th career hit. He'll become the 28th player in baseball history to reach the milestone with his next hit. [ESPN]...

Here's Video Of A Reckless Aussie Getting Gored And Trampled In Pamplona
When you go to a bullfight in Spain as a 10(ish)-year-old who wasn't forewarned that animals will bleed profusely while getting dragged out of the arena to their deaths, the end result is this: The annual footage of human injury and pain from Pamplona's Running of the Bulls is a source of joy....

John "Fancy Lime-Green Pants" Daly Needed 13 Shots On A Par-Four Hole Yesterday
Per GolfWeek, "One drive into thick grass ended John Daly's hopes of making the cut for the first time at the event. Daly needed seven shots, each advancing his ball only a few feet, and a drop to get out of the rough right of the No. 4 fairway ... He had stepped to the tee at 2 under for the tour...

Concussed Cyclist Doesn't Remember Finishing Yesterday's Stage Of The Tour De France
Your morning roundup for July 9, the day Detroit teaches us to respect the crackheads who walk among us....

Tony Parker: "Lockout? Wheeee!"
If summer vacation could last forever, Tony Parker would never come down. [via TBJ]...

Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To The Ballplayer's Twilight
Every Friday, SportsFeat picks a few great weekend reads for Deadspin. In honor of Derek Jeter and his labored quest for 3,000 hits, here are well-told stories of ballplayers just before, in the years after, or at the exact moment they retired....

Matt Leinart Is Totally Working Out Every Day For When The Lockout Ends, You Guys
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the free agent on his freedom....

Here's John Sterling and Clyde Frazier Calling A 1989 Hawks-Bulls Game
Walt "Clyde" Frazier and John Sterling, for better or worse, respectively, are two of New York's most recognizable sportscasters. Sterling has called literally every Yankees game in my lifetime, and Frazier has been on Knicks games even longer. Putting these men in a booth together in 2011 would b...

Exclusive: We've Obtained Audited Financials For The NFL League Office
These are audited financial statements for the NFL's league office, the nerve center of professional football, covering the years ended March 31, 2009, and March 31, 2010. The documents below deal with only one piece of NFL operations, and there aren't any obviously mind-melting revelations about th...

Of Rangers And Railings
The death of Shannon Stone, the man who died after falling at Rangers Ballpark, had personal meaning for me. As a kid, I had an irrational, omnipresent fear that I would trip and fall while descending the aisle in the upper deck, and go over the edge. Especially at Shea Stadium, where the stairs wer...

Presenting The Two Most Preposterous Sentences Ever Written About Derek Jeter, As Of 11:06 A.M. Today
Would you like to read the two silliest sentences ever written about Derek Jeter in the mainstream press? Two sentences so silly that if you told me someone had liberated all the drunk tanks within the Beltway and set the good folks loose inside whatever inflatable bouncer passes for the USA Today n...

Mike Holmgren Weighs In On The Santa Cruz Dog-Ban Issue
The 35-year-old ban on dogs in downtown Santa Cruz could come to an end next week. Dog owners have money, and the business owners want it. Asked a leading are-you-surprised-there's-a-ban question by KSBW's Phil Gomez, Mike Holmgren of Scotts Valley said, "I'm a little surprised. I didn't know that,...

A Fan Fell To His Death At Tonight's Rangers/A's Game
A firefighter watching the Rangers/A's game with his young son tonight asked Texas outfielder Josh Hamilton for a foul ball just hit by Oakland's Conor Jackson in the top of the second inning. He tumbled over the railing, fell about 20 feet onto a concrete level and was pronounced dead at the hospit...

Here's A Picture Of A Boob Getting Grabbed At Fenway
This photo comes from tipster Matthew M. who notes, "Jerry Remy and his broadcast partner lost their shit after the couples they were talking about got a little randy....

He Apologized For His Unacceptable Behavior!
"Hey everyone. I'm taking this time to apologize for my involvement with the post game riots after the Bruins defeated the Canucks to take the Stanley Cup. My involvement was a bad decision I made in the heat of the moment and it something that i feel a profound sense of regret towards. I would li...

Here's Your Commemorative Keepsake Poster Of The Sun Pornographically Manipulating A Thermometer
In consulting with the National Weather Service and American Red Cross, two USA Today graphic artists apparently found a way to illustrate the dangerous dog-days of summer as a sun blowing and tightly gripping a thermomedong....
