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Merciful Jesus May Be Ready To End Teixeira Drama
Mark Teixeira supposedly about to sign with someone, but no ones knows with whom, or for how much. So let's pretend it's the Mets. [SI.com]...

Do Not Challenge Shaun Ellis To A Snowball Fight
Here's one more little tidbit, from the winter wonderland that was Week 16 in the NFL....

What Hockey Really Needs Is Better Manners
Ok, technically, using this spin-o-rama move on a penalty/shootout shot is not illegal—because it explicitly says so in the rule book. (Seriously, the NHL rule book contains the word "spin-o-rama." Amazing.) So it's fair ... but is it nice? The Devils' Bobby Holik doesn't think so....

Detroit Columnist Manages To Piss Off Just About Everyone
Detroit News columnist Rob Parker says he was just joking when he asked Lions head coach Rod Marinelli if he "wishes his daughter had married a better defensive coordinator?" Wow. Some joke....

Manny Hints At Possible Three-Year Deal With Yankees
Manny Ramirez has no comment on latest rumor of possible Manny Ramirez-Yankees deal reported by Manny Ramirez. [Yahoo Sports]...

Queer Eye For The Snow Guy
This is clearly the best snowman ever built, anywhere; it looks exactly like its subject. I just pray that the guy in the Lofa Tatupu jersey isn't preparing to affix a second carrot....

LeBron: Don't Start Printing Those #23 Knicks Jerseys Just Yet
Not sure if you've heard, but the summer of 2010 is a rather important one in the NBA....

C.C. Sabathia Already Managing Expectations
C.C. Sabathia was introduced to the New York media yesterday, which is generally not an interesting moment in a player's career, but there was one little nugget of information that may hint at trouble....

Did The Red Sox Bandit Strike Again?
Did the Red Sox Bandit don his shiny new hanging sox logo cap and hit another bank on Thursday? Sure looks like it. And once again the so-called Batman does nothing....

Joe Horn Only Pawn In Game Of Life
As reported yesterday, the Giants brought Joe Horn in for a workout, acting as if they might actually sign the 36-year-old receiver for the stretch run, but Joe Horn says ... he was used....

Mets Welcome Redundant, Gramatically Questionable Triple-A Team
The New York Mets' Triple-A affiliate is now located in Buffalo, where it had been previously associated with the Cleveland Indians. But, I thought the plural of Bison was Bison? [New York Daily News]...

Yankees Want Manny, Building Ark For Rest Of Acquisitions
Yankees going hard to the hoop on Manny Ramirez ... three years, $25 million per year? May include a share of Madonna. [New York Daily News]...

New Red Sox Logo A Hit Among Males 15-25, Bank Robbers
New Red Sox promotional slogan for 2009: We're Armed And Should Be Considered Dangerous ... or, Wanted In Connection With Fun And Excitement!...

Stephon Marbury Just Can't Stop Smiling, Making Knicks Uncomfortable
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call needs your help. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call...

Giants Honk The Horn?
The silver lining in the Plaxico Burress saga? Joe Horn is (maybe) back, baby! [NJ Star-Ledger]...

Plaxico Is Gonna Need A Bigger Boat!
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Mets To Be Rescued By The Power Of Booze And Mr. Celery?
Long Island Booze Baron Martin Silver is riding to the rescue to buy the New York Mets, whom he's sure are broke, so that they "don't fall into the wrong hands." Like, with someone who doesn't taunt people with poultry?...

Mets Broke Due To Madoff Scandal? Let's Do The Math
Forgive New York Mets fans if they're not swelling with pride over being connected to one of the biggest investment frauds in the history of money. But will the Madoff Scandal affect the Mets' ability to sign players?...

Andy Pettitte's Secret Santa
Who is the "mystery team" offering Andy Pettitte three years and $36 million? Let me ride my unicorn over to my crystal ball to find out. [NJ.com]...

A Night Out With (A Presumably Unarmed) Plaxico
Here's Plaxico Burress, looking none the worse for wear — but sitting down, of course — at Kevin Powell’s 8th Annual Holiday Party and Clothing Drive at the Madison nightclub on Friday night....