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Free Darko On New Orleans-Dallas
We're looking at every NBA Playoff series through the eyes of both Free Darko and Basket Bawful. Here's Free Darko's look at the New Orleans Hornets-Dallas Mavericks series. Your author is Bethlehem Shoals....

Goodbye, Isiah. We Shall Never Meet Another Like You
The NBA Playoffs schedule is all set, and we'll certainly be overflowing with coverage and discussion and all you might expect from your sports blog, but we really need to start today off with a eulogy. At some point today, if it hasn't happened already (and the ESPNews crawl seems to think so), Is...

Do Protective Cups Even Help Any More?
In Saturday's 5-4 loss to the Capitals, the Flyers' Patrick Thoresen attempted to block a shot with his body and ended up getting drilled with the puck. But, unlike the thousands of other times this occurs during a hockey season, Thoresen got hit with the puck right in the peach basket, which dente...

Counting Down Isiah's Final Hours
The New York Knicks' season ends tomorrow night, in Indiana, but the official/unofficial goodbye to Isiah Thomas was in the Garden last night, with the Knicks losing to the Celtics' second stringers. It's all coming to an end, Mal. Our Sports Human Of The Year has just a few hours left of employmen...

The Pope Should Wipe His Feet Before Entering Yankee Stadium
The Pope turns 81 years old today — 10 years older than John McCain, and just three years older than Julio Franco — and he's celebrating it in Washington, D.C. with President Bush. (What better way?) He will be celebrating mass at the new Nationals Stadium, which means we're going to assume Elijah D...

New York Now Free From The Menace Of Buried Cloth
There have been a little more than 9,000 unsolved murders in New York City since 1985; many of the victims buried in cement, do doubt. But thank God we've solved this case: The Yankees have dug up a Red Sox jersey on Sunday that had been planted beneath their new stadium by a construction worker. An...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while patiently waiting for Tiger to turn it up a notch... • MLB: New York Yankees at Boston Red Sox. Sigh [ESPN] • Hockey: New Jersey Devils at New York Rangers and San Jose Sharks at Calgary Flames. [Versus] • Animation: The Simpsons. Thank god. [FOX]...

South Park, Cheating, And You
“In America, it’s OK to cheat as long as you cheat your way to the top.” What does Stand and Deliver have in common with Bill Belichick? South Park explains....

Observations From Opening Night At Shea
We attended our first baseball game of the season last night, a sloppy, ugly, slightly comical 8-2 Mets win over the Phillies. We tried to attribute it to a cold April night, but seriously, we're not sure the Phillies were actually wearing gloves....

Shea Stadium Fans Disagree With The Internet
As you might have seen by now, the Mets really were "Rick Rolled" yesterday with the playing of Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up" at Shea Stadium. If they're going by crowd reaction to decided what the permanent winner is … it doesn't looks good for Mr. Astley....

Back When Men Were Men, And The Prose Was Purple
Slate's Robert Weintraub, like many of us, loves the old purple prose of early 1900s sportswriting, the Red Smiths, the Grantland Rices, the men who painted epic tales of warriors, grizzled combatants and lardywarks too manly to wear gloves. In an occasional series, Weintraub writes about the week's...

We Will Never Give Up Rick Astley
Last week, we encouraged everyone to vote for The Eagles Of Death Metal to be played at Mets games this year. We clearly backed the wrong horse; it appears Rick Astley has won the competition. Kind of....

Stanley Cup Preview: The Fours Meet The Fives
NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski previews the 2008 Stanley Cup Finals right up until they drop what is commonly referred to as "the puck."...

That Buzzing In Your Heart? It's A Hornets Nest. Trust Me.
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who can't believe it's only two weeks until the NBA playoffs. When he's requesting a two-month leave of absence from work so he can watch every playoff game, you can find him building a lint ball at Basketbawful. Enjoy! Out. Of. Gas. Memo to Don Nelson: Thi...


The Best $187 Million Ever Spent
As Isiah Thomas and the Knicks attempt to finish up their disastrous season and wait to find out what new GM Donnie Walsh will do to rejuvenate the team, it'd probably be a good idea to make sure he doesn't read this Portfolio.com article on how much Isiah has cost the Knicks. The magazine estimates...

Make Shea Rock Slightly Harder This Year
Right now, you can vote for the song that the Mets should play during the eighth-inning singalong at Shea this year. The choices are as boring as you'd expect: "Brown Eyed Girl," "Sweet Caroline," ... jeez, is that the theme song from "Friends?" Ack!...

Pedro Hears A Pop
You didn't think Mets fans were going to stay happy and optimistic about the season very long, did you? Pedro Martinez pulled/tore/yoinked his hamstring/tendon/groin/anal fissure and very well might miss a few weeks. As if just to rub it in, new reliever Matt Wise gave up a walk-off homer to Robert ...

Shaq's New Diesel
The black Perez Hiltons over at Media Take Out unveiled some photos of Shaq and his post-divorce hook-up, who if memory serves me correct, looks alarmingly similar to Shaq's ex-wife, Shaunie. (It seems Shaq has a thing for cinnamon-colored ladies with Legend of Billie Jean haircuts. )...