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Stephon Marbury Should Be A Professional Prognosticator
It's particularly amusing in the wake of the great Zach Randolph "possession." How young we were back in July 2007 ... how little we knew!...


We Can Only Imagine What The Parent-Teacher Conferences Are Like
Further proof that Texas is tougher than your state: Even the first-grade teachers are bad-ass. A couple of them engaged in fisticuffs at a youth basketball game on Saturday, leaving one bloody and bruised, and the other on the lam from police. No word yet on whether either of them is hot....

Isiah Thomas' Knicks Legacy, Summed Up In One Possession
You might have seen this already, but honestly: We've yet to see one play encapsulate a team's season more accurately than this Zach Randolph "possession" right here....

Highlanders! There Can Be Only One!
The College Basketball Closer is written by the gang at Storming the Floor....

Those Eight Percent Shooting Nights Will Get You Every Time
Just great. One round into the District 3 Class A high school boys basketball playoffs in Pennsylvania, and my brackets are already in shambles. The team I had picked to reach the finals, the York Country Day Greyhounds, lost to the Scotland Cadets 74-5 last week. Yeah, think that the Knicks' 40-poi...

I Know What You're Wondering, And The Answer Is Yes, I Have Taped You Masturbating
Welcome to the Deadspin Guest Lecture Series. Each week, we'll be inviting various luminaries from the world of sports - players, coaches, broadcasters, and MORE! - to speak to you Deadspin folks. This week: Former Patriots assistant and eye of the Spygate maelstrom, Matt Walsh....

May Isiah Thomas Never Leave Us
We know it was mentioned in the NBA Closer, but we really have to delve further into what happened with Isiah Thomas and the Knicks in Philadelphia last night....

Baseball Season Preview: New York Mets
For the third consecutive season, we are proud to introduce the Deadspin Baseball Season Previews. Yes, baseball is awfully close now; it's spring training, after all....

Keith Van Horn Has A Nice Gig, If You Can Get It
After the Jason Kidd trade finally went down — Mark Cuban says "this deal will have impact!" — the one question everyone had was ... Keith Van Horn's still playing? No, he isn't, which you probably know by now; he just never filed the papers. And now he's even richer than he was before....

The Banality Of Steroid Use
Andy Pettitte spoke today at Yankees camp about steroids. He said all the right things, and answered all the questions in all the right ways, the way baseball players have always said the right things and answered all the questions in all the right ways, for generations: Show a sliver of humanity, ...

Who's Sorry Now? Patriots Spygate Edition
So who does one believe in this Matt Walsh vs. Bill Belichick videotaping-the-Rams-Super-Bowl-walkthrough controversy? Is Walsh, as Belichick would have us believe, a rogue agent, out there operating without any decent restraint, totally beyond the pale of any acceptable human conduct? Or is Belichi...

Rams' Lawyers Attempt to Do What Team Could Not
It's two weeks after Losergate (or, if you will, Super Bowl XLII) and people are still making a hue and cry over cheating charges leveled at the now-humbled Patriots. The latest comes from former Rams player Willie Gary and two Rams season ticket holders, who are suing the Pats, seeking $100 millio...

Finally, You Know What Those Sad And Poor Kids In Mock Title Shirts Look Like: Sad, And Poor.
The New York Post helpfully had the pictures this morning of what we've all been asking: What happened to those Patriots 19-0 jerseys?...

Only Devean George Understands The Power He Wields
Of all the comments in the wake of the Jason Kidd trade that was, oddly, blocked by Devean George of all people, our favorite might have been in the live blog of the Mavs' game against the Blazers:...

There's No 'I' In 'Douchebag'
Drew over at KSK asked Johnny at Metroville to write a piece about what it means to be a Patriots fan, one week later. We decided it would be a better fit here. You decide....

The Patriots Petition: Greatest Hits
Time to check in on the petition for the NFL to investigate the final 1:40 of Super Bowl XLII, as seen on Petition Online.com (and mentioned here on Saturday). Petitions on this site are usually pretty tepid, bewildering affairs: Take for example petition for the betterment of UNC football (26 signa...

...And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of The Mets
Well, it appears everything can't work out this offseason for the Mets. The sign guy died. The Phillies are once again the team to beat in the National League East....

Love Means Never Having To Tolerate Your Wife's Saggy Breasts
So, the more Brian McNamee opens his mouth, it becomes less clear who's more of a horrible human being. Is it the opportunisitic "trainer" who ratted out his clients who gave him a career? Or is it Roger Clemens, so deluded by his own legacy that he's absolutely convinced himself that he did nothing...