new Page 1172 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
You Can Make Antoine Walker an All Star Again!
Some enterprising internetters over on the RealGM message boards have hatched a plan to corner the NBA All Star voting market involving cookies (not the kind you throw or use to torture). I'm a moron so I don't really understand all of their Internet Explorer speak but I have deduced that they are q...
All Aboard The Marbury Express
Someone told us this morning that Stephon Marbury is basketball's version of "30 Rock"'s Tracy Jordan. This makes a lot of sense to us. You get a sense that, deep down, each is probably a good-hearted person, but they're so many different kinds of crazy that it doesn't even matter. And they're almos...
After All That, Some Disappointing A-Rod Normalcy
Say what you will about Barry Bonds, but we certainly owe him one favor: For 20 hours or so, he made everybody stop talking about Alex Rodriguez. We are sure Scott Boras is appreciative....
It's Almost Like A-Rod Never Left
So, after all that, after the World Series "breaking news," after Scott Boras' posturing, after it all ... A-Rod's probably gonna end up a Yankee after all. A-Rod is apparently getting his publicity advice from Kobe these days....
Marbury Decides Against The Nuclear Option
So Stephon Marbury played for the Knicks on Wednesday — albeit $180,000 lighter in the wallet — saying "I'm positive all the way around. Whatever happened in the past is in the past." Damn it. Apparently some sort of deal with Isiah Thomas was brokered, and the skeletons will remain in the closet....
Sure, Sure, A-Rod Totally Wants To Be A Yankee Again
So, after all this, after the whole stupid thing ... it's becoming apparent that Alex Rodriguez might end up crawling back to the Yankees after all. And without Scott Boras....
Let The Mardy Collins Era Begin!
Just when you think the New York Knicks can't possibly implode any more dramatically ... they find new and inventive ways to self-immolate. And this one's fun too: There might even be more Isiah Thomas dirt than we had imagined!...
Where In The Heck Is Stephon Marbury?
Seriously, now ... what the heck is going on with the Knicks and Stephon Marbury? One would think, after a team gives a job to the woman you humped in the back of your truck, you'd have a little gratitude. No loyalty in this world, we tell you....
Bill Belichick Is A Surly Dick
Michael Showalter is one of the minds behind The State and Stella and the writer and star of the films Wet Hot American Summer and The Baxter. We're a fan. He also, apparently, is a sports fan. To promote his new album Sandwiches And Cats, he's doing a pseudo tour of the various lousy blogs like our...
David Wright Has A Head Wound
We don't have the slightest idea what the heck David Wright was doing wearing his ninja hat on SNY last night ... but heavens, man, that kid's gone plum crazy. UPDATE: Turns out, this was in honor of cancer patients. Yes. Ahem. Well then. We're dicks.)...
We Suspect The Pats Have Videotape Of The Incident
How do you know the Patriots are having a breakthrough, historic, crossover season? It's not just that they're undefeated; they now have their own crazy stalker lady....
Heat Find A Way To Suck Even In Victory
The Miami Heat hadn't won a game since April 13, and that includes this preseason. So when Jason Williams hit a jumper wirg 19 seconds remaining in the game to give them 75 points, it looked like another loss; the sixth straight of the regularseason. But no! The Knicks — God bless 'em — onloy scored...
Pedro's Offseason Workout Regimen
Far be it from us to tell a professional athlete how to live his/her life, but heavens, Pedro, you're turning into Schilling....
Marbury Wants You To Know That Only He Sells Cheapass Shoes
Considering he has testified under oath that he had sex with a Knicks intern in his car — and then helped get her a better job! — Stephon Marbury needs all the good PR he can get. Hence, those cheap sneakers he sells, which help inner city kids become more like Stephon Marbury, which is totally a go...
Don Shula Will Assign You An Asterisk And You Will Wear It
We knew there was something missing from the NFL season: An asterisk controversy. Of course. Well let's get right to it. Don Shula — who coached the 1972 Miami Dolphins to the only unbeaten season in NFL history — says that the Patriots should get an asterisk if they finish 19-0 this season....
Isiah, Knicks Manage To Stay Out Of Trouble For A Day
Ed. note: This was supposed to go up this morning, but better late than never.• Are You Going To Get In The Truck? First our Isiah Thomas quote of the day: "It's always good to win your home opener, and for us here in New York we struggled last year at the start of the season at home,'' Thomas said....
Patriots Fail to Cover Spread, Claim Hollow Victory
• Was there ever any doubt? You could tell that it was just a matter of time before Tom Brady and Randy Moss could stick a dagger through the Indianapolis defense. For three quarters Tony Dungy's Colts controlled the field, but you can't keep a good man down long, and the same can be said of Bill Be...
New England Patriots Are The Saviors Of Alefgard
And there it is. The New England Patriots collected the Stones of Sunlight, the Staff of Rain, and the Token of Erdrick. Tom Brady will promptly whisk Princess Gwaelin away to a bed and breakfast somewhere south of Cantlin. Meanwhile, Bill Belichick will now reproduce a set of Erdrick weapons and ar...