new Page 1197 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Dance, She Is Over
Something seems amiss today. We can't quite put our finger on it ... a great disturbance in The Force, like a million baseball fans crying out at once. So we did what we always do when world events confuse us; we headed over to Wikipedia. And sure enough:...
How To Get Fake Lost At Yankee Stadium
Of all the amusements at a baseball game, few things tickle our proverbial fancy more than The Guy Who Can't Find His Seat. He's always carrying a hot dog, or more beverages than he can handle, and he's got that clueless look of the guy who has never been to a game and is just waiting for someone to...
Now That's A Serious Looking Contract
We don't mean to imply that there's a possibly new New York Islanders general manager Garth Snow — shown here on a "scouting trip" — might not necessarily be ready for life in a board room, considering just last year he was the team's backup goalie....
NFL Roundup: Mangini's Workout Regimen
Muses and ruminations after Week 1 of the NFL ......
NFL Pants Party: NFC East
People are saying that this division is so stacked that it's a pity someone has to finish last. We say think it's a pity someone has to finish first....
NFL Pants Party: NFC South
Well, no matter what happens with the NFC South, we will always know they have the most adventurous cheerleaders. Nothing to turn up one's nose at....
A Little Fired Up Down In The Red Zone
Forget the exploits of Peyton Manning and Ben Rothelisberger. Years from now, when you're balancing your great grandchildren on your knee, you can tell them that you were there on the day that Detroit Lions assistant coach Joe Cullen was arrested for driving in the nude. "But was he totally nude, gr...
NFL Pants Party: AFC East
Personally, we think the AFC East would be a lot more fun to make predictions for if Troy Brown had to play quarterback for the Patriots every game. Oh, and is Culpepper organizing the rookie party for the Dolphins this year?...
Who Can Make A Difference? Parents Like You
One just never knows what mayhem will erupt when the Redskins meet the Bears. Anything can happen ... um, did we mention that these Redskins and Bears are 12 years old? Proving that the ghost of Woody Hayes does indeed roam the earth looking for bodies to possess, an assistant youth football coach i...
Deadspin HOF Nominee: Marcus "New Mexico" Vick
We can't take credit for the beauty that is Ron Mexico, because it came before our time, so we can only have fun with the next best thing: His little brother Marcus, who has the most fun you can possibly have without actually having herpes....
You Take It ... No, You Take It ... No, YOU Take It!
From the Magazines That We All Loved As A Child And Now We Need To Be Reminded, In Fact, Exist Department, the St. Louis kids at The Sporting News learned today they have finally been sold, to, of all people, Si Newhouse and the Conde Nast empire....
The Closer: OK, For One Night, We Don't Despise You
Notes from a day in baseball:...
NFL Season Preview: New York Jets
We are officially less than a month before the start of the NFL season, so it's probably time to start previewing the monster. The key to the NFL's success — other than fantasy football and gambling, of course — is the rabid nature of its fans. That is to say: You don't see a lot of people painting ...
Controversy Rocks The Little League World Series
It seems we have proven once again that, when it comes to baseball, you should probably take what we say and expect the exact opposite. The team from Columbus, Ga. beat Kawaguchi City, Japan, 2-1, on Monday to claim the Little League World Series title, as America finally exacts revenge for the Wo...
New Mexico State Basketball Player May Have D'd Up A Pizza Guy
It seems like the only time that pizza guys get any attention are in plot attempts in porno (did you order the extra sausage?) and criminal activity. File this one into the latter category....
The Lastings Milledge Ho-Down
We've had several people ask us this morning: Hey, how about those Cardinals? Actually, a few variations on the them, a 32 Short Films About Glenn Gould type of thing....
Drew Henson, Man Of Many Ugly Hats
Has there ever been an athlete more consistently overconsidered, for such an extended period of time, as Drew Henson? The guy has been all potential, zero performance; he's Ryan Leaf, except he did it in two sports ... and he wasn't very good in college either....
Willie McGinest, Logic Monolith
This picture of new Cleveland Browns defensive end Willie McGinest — by the way, did you realize where Browns training camp was? Berea! — shows him wearing No. 55, the number he has worn since he played for USC more than a decade ago....
Hacking Bernie
We recognize that, unless you're Curt Schilling, it can be pretty difficult for a Major League Baseball player to keep up with this Internet usage on the road. And when someone has a site of their own to manage, it can be doubly difficult....
Clinton Spends His One Night A Year With His Brother At Shea
We didn't notice this from our seat about three miles overhead, but former President Bill Clinton was at Shea Stadium last night, saying the fact that the Cardinals were the visiting team was at least part of the reason he came by....