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How Grand Central Station Almost Died
Here's some goodness from our chum Kevin Baker:...

Topless Woman Crashes News Report At Pride Festival
CityNews reporter Natalie Duddridge had one hell of a day at the office yesterday. It began with a Brazilian soccer fan bringing the "fuck her right in the pussy" fake news blooper to life, and it ended with a very happy/drunk World Pride attendee shaking her boobs right at the camera during a live ...

Let's Watch Bartolo Colon Swing Poorly In Slow-Mo
Earlier this season, Bartolo Colon recorded his first hit since 2005. (He now has two on the season!) But in the fourth inning of today's Mets-Pirates game, he wasn't Bartolo the Slugger. He was Bartolo the Whiffer....

Mike Napoli After Hitting Homer Off Masahiro Tanaka: "What An Idiot!"
Mike Napoli had some not-nice thoughts about Yankees pitcher Masahiro Tanaka's pitch decision after he smacked a go-ahead home run off of Tanaka in the top of the ninth last night....

Dwyane Wade And Chris Bosh Opt Out Of Contracts
The shell of Dwyane Wade has opted out of the remaining two years and 41 million dollars on his contract in hopes of signing with the same team for less money. Wade is looking instead to spread 60 million over four years. Chris Bosh has also opted out of his remaining $42 million, and is reportedly ...

Islanders GM On Draft Pick: "He'll Fit Right In; They Shit On Me, Too"
The New York Islanders traded back into the first round and selected Josh Ho-Sang with the 28th pick in the NHL draft Friday night. Islanders GM Garth Snow apparently saw something of a kindred spirit in the much-discussed 18-year-old out of the Ontario Hockey League because now he thinks he's got s...

<em>Good Day New York</em> Anchor Gets Horny Over His Female Colleague's Body
The folks at Good Day New York sent a correspondent out out to the newly renovated Action Park in New Jersey yesterday. It was an assignment that made for some fun on-the-scene reporting from Anna Gilligan. It also presented a good opportunity for Greg Kelly to do some heavy-breathed creepin' on his...
![The German Press Is Talking Shit About Us, You Guys [NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/785213651788855442.jpg)
The German Press Is Talking Shit About Us, You Guys [NSFW]
Everyone is gearing up for this afternoon's colossal clash between the U.S. and Germany, and the Germans are no exception. The cocky bastards that they are, almost all of the coverage in their papers pretty blatantly take shots at our boys....

A Sense Of Where You Are
From Clancy Martin's review of Geoff Dyer's new book:...

Report: Jozy Altidore To Miss The U.S.-Germany Match
On Twitter, Andrew Wiebe is reporting that Jürgen Klinsmann has already ruled out Jozy Altidore for the next match against Germany as he still recovers from his hamstring strain:...

Melo has officially opted out of his option for 2014-15. The Knicks can still pay him the most—about $129 million over five years to four years $96 million for everyone else—which means at least something since Anthony is 30 now. The Bulls, who have not scored a regulation field goal in two years, a...

Steve Martin: A Very Funny Fellow
There's a good excerpt from Mike Sacks' new book, Poking a Dead Frog: Conversations with Today's Top Comedy Writers, over at the New Yorker....

Marcell Ozuna Ends The Game With A Perfect Laser To Home Plate
This Marcell Ozuna highlight is from Friday night, but it's still awesome enough to post now....

Report: Melo Will Opt Out Of Knicks Contract, Become Free Agent
We have a Sunday Wojbomb. Carmelo Anthony will reportedly opt out of his contract with the Knicks and test free agency....

Richard Thompson Muddies Commonwealth Predictions All To Hell
Jamaica, right? That's where the winner of the Commonwealth Games' men's 100 meters should come from. Enter Richard Thompson, of Trinidad and Tobago, who has now cast serious doubt of a Jamaican champion. ...

Report On Drunks At Luke Bryan Concert Features Really, Really Drunk Guy
You are probably not going to see anyone as drunk as the guy featured in this report on a Luke Bryan concert tonight in Pittsburgh, as aired on WPXI's 11pm news....

Aaron Hernandez Requests Jail Transfer For His Own Safety
Attorneys for former Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez, who is charged with three homicides, have filed papers requesting a transfer out of Bristol County Jail. Hernandez's attorneys want him closer to Boston to cut down on travel time, but also claim Bristol County Sheriff Tom Hodgson has a clear ...

"Spain Was The Titanic": The World Reacts To A World Cup Collapse
It's full-on postmortem time in Spain and around the soccer world, as people grapple with La Roja's ignominious exit from this year's World Cup. One of the finest international runs the sport has ever seen went out not with a whimper, but with an embarrassing, well-documented shriek....

Pat Riley Says The Heat "Don't Need To Rebuild"
The biggest question of the NBA offseason will be what becomes of the Miami Heat, who obviously cannot challenge again with LeBron James, Dwyane Wade's corpse, Chris Bosh (who is good and whatever but making a shitload of money), and the rest of the crap roster. It was perhaps Pat Riley's biggest co...